leaving children for 6 months

anguk

Actually I've just had another thought (it happens occasionally ), what would happen if you found it wasn't quite the dream job you thought it would be, if the novelty wore off after a couple of weeks or maybe you missed your family and home too much? Would you be able to just leave and come home, I don't know how these cruise contracts work?

anguk

lilymay1 wrote: »

And for what its worth, I think people are being pretty harsh about the OP's choice of career. Variety is the spice of life, remember

I agree with that, it shouldn't matter if it's hairdressing on a cruise ship or 6 months swimming with dolphins on a paradise island, everyone's dreams are different.

DylanO

anguk wrote: »

I agree with that, it shouldn't matter if it's hairdressing on a cruise ship or 6 months swimming with dolphins on a paradise island, everyone's dreams are different.

Absolutely, but some dreams are more worthwhile than others. A parent spending six months working for Doctors Without Borders is in another league entirely to what the OP wants to do.

The day she became a parent she ceased to be the most important person in her life - or that's the idea. For someone to put being a hairdresser on a cruise ship above their children, there's something else going on.

toontron

I find this entire thread totally strange. The Op posts a question, but appears to have all the come backs for posters who think that she shouldn't go. I have to say I find the Op's attitude to her children rather detatched too.

Personally, I couldn't do it. Much as I moan about my kids (aged 12 and 9), I know that it would break my heart if they were upset or ill, and I wasn't able to look after them.

Saying that, the OP shouldn't be judged on her choices and if she thinks it will work for her family then fair enough, its nobody elses business.

Edwardia

I'm not a mother myself but I've been a nanny with 24/7 sole care in UK and abroad. Not all kids who have nannies or go to boarding school end up basket cases nor do the kids raised by single parents.

Mothers shouldn't become non-persons because they gave birth, and when other mothers say ooh no I couldn't be separated from my kids temporarily I think it's the mothers who aren't being independent enough, who see themselves as indispensible.

It does seem to me that OP is maybe subconsciously wanting time away from the problems. Personally I think a cruise ship is just a floating hotel and as I've worked in two of those, I can say they aren't glamourous. Looking after middle aged and elderly fussy Yanks would not be my idea of fun.

Training courses might be a better solution career wise. In the end you should do what you want and be responsible for your own actions.

Person_one

coolcait wrote: »

There's no harm in children developing the ability to be independent.

They're not really expected to be independent at 8.

You made them OP, you owe them.

Person_one

DylanO wrote: »

Absolutely, but some dreams are more worthwhile than others. A parent spending six months working for Doctors Without Borders is in another league entirely to what the OP wants to do.

I wouldn't agree with a parent of two children under 10 spending 6 months away for Doctors Without Borders either.

We all make choices in life, having children is not compulsory but if you do it there are sacrifices to be made. When you've created a person who only exists because of your desire for them to exist and depends on you so heavily for both their practical AND their emotional needs (which are just as important at that age) you don't just get to take a better offer when you get bored.

Nobody's saying you can't have your own life, but there's a pretty big spectrum between pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen and thousands of miles away for 6 months with little contact.

coolcait

Person_one wrote: »

They're not really expected to be independent at 8.
.

They can be "developing the ability to be independent" at that age, however.

A different concept from the idea that they're "expected to be independent" at that age.

As I also said in the post you partially quoted "Adult partners should already have that ability [to be independent]"

Again, a different concept from "developing the ability to be independent".

GracieP

ognum wrote: »

But life is not just about financial benifits it's about fulfilling your life in a way you choose. 6 months away is a small part and will give endless experience and things to talk to children about

I wasn't commenting on my opinion, just that it's a complete crock to claim people don't say that about men.

Person_one

coolcait wrote: »

They can be "developing the ability to be independent" at that age, however.

A different concept from the idea that they're "expected to be independent" at that age.

As I also said in the post you partially quoted "Adult partners should already have that ability [to be independent]"

Again, a different concept from "developing the ability to be independent".

Yeah, 8 is still too young to be fine and dandy with your mum disappearing for 6 months, sorry.

I went away with my grandparents for a week at 8, that probably helped to develop my independence, what the OP is talking about is something else entirely.