Urgh, Demanding Bridesmaid...

sugarwalsh

Ok, sorry, I thought they were both a size 8 - which is why I suggested something sleek! Why not have a look at some of the shops who provide for larger ladies? I think New Look even have a section? I am a size 16 and would only wear a structured strapless dress. I think as they are so different in size and shape you should probably look at different styles. I, personally, don't subscribe to the 'one size fits all' approach! Get her something she will feel stunning in and then she will be a much better MoH.
Megan

wanchai_2

It IS your day and your BMs should accommodate you and be willing to please you, absolutely. However, it would definitely be advisable to get them to try on the dresses to see what styles, colours and fabrics suit them. You want your BMs to look good, right?

My BM is a size 8 and really pretty, most clothes suit her. But there were colours and styles that just didn't look right on her when we were shopping for her dress.

Good luck xx

Pitlanepiglet

I chose a designer and a colour and then picked dresses that suited each of my bridesmaids - I had two very slim, early 20 something's and my best friend who was 15 years older than the youngsters and 3 stone heavier than she wanted to be having had her third child less than two years before. I was chuffed as nuts that she agreed to be my bridesmaid and wouldn't in a million years have made her wear something that she was uncomfortable in - she's my friend, I care about how she feels.

The two girls had strapless sleek frocks and BF had a more structured dress with straps that suited her shape. They all looked fab on the day and I loved the fact that they looked great. It wasn't all about me!

I share the same concern about the ASOS dress, the front is very high and if your friend has much up front it wouldn't be the shape that she would pick.

I also love the shape of the dress that your BMs have chosen, it looks lovely.

Lavendyr

Ultimately whether we - a bunch of random posters on an internet forum - like either dress is a bit by the by.

On the one hand, it is your day and if you are paying for their dresses it's my view that you should have the right to choose what they wear.

However, they are also your friends and I don't know about you, but I wouldn't have wanted my friends and sisters wearing dresses that made them feel uncomfortable or ugly on the day.

My bridesmaids tried on lots of different styles before choosing one that they all liked. I was happy for them to have different styles but they all (sizes 8-16) agreed on one style that suited them all. It was a strapless design but we had straps added, so that could be a solution if they don't like strapless dresses.

I suggest reiterating that you will pay (including alterations? These can get quite pricey when buying from a bridal/bridesmaid dress shop - mine cost around £40 per bridesmaid on top of the cost of the dress itself) and explaining to them the style that you are trying to go for, then arranging a day where they can try on different styles.

wanchai_2

Can I just say on behalf of my size 20 friend who has been a BM twice - strapless dresses that have straps added may as well still be strapless! I'm talking about this kind of thing (urgh):




If you're adding straps, at least try to make them look like part of the dress (i.e. preferably tapered), not just thin spaghetti-style 'token' straps. Or just go for a non-strapless dress and save the hassle of alterations.

becca0417

I'm sorry but when did being a bridesmaid stop being an honour? It never ceases to amaze me the amount of trouble they can cause. But I have my own issues with this and I haven't read the whole thread so maybe I shouldn't comment!! OP just wanted to say I hope you find something you love xx

Starrystarrynight

Might not be a popular view, but having been a big bridesmaid in a pale coloured, big dress, I know how uncomfortable I felt so my sympathy lies there.
I've seen a few episodes of the Bridezillas show, and the American brides and bridesmaids seem able to find dresses of the same colour, but in differing styles to suit different shapes and sizes. There has to be a way to find a good compromise.

Pitlanepiglet

becca0417 wrote: »

I'm sorry but when did being a bridesmaid stop being an honour? It never ceases to amaze me the amount of trouble they can cause.

Probably about the same time that brides ceased to care how their friends felt and it became "it's about ME!"

Lavendyr

wanchai wrote: »

Can I just say on behalf of my size 20 friend who has been a BM twice - strapless dresses that have straps added may as well still be strapless! I'm talking about this kind of thing (urgh):




If you're adding straps, at least try to make them look like part of the dress (i.e. preferably tapered), not just thin spaghetti-style 'token' straps. Or just go for a non-strapless dress and save the hassle of alterations.

May be just me but I don't think "urgh" at that at all! :S

wanchai_2

Starrystarrynight wrote: »

Might not be a popular view, but having been a big bridesmaid in a pale coloured, big dress, I know how uncomfortable I felt so my sympathy lies there.
I've seen a few episodes of the Bridezillas show, and the American brides and bridesmaids seem able to find dresses of the same colour, but in differing styles to suit different shapes and sizes. There has to be a way to find a good compromise.

I agree, and it looks lovely. It's definitely one of my favourite wedding trends!!!!






Mismatched dress and bouquets - pretty!!!!!!!