Would you sell DD's old toys on ebay for new ones for Christmas?

74jax

Yes, DD picked all items to be sold, I went right through her room a few weeks ago and gave it a really good clear out, put everything back in it's boxes and we made piles - bin, sell and keep.

The reason I now can't get her what I wanted was because I have ordered off the list which she said she would use the money off ebay for. Rather than send it back, I am thinking of keeping it. So the money I would have used for the other present will now be used on these two which I wouldn't have normally ordered.

I agree, I am trying to answer each post, whereas maybe I should just leave it now.

74jax

newcook wrote: »

but she doesnt have to scrimp and save - she has £150!! (well £170 if you include the money you are giving her)

But she was selling the items which made £150 to buy items to replace them with. Seems a bit mean to me to sell her old stuff and then have to buy Christmas presents with it. This isn't why she was selling the items. It was to replace with new ones.

I don't want her selling her DS game to buy me a present for Christmas. Maybe my circumstances will change, but at the moment she doesn't have too. The £150 is for items she wanted on a list.

brians_daughter

for the younger ones i often sell things they have outgrown/dont use anymore and either pop the money in their bank or buy new toys with it. for example summer 2010 ds had a baby/toddler slide that he hadnt used much - sold it on ebay for £25 and bought a bigger slide for a simular amount summer just gone.

If i have a big clear out i will put the money in their bank.

ds1 is 13 and have in the past sold some of his stuff IMO he is old enough to decide what he wants to do with the £

we have agreed in the past for 50% to go into long term savings 25% to go in short term savings (ie saving up for latest ps3 games or whatever) and the other 25% is for him to do with as he pleases. Hes very astute with money tho and it usually ends up in his long term savings

HOWEVER if the money was needed ie couldnt pay the mortgage then i would have to IOU them. If it was simply selling to buy replacements ifts for an occassion such as xmas then no i wouldnt do it - i dont think i would like it much if someone sold my gifts i was given last xmas in order to fund buying me new ones this year

If money is tight then you should sit with d and expalin the situ as a teenager she old enough to understand - if you expalin the situ could you not agree for you to loan the money from her and pay her back once youa re back at work?? seems sensible.. you can get her what you wnated to buy her and she is still going to get the money - just make sure she saves it and doesnt fritter it away on 'smash hits' or whatever it is today

onlyroz

brians_daughter wrote: »

HOWEVER if the money was needed ie couldnt pay the mortgage then i would have to IOU them.

You're saying it's OK to sell the kids' toys to pay the mortgage? :eek:

shellsuit

I've sold my kids toys in the past, but I've taken out any costs (ebay and paypal fees) and they get the remainder of the cash.

I would buy them more toys and stuff with the money, but what I wouldn't do is present those things to them as though I'd bought them.

brians_daughter

onlyroz wrote: »

You're saying it's OK to sell the kids' toys to pay the mortgage? :eek:

LOL. no what i am saying is if someone had recently raised a simular amount of money from ebaying unwanted/unused family items but then had a massive emergency it would be more reasonable to IOU that money than ask for a child to sell current possessions in order it to purchase xmas pressies for this year. Completely off topic, but i was trying to give extreme example of times when it would be ok to ask dd to put the money in another family pot (for a limited time) rather than her own

The only circumstance i could think of would be if the mortgage wasnt going to get paid (recently happened to a friend of mine went into work all shutters down owed £3000 in wages couldnt pay mortgage so had to 'borrow' it from the kids recent car boot sales- this is obviously whole new thread about having good budgeting skills, but i used that as an example as it was fresh in my mind from Jans recent experience )

balletshoes

74jax wrote: »

Question is really as per title.

I asked DD if she had anything she wanted to sell for money for Christmas, and she picked a few things for me to put on ebay and give her the money.

I then got together old DS games she didn't use (box one side of the room, game somewhere under the bed etc) DVD's and bits and bobs and placed these on ebay for myself to keep the money. DD saw what I was doing but was ok with me saying it was for new Christmas presents.

As things are selling DD is obviously seeing the money mount up, and asked if she could have the money for them (partyly in jest) and started making a list of what had sold for what.

As it was quite a bit of money, i was going to offer her half the money, however OH said if it was given to her as a gift then all money should go to her. DD loved this idea and so now I am in the position of having to transfer her £150 (shes 13, so this is a HUGE amount) and now what I had planned on getting her for xmas I can't.

OH is saying it wasn't my money anyway and would I have been happy spending her money on her again (errrr yes I would......)

So what I guess I'm asking is, has anyone ever sold their child's stuff and replaced toys etc with the money? Was I being really tight by doing this? I'm off sick at the moment and just gone down to half pay and this was really what I was counting on buying DD's christmas presents with, but now I'm left feeling what a terrible mother for even thinking such a thing. I am sure OH didn't really think I would have just kept the money and spent it on myself, as that's really not me, but I genuinely didn't see anything wrong in what I was doing (which I think is bad on me for not even seeing a problem....)

everyone is different.
In the scenario you've given, I would give my DD the money - but she wouldn't be getting £150 to spend, it would be going in her bank account.

Having said that, our most recent trip away was partly funded by my ebaying, which included clothes/dancewear and shoes which my DD had outgrown or no longer wanted to wear. However, I bought almost all of them, so I don't see the problem in selling them and using the money for what I see fit. DD has never even thought about asking for the money for those.
One item I sold was DD's old ipod nano, as she bought an ipod touch from her own money, and no longer used the nano. She also bought the nano from her own money, so I gave her the money for the nano once I'd sold it for her.

74jax

balletshoes wrote: »

Having said that, our most recent trip away was partly funded by my ebaying, which included clothes/dancewear and shoes which my DD had outgrown or no longer wanted to wear. However, I bought almost all of them, so I don't see the problem in selling them and using the money for what I see fit. DD has never even thought about asking for the money for those.

My DD was on the case quite quickly relating to clothes and shoes She got the money for some boots which she sold and hadn't worn, so made quite a bit on them. And also has had the money for some dresses which she might have only worn once or twice to weddings etc.

We have only just recently starting putting our clothes on ebay, we used to bag up for charity as and when she grew out of things. I think she's becoming more :money: savvy as she gets older........

victory

So confusing, sum it up you and DD are happy now with the way the money has been divided?

74jax

victory wrote: »

So confusing, sum it up you and DD are happy now with the way the money has been divided?

Yes we're now fine, we were last night, however I wanted to know other people's views and it kind of escalated from there.

A separate issue are the two items to be delivered that DD said would come out of this ebay money, but now she wants the ebay money. However I 'think' i'm going to keep them and not tell her and hope she doesn't buy them herself. This will mean she won't get a present I had planned on getting her, but I wasn't 100% convinced she needed it anyway.

But yes, on our side of things we're all ok, but I'm one of these people who loves to see how other people think and I always think this site is wonderful for that. There's no point in asking for opinions if you then take the huff when you don't like what you're told.