son and condoms

rev229

15yr DS has a girlfriend fairly sure they are active:eek:. Now he knows all the graphic details about why he should not do it and about using condoms. We no longer have a family planning clinic where we live, not that he would go! Do I buy him some condoms, there is no way he would buy them? Or hope that he has a supply from wherever. What do other mums do. A girlfriend pregnant is the last thing he/we need t the moment!

dizziblonde

When my mum went away on holiday and worked on the assumption I was quite likely to be getting horizontal so to speak she made sure she left me a large box of condoms. While I cringed with embarassment at the time - it did mean there were some available when the opportunity (and other bits) arose.

elvis86

rev229 wrote: »

15yr DS has a girlfriend fairly sure they are active:eek:. Now he knows all the graphic details about why he should not do it and about using condoms. We no longer have a family planning clinic where we live, not that he would go! Do I buy him some condoms, there is no way he would buy them? Or hope that he has a supply from wherever. What do other mums do. A girlfriend pregnant is the last thing he/we need t the moment!

I'd just carry on burying your head in the sand and hope for the best. Or, you could actually talk to your child and discuss it. If he's old enough to be doing it then he should be old enough to discuss it too.

soccermom

I have 3 sons and I always made it pretty clear to them that if they needed anything along the lines of condoms that they ask me. I was having sex at 16 so it's highly likely they were. I knew my youngest one was at 15/16.

My youngest is still 16 and going in the army in April he can afford to buy his own then.

I told my sons they didn't invent sex so there's no need to feel embarrassed about talking about it with me, I do require they leave out the graphic details though.

busiscoming2

We are lucky that we have an u21's FPC session locally and I know my ds2 and his girlfriend go. But I did buy him one of the little tins of condoms from Superdrug, purely because I thought they were dinky I had bought them with the intention of putting them in his xmas stocking but thought that might be a little embarrassing for him!

I would definitely buy him some, better to err on the side of caution. That's my opinion anyway.

Memory_Girl

Buy a big box at the supermarket and "ask" him to put them away in the bathroom. Sure he will cringe in embarrassment, but at least then he will know where they are.:D

Be completely non-plussed about the whole condom thing - or be a real witch and take him with you the next time you have to shop for female sanitary products - now THAT's embarrassing for a teenage boy.

MG

Person_one

Memory_Girl wrote: »

Buy a big box at the supermarket and "ask" him to put them away in the bathroom. Sure he will cringe in embarrassment, but at least then he will know where they are.:D

It doesn't need to be a dirty secret!

I'd sit him down, tell him that you're going to add condoms to your shopping list from now on and that they'll be stored in the bathroom cabinet/wherever and he doesn't need to be embarrassed if he takes the last one but to let you know to get more.

Surely you've had a talk about STIs, pregnancy etc? To be honest, I think if you're too embarrassed to buy condoms its a pretty good sign that you're too immature for sex and if I had a teenage daughter I'd advise her not to sleep with someone who wasn't grown up enough to buy them himself, after all girls have to deal with their own contraception!

newcook

I agree with others that its time for the ‘chat’ – even down to making sure he knows how to put one on (demonstrate on a banana), that he knows that the old cliches such as you cant get pregnant the first time/if I withdraw etc are a load of bull and he should still use one if his gf says she is on the pill.

Yes, it will be embarrassing for you both but you both need to put that aside and have an adult discussion if he is going to be doing adult things.
Even if they haven’t had sex yet at least this way he knows about contraception and you know he knows about contraception!!

Caroline73_2

rev229 wrote: »

15yr DS has a girlfriend fairly sure they are active:eek:. Now he knows all the graphic details about why he should not do it and about using condoms. We no longer have a family planning clinic where we live, not that he would go! Do I buy him some condoms, there is no way he would buy them? Or hope that he has a supply from wherever. What do other mums do. A girlfriend pregnant is the last thing he/we need t the moment!

why is there 'no way he would buy them'? Is it cashflow or embarrassment?

I'd be horrified to think my children couldn't talk to me about it or at least be mature enough to sort it out themselves. Please sit down and talk to your son about it. I find being trapped in the car is a good way to have important chats, they can't flounce off from there.

newcook

by the way, they sell them in the poundshop these days too

Bennifred

You should talk to him - if you think this talk is difficult, imagine the one about any consequences! He'd be more embarrassed if you had to take him to a clinic or to visit a maternity unit.......

I used to chant "No sex without a condom" (jokily - well it amused me anyway) at my boys every time they left the house after a certain age. It got to the point that they'd shout it at each other (and their Dad and me :eek:) if they heard anyone leaving the house.
I also made sure there were plenty in the bathroom along with the deodorant, spot cream, etc and that they knew that stuff was there to use, but never commented on the use of any of it - there is a limit, even in this house!