“I get to do what I want to do on a weekend”

Caroline73_2

Person_one wrote: »

I don't have children, but I don't envy people who are 'at home all day' looking after them one bit!

It looks to me like this is life for the husband:

• Work away 5 days with colleagues he's good friends with.
• Eat out 4 nights a week with these friends.
• 4 nights of undisturbed sleep each week in a hotel room cleaned by the maid.
• Coming home on a Friday to do his own thing such as playing games, seeing his extended family and doing favours for mates while getting his washing done, his meals cooked and his child cared for.

So yeah, technically he's the one working, but if the OP is in sole charge of a small child pretty much 24/7. Doing every 'get up', every feed, every bath, keeping him entertained etc. while also doing all the housework AND running a small business on her own, well, it looks to me like she's the real grafter in that marriage!

I've already said he was an !!!!.

But if Mildred chooses to run a business, sort through the contents of 3 houses, live in house larger than required without using childcare or a cleaner etc then she has to prioritize and allocate times for specific tasks, just like single mums who work outside the home.

louise3965

Do you love him? If you do then open your mouth, stamp your feet and demand change. If you don't do that I suspect you will feel even crapper about yourself than you appear to do already.

If you don't love him then think carefully about leaving him and starting a life sharing the parenting but living separately.

zzzLazyDaisy

mildred1978 wrote: »

Thanks.

No dryer (don't want one), so it takes a bit longer to do washing than that.

Well then get him to buy a spare set of everything so you can wash it at your leisure during the week and have it ready for when he returns at the weekend.

It doesn't matter how you do it, what I am suggesting is that you prioritise your life so that your weekends are as free as they can be, and organise things so that you and your OH spend some quality time together.

mildred1978

zzzLazyDaisy wrote: »

Well then get him to buy a spare set of everything so you can wash it at your leisure during the week and have it ready for when he returns at the weekend.

It doesn't matter how you do it, what I am suggesting is that you prioritise your life so that your weekends are as free as they can be, and organise things so that you and your OH spend some quality time together.

I know. Thank you.

Person_one

Caroline73 wrote: »

I've already said he was an !!!!.

But if Mildred chooses to run a business, sort through the contents of 3 houses, live in house larger than required without using childcare or a cleaner etc then she has to prioritize and allocate times for specific tasks, just like single mums who work outside the home.

Or, she could expect her husband to be an equal partner and make a contribution beyond paying 60% of the expenses...

I don't think this is remotely about time management during the week, its about the fact that at the weekend when she shouldn't have to think like a single mum, she still does.

Hanging_by_a_thread

mildred1978 wrote: »

Given your child is the result of an affair and raised with significant money from the state, I'm not sure you're one to lecture.

How did you decifer all that from Marleyboys post, or am I missing some history here? Anyhow back to your predicament. My advice, as gauling as it may be, is make yourself and hubby a cuppa. Go upstairs and try to talk to him.

It sounds to me as if you are having a horrible weekend and the only person who you can resolve these issues with is upstairs. Albeit acting like a child and sulking, but be the bigger person and put an end to all the upset. As much as you may be trying to shield him from it your child will be picking up on this atmosphere and thats not good or nice for him is it!

marleyboy

mildred1978 wrote: »

Oh sod off. You're boring me.

Is that what he tells you every night, or is it the other way around?

Be my pleasure, your a hypocrite, nothing more. End Of!

Kirri

marleyboy wrote: »

Should he ever read this thread, I wont blame him for turning around and saying "Tell you what..Monday I am jacking my job in, you can go to work instead whilst I look after little one."

As a SAHD I do not resent the time I spend bringing up my Son, nor do I resent my OH going to work in order to provide for our Son.

OH spends the weekends and the short hour each evening before bedtime, making up for all the missed opportunities she gets to play with him. She bears no resentment to the fact she is out there working hard to ensure the family as a whole can have the luxury of a roof over their heads.

Above all, I love her for the fact she works so hard to try and keep the family financially secure.

But your OH makes the effort, the OP's OH doesn't with either the child or her so ^^ isn't really relevant. The OP's OH acts more like a single man from what I've read on here, it doesn't matter which person goes out to work if they don't really want to know at home!

marleyboy

Kirri wrote: »

But your OH makes the effort, the OP's OH doesn't with either the child or her so ^^ isn't really relevant. The OP's OH acts more like a single man from what I've read on here, it doesn't matter which person goes out to work if they don't really want to know at home!

Sorry, but OP has made it perfectly clear in her below the belt replies exactly what she is like, its no wonder OH works 10 hour shifts, the poor guy has to go home to that, I DONT.

*max*

mildred1978 wrote: »

Given your child is the result of an affair and raised with significant money from the state, I'm not sure you're one to lecture.

Woah there! I have no idea what this is about, but that was totally out of order!