I know I shouldn't be offended but...

cte1111

I would talk to him about it. Just be honest and straightforward, e.g. you were tidying up and found the receipt. It will be a difficult conversation, but IMHO better than brooding on it.

Engagement and wedding rings are so symbolic that if you don't clear it up now, then you might well spend many years looking at it and feeling dissatisfied and annoyed.

peachyprice

OP, have you actually checked the hallmark for 375 (9ct) or 750 (18ct)?

mrcow

Just make sure you go wedding ring shopping together - and make it a corker.

globetraveller

I can't believe anyone would be stupid enough to put a receipt for something he has lied about in the bin for you to see. So perhaps it might have been a present for someone else. Peachyprice posted what I was going to say- surely you have checked the hallmark?
If he has been lying then you do have a lot to think about. Does he work at all? Why are you paying most of the bills and doing all the housework? What does he spend his money on? (Even if he wasn't lying, you need to be thinking about your situation- you might be happy now but is this what you want for the rest of your life?)

mrcow

In fact, I'd probably ask if we could rebuy the engagement ring. Tell him you'd like white gold instead as you're going to have to wear it every day and you'll help him choose it.

If he says that he's already spent a fortune on the ring, tell him that you know he didn't as you have the receipt.

Pick a ring, and let him do the rest. If you leave yourself festering on this, it's going to turn into even more of a "thing"

Mojisola

BMSrachael wrote: »

But I do so much for him, he literally never has to lift a finger, I pay for most things, I look after the house, cook all his meals as well as working full time and doing a part time degree and leading my own life. And I do it because I like looking after him and I know he loves me.

This is a relationship - but not a marriage - it's a description of a parent/child relationship.

You may be happy with it now. I'll be amazed if you still feel the same in 5, 10 or 20 years!

ruby-roo_2

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Any excuse for a little Henry

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

I wasn't expecting that :eek:

I had visions of watching 'Horrid Henry' getting caught out lying. I clearly spend far to much time around kids!

Person_one

BMSrachael wrote: »

But I do so much for him, he literally never has to lift a finger, I pay for most things, I look after the house, cook all his meals as well as working full time and doing a part time degree and leading my own life.

This is why I wouldn't marry him, not the ring thing!

Sounds like you've got a child, not a partner.


Now that I've read the thread, basically what everyone else said. Do you want an equal partner to share your life with, supporting each other through the good and the bad or do you want a sack of spuds weighing you down?

Imagine if you fell ill tomorrow, you couldn't work to pay for everything and you couldn't look after him but instead needed him to look after you and be the solid together one for the first time. Would he do it or would he just be gutted that his easy ride was over?

NickyBat

I personally would just tell him you have found the receipt, where does he want to keep it, and see what he says, if he offers any explanation or says anything else about it.

BMSrachael

I don't really do jewellery so wouldn't have known what I was looking at even if I did check the hallmark!

He does work, up until recently he spent the majority of his spare money on paying off debts from his youth. He does contribute to rent and bills so he's not a total !!!!!!!!!!. When I say I pay for most things I mean I pay for things like nights out and takeaways. I'm paying for us both to have the lifestyle I want and can afford, not the one he can afford. Which is my own choice after all. I was a full time student working in a bar when we met, so I know he's not just after me for my money

I suppose I should try and make him pull his weight more, thats the only thing we fight about the majority of the time. I just like things done my way I suppose, so its just easier to do it myself. But it does irritate me.

I knew the ring wouldn't be more than about 300 anyway, even with the exaggerations! And that's fine, its still lovely. But yeah, lying not good.