leaving children for 6 months

cobbingstones

Could they not meet up with you at one of the ports you may visit? Is that possible?

Good luck on your decision. x

Alikay

I wouldn't do it. Having our children was a choice DH and I made, and one of the negatives we had to weigh up was the lack of personal freedom for 18 years. He was in the Army and we agreed that he'd continue for a few years, but once their education became more important he'd do something which allowed more stability for the family. Luckily that worked out, but there were sacrifices he made career-wise for a few years (lower pay, less respected job and nearly 10 years of part-time study after a busy day at work).

I know sometimes things happen which mean plans don't work out, but the OP is considering a choice rather than a necessity to be apart from her children for 6 months, and I think the family unit will suffer if she goes.

She posted to see what the response would be, and if people would have a negative opinion of her parenting if she went. Clearly quite a few people will. However it's her and her family's decision and she's arguing a pretty good debate on the positives!

gingin_2

jamespir wrote: »

i think if its a once in a lifetime oppurtunity you should take it im sure dad will look after the kids fine

It's not once in a lifetime though. There will still be cruise ships in 10 years, there we still be people wanting to have their hair done on cruise ships in 10 years. The OP will have 10 years more experience and therefore more chances of getting the same job again.

Welshwoofs

GracieP wrote: »

I do actually agree with that and can't believe the crap like 'since when are you supposed to sacrifice yourself at the alter of child rearing' being spouted. If you choose to have a child, it's a decision you make and if you make it you need to commit to the fact that for the next 20ish years there is a new human being dependent on you.

Having a child dependent upon you does not mean that your entire life gets put on hold for 20 years. It's perfectly possible to raise a child and pursue your career.

But it does mean that day to day we will all live in the same house, and our kids will know that their parents are always available for them when they need us, which is worth more than any money.

But with respect, it's your opinion that being at home with the kids every day is the normal way to do it. In my wider family it's the norm to send children away to boarding school around the age of 8 so they certainly aren't under the same roof as their parents on a day-to-day basis.....however they did know they could rely on their parents and oddly none of them grew up into dysfunctional freaks with broken parental relationships.

Stingy_3000

You could also look at the situation from a different angle... What happens if you do not take the 6-month job? Will you resent your husband and your children for the rest of your life or remind them frequently of the sacrifices you made? That is no good for either of you.

I would try to imagine my life in 5 years time and see what pros and cons taking the job or not taking the job has had on me and my family...

All the best.

quantumleap

gingin wrote: »

It's not once in a lifetime though. There will still be cruise ships in 10 years, there we still be people wanting to have their hair done on cruise ships in 10 years. The OP will have 10 years more experience and therefore more chances of getting the same job again.

I agree with this. It is this element that has surprised me in this post. I'm not for one minute running down the OP's passion for her job however I can't accept that this is one of those once in a lifetime career opportunities that is going to change her life and the life of her family for ever and a day, which is what it should be for her to even consider leaving her family for 6 months (in my humble opinion!)

StumpyPumpy

gingin wrote: »

It's not once in a lifetime though. There will still be cruise ships in 10 years, there we still be people wanting to have their hair done on cruise ships in 10 years. The OP will have 10 years more experience and therefore more chances of getting the same job again.

On the other hand, my crystal ball says that if she takes the post now in 10 years there are going to be branches of "Kimberley's Hair Salon" up and down the country bringing in millions. She spends some of her time doing the occasional VIP request but mostly enjoys family life without being full of resentment and nagging doubts that a life changing opportunity was missed.

CH27

Running away won't solve your problems. In fact you may well find they are worse when you get back.

meer53

Lots of people have children and a career, there's nothing bad in that.

My opinion is that i would never be able to leave my children for 6 months, for anything. It's too big a risk to take. Yes, the children might be fine when she goes away but it's what happens in the future that matters. It will be hard for such young children to understand fully why their mum feels she has to do this. They won't understand the concept of furthering a career.

If the OP is so set on furthering her career, surely there are opportunities for her to do this without going away for 6 months ? I always thought that the big name/respected salons were all over the UK, do they have salons on cruise liners too ? Never been on one so can't comment really.

robpw2

you should go for it , if it was a man asking this question people would say go for it