feel like all my dreams have been snatched :-(

Padstow

*max* wrote: »

Where on earth did you get the adultery thing from??? If this is based on nothing, then your judgemental attitude is out of order.

Also, why is it "so wrong" for a 14 year old to have a boyfriend?? It doesn't mean they are sexually active. Nothing wrong with it!

Wind your head in and read the whole thread.

Oldernotwiser

Gillyx wrote: »

It's Scottish Standard Grades as far as I am aware and the sylabus is taught over 2 years (or it was 7 years, god has it been that long, ago when I took the exams) she said her daughter would be going into 4th year, which would indicate to me she's in 3rd year now.

I know a lot schools may teach things in the same order etc but its not guaranteed.

Apologies for any grammar/typo errors, on my phone.

Aren't these taken at 16 (at the end of year 5) like GCSEs then? (Just interested.)

balletshoes

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Aren't these taken at 16 (at the end of year 5) like GCSEs then? (Just interested.)

in scotland you are generally 16 in 4th year, and yes, thats when you take your GCSE equivalent, at the end of 4th year.

Oldernotwiser

balletshoes wrote: »

in scotland you are generally 16 in 4th year, and yes, thats when you take your GCSE equivalent, at the end of 4th year.

Thanks for the explanation.

*max*

Padstow wrote: »

Wind your head in and read the whole thread.

Excuse me? Nowhere was it said that the OP's boyfriend cheated on his wife. You just chose to assume that to suit your judgemental opinions.

Moreover, the OP came back to reply that it was in fact his wife who cheated on him and that their youngest child may not even be his.

I think if anyone should try to keep up, it's you.

Gillyx

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Aren't these taken at 16 (at the end of year 5) like GCSEs then? (Just interested.)

No. I was 15 when I sat my Standard Grades, 16 and 17 respectively when I took my Scottish Highers. The dates for school age are 1st March - 28th February. I'm a September birthday, so was about average in the year, not the oldest nor the youngest.

You have 1st and 2nd year which are introductory to all subjects, then at the end of 2nd year you pick 8 subjects, which is what you will do for Standard Grade. You prepare for these exams over 2 years, (3rd and 4th year) Sit the exams at the end of 4th year, so most people will be 15/16 and then chose your subjects for Highers, which are done over one year (5th year) and if you chose to stay on can do more Highers in 6th year.

pyjamadays

padstow-maybe you should wind your head in and read the whole thread too!

dirtysexymonkey

Padstow wrote: »

Keep up, the boyfriend was cheating on his wife, making him an adulterer. Get it?

A boyfriend at fourteen is sexual, like it or not, it's sexual.

Don't care as I don't know the OP , but wish all three children well.

your a very angry bitter individual.

you owe the op an apology. the only person without any morals here is you.

belfastgirl23

This is a very tough situation for all of you. And the danger is that the more you discuss it the more entrenched it gets. What any of us think doesn't matter, what matters is you finding a way to try to come to some sort of agreement between you all. I understand where people are coming from on the 'a 14 year old wouldn't dictate to me' front, but my feeling is that if you bring her along kicking and screaming into a totally new environment including a stepfather and step brother, you are almost dooming the whole situation from the beginning.

Would you consider having some kind of family mediation to discuss this issue? At least it might help to dig you out of the trenches you're in right now. I also think it might help you sort through some of your own feelings about why you're so unhappy right now. Do you hate where you are for its own sake or just because your partner is elsewhere for example? Are you overstating how miserable you are to give yourself a reason to move in with him? Or are you overstating how great he is to get out of a place you hate? It does worry me that you're seeing this move as THE way to make yourself happy. I think you have some pretty oversized rose tinted glasses on. Which if you were just moving yourself would be ok, but when you have kids you can't afford to think like this.

I also think that you need to take her situation and her 'relationship' seriously. The thing is that from her point of view, it is serious, especially if it's first love. And after all if you say she can keep in touch via facebook, she will say the same goes double for you

Finally have you considered what would happen if your relationship went pear shaped? It does happen. Would you still stay in the same place? Would you move back to where you are living now? For both your own sake and that of the kids you need to think about this.

pinkclouds

Gillyx wrote: »

No. I was 15 when I sat my Standard Grades, 16 and 17 respectively when I took my Scottish Highers. The dates for school age are 1st March - 28th February.

Same here. Standard Grades at 15, Higher Grades at 16 and CSYS at 17. Furthermore, my unconditional offer to go to uni was based on my Higher Grade results - I deliberately chose to stay on for 6th year but many people go to uni after 5th year. (Although, of course, you could leave at the end of 4th year to start work or whatever. These days I think you have stay in some sort of education or training until 18 years old...?)

The next two years are *very* important for the OP's daughter if she is planning on going to university. She needs decent results in 8 Standard Grades and 5 Higher Grades. That's a lot of exams and disruptions should be kept to a minimum, if at all possible.