I've no-one to talk to....

weeze210

Spendless wrote: »

You need the bathroom MORE. It's affected your stress levels and would mine too, if I had no bathroom and just an outside loo. Your DH is going to HAVE TO take time off to sort it. If a weekend is out, then he'll have to take time from his week job. He will be entitled to so many paid hols. And please go to your GP and see if you can get referred for some counselling or similar for yourself.

He's self employed so no holiday pay!

I've tried to make an appointment but I've got to phone back in the morning.

There isn't a bike school next weekend so hopefully it might get done?

balletshoes

weeze honestly, the more you post, the more depressed you sound. As in, you need to talk to your GP, as soon as possible.

There are many practical suggestions we can make (and have made) which could start improving things, but you're not capable of hearing and taking them in at the moment - because you are depressed.

Please make an appointment with your GP, and talk to them. Print off your posts in this thread and take them with you, and don't miss any points off when you talk to your GP.

The help is there, but you have to start it off, so make that call to your GP, today.

weeze210

Son is home from school.
Me "had a good day?"
Son "no"
Me "Why?"
Son "boring"
Me "Why was it boring?"
Son "just was"
Me "There must be a reason?"
Son "its just boring"
Me " well what did yo do?"
Son "nothing its boring"
Son grabs a drink and a chocolate and off to his room to play xbox and talk to his "old" friends.
Thats him now until I ask him what he wants for tea which will get the response "nothing, not hungry" But I'll make something anyway then he'll come down after being called several times, complain that he's not hungry but will eat it just so he can escape and return to his room. Then I won't see him unless I go up there or he comes down to go outside and use the loo. Later I'll shout bedtime several times. I'll have to go up there a few times to make him put his pj's on and come down to brush his teeth in the kitchen sink and use the outside loo. Not very exciting. I'll be down here on my own. Got to take the dog for a short walk (bad foot, dog not me!) and do the tea. Hardley see anyone when we're out for a walk so spend the time thinking and quiet often crying so perhaps its good that I don't bump into anyone. And now its raining, again.

balletshoes

weeze210 wrote: »

He's self employed so no holiday pay!

I've tried to make an appointment but I've got to phone back in the morning.

There isn't a bike school next weekend so hopefully it might get done?

glad you've tried to make your appointment, get on that phone at 8am tomorrow morning.

Hopefully the bathroom will get done next weekend? Not good enough to hope for it, you need to tell your OH now that you'd like the bathroom to get sorted out next weekend. Tell him what you'd like, don't automatically think he's intending doing it.

fluffnutter

weeze210 wrote: »

He's self employed so no holiday pay!

I've tried to make an appointment but I've got to phone back in the morning.

There isn't a bike school next weekend so hopefully it might get done?

No 'hopefully' about it. Try not to be so passive. Let your husband know that you expect it to be done next weekend because the lack of bike school provides him with the perfect opportunity to sort it out.

You're not at the complete mercy of his whims, his decisions. Be firm!

weeze210

balletshoes wrote: »

weeze honestly, the more you post, the more depressed you sound. As in, you need to talk to your GP, as soon as possible.

There are many practical suggestions we can make (and have made) which could start improving things, but you're not capable of hearing and taking them in at the moment - because you are depressed.

Please make an appointment with your GP, and talk to them. Print off your posts in this thread and take them with you, and don't miss any points off when you talk to your GP.

The help is there, but you have to start it off, so make that call to your GP, today.

Have phoned the Dr but have got to phone back in the morning.

fluffnutter

weeze210 wrote: »

Have phoned the Dr but have got to phone back in the morning.

Great start. Make sure you do.

FatVonD

OP, many years ago I had a bit of a meltdown because everything had just got too much for me, my son was being bullied, I was moving house and terrified my buyer was going to pull out, I was under pressure at work and I'd just ended a relationship.

Eventually I went to my GP and dissolved into tears and he said that everyone has a breaking point for stress and that I'd just reached mine. There was no shame in admitting it was all getting too much for me, you need to see your doctor and you need to remove these things that are stressing you out one at a time. Your son is your priority then move on to the bathroom, if you decide that you need to move back home it will need to be done in order for you to sell or rent the house. If you decide to stay it needs to be done for your sanity

Re the thrush, my husband suffers from it but as more of an intestinal thing and he's found that drinking those Yakult things has cleared it where all the medication in the world didn't. I know yours is slightly different but it might be worth a try?

balletshoes

weeze210 wrote: »

Son is home from school.
Me "had a good day?"
Son "no"
Me "Why?"
Son "boring"
Me "Why was it boring?"
Son "just was"
Me "There must be a reason?"
Son "its just boring"
Me " well what did yo do?"
Son "nothing its boring"
Son grabs a drink and a chocolate and off to his room to play xbox and talk to his "old" friends.
Thats him now until I ask him what he wants for tea which will get the response "nothing, not hungry" But I'll make something anyway then he'll come down after being called several times, complain that he's not hungry but will eat it just so he can escape and return to his room. Then I won't see him unless I go up there or he comes down to go outside and use the loo. Later I'll shout bedtime several times. I'll have to go up there a few times to make him put his pj's on and come down to brush his teeth in the kitchen sink and use the outside loo. Not very exciting. I'll be down here on my own. Got to take the dog for a short walk (bad foot, dog not me!) and do the tea. Hardley see anyone when we're out for a walk so spend the time thinking and quiet often crying so perhaps its good that I don't bump into anyone. And now its raining, again.

I don't think you have to worry unduly with your son (that conversation, or a variation of it, goes on every day after school with thousands of parents and kids all across the country).

Pick up the phone this evening if you want to talk to someone, your family/close friends could be thinking that they haven't heard from you because you're so busy with your new neighbourhood!

Constant rain is depressing - I have felt a bit down and listless over the last week or so because of the dull grey skies and relentless peeing down on some days too.

bluebird

I think your husband is very selfish to leave you without a proper working bathroom.Tell him you want it fixed or you leave! simple as that,he's not thought about you at all, from everything you say he is satisfying his own whims,don't be a doormat for him to walk over, you deserve better so tell him so.
I hope you come back and say the bathroom is sorted soon.