Should she stay over?

Uniscots97

Do what you feel is right but if it were me then the answer would be no. SS (now 20) tried this and refused to even let us meet the girl before she stayed over so the answer was no. He told us all his friends had girls to stay. His Dad and I told him no way, these girls weren't girlfriends (not mentioned or barely mentioned before asking whether they could stay over) they were just being used. SS did however bring a few girls to the house for sex whilst we were out, calling us to see where we were etc to make sure he wouldn't be caught. I only found out when I found one of the little tramps had been through my make up and boasted about it in the paper shop not realising I was behind her, I called the police (her face was a picture). SS cant do that now as due to my car being broken into we have cameras up, he's been told do not touch them on pain of death.

Morganarla

Having been a 16 year old girl myself, my answer would be a resounding 'NO!'

lazer

I'm almost 30 and my fiance still isn't allowed to stay over in my room.

raq

hi there

mine would be a NO. i never did bring anyone back to my parents as i would never have asked... I am now a 42 year old with 3 litle one,s of my own. on the subject someone pretty close to myself let there 15 year old son ( complete waster by the way ) let his 15 year girlfriend in the same bed. Mother so matter of fact about it. Pregnant properly by the end of the year. Know where am coming from....

IenjoyAbargain

My parents were never comfortable with my boyfriends staying over , especially as there was no spare room.

I`m now nearly 30 and in a long term relationship and while they have nothing against us living together , I think they prefer if we don`t share a room at their house as we not married and they have their own house rules.

MoaningMyrtle

I wouldn't allow it either, or my dd to stay at a boyfriends. She is 15 and I can't imagine allwing it for a couple of years yet.

She had a very, how can I put in nicely? persistent boyfriend last year and I told her in no uncertain terms that I would go to the Police if they did anything illegal. He was almost sixteen and she was fourteen. It was horrendous at the time and wouldn't hesitate to do the same with my younger daughter.

ellay864

My DS is 17, his gf is 16 and they do stay together at my house - in fact most nights they're together either here or at hers. By the time she turned 16 they'd been together for 6 months and althought I'm sure they were having sex during that time she was only ever allowed to stay over if she was in the spare room. If my other son was home, or my mum visiting, and there was no spare room, she didn't stay - end of. There was no way I was going to be seen condoing them having underage sex, whatever they might be doing when I was at work etc. Since she turned 16 it was less of an issue for me and they had been together a good while. If they spilt up and he started seeing another girl, I wouldn't just allow it on grounds of being old enough - I'd want to know they were pretty serious about each other.
And OP has younger kids which I'd also take into account. I was more careful with my older son, when younger one was also around. If OP's son is still at the huffing age I'd see that as all the more reason to stand firm!

ognum

There is eloping over and sleeping over.

time I believe for a conversation asking which it is! time to talk about whether they are in a sexual relationship, safe sex and precautions if they are. Being an ostrich wont help!

converse about where he would suggest she sleeps, what days would she be staying, will he be cooking dinner that night etc etc.

My children are adult and I never found just saying no was a useful way for them to learn. I never said a straight no to anything, we discussed it and they came to a sensible conclusion.

they are now both law abiding, house owning adults in good jobs and one at 32 is expecting his first child, we will see how that goes!

System

At 16 my parents let5 my bf stay over but he stayed in my room and i slept on the sofa (well actually we used to stay one night at home and the other in a hotel...so we could...you know ). This happened with the bf's after him too. Even though i was with one of my exes 3 years and the other 3 and 1/2. And i lived with them both. Though neither of their parents minded us sharing when i stayed there.

I'll be intrigued to see if they have the same attitude when my bf eventually has a gf

SmallL

I was in a relationship with my OH for about 3 months before i 'slept over'.
For the first few times we slept in seperate rooms (at his house, as mine didn't have a spare bed). We actually began having sex before we slept in the same bed, his mother cottoned on as he was sneaking out of his room at night.
She said she was absolutely fine with it as long as we were safe and my parents were fine with it.
I never actually asked if my parents were fine, but i assumed they were as they had previously offered to let my OH stay the night at my house. (Were not a really 'talky' family, especially when it comes down to those things!)
I think my parents trusted that i was mature and sensible enough even at that age to have a safe relationship-and im still with the same guy after 5 years!!

When i have a child i would hope they were mature enough at the age they get a boyfriend/girlfriend to be sensible about thier own relationship and would pretty much let them get on with it.