Just received this - please help

Doorstep_horror

Morning all, once again thank you for your kind words. And no I did not sleep very well got about 3 hours.

He is going to mortgage sp? Advisor today to raise a second mortgage, maybe remortgaged this property, so that we can stay here, he can find somewhere new and pay for both properties.

This was decided before any of this information was found out.

blue_monkey_2

And also to add, maybe the bloke is sending in drips and drabs because his wife/girlfriend is there and he has to do it all while she is not there. Likewise with the phone calls.

The OP has asked that he does not tell his wife/gf that she knows so maybe he cannot sit there for half an hour sorting through pics, plugging phone in etc... and he is doing it whenever he can get to the laptop for 5 mins otherwise she will get suspicious too.

blue_monkey_2

Doorstep_horror wrote: »

Morning all, once again thank you for your kind words. And no I did not sleep very well got about 3 hours.

He is going to mortgage sp? Advisor today to raise a second mortgage, maybe remortgaged this property, so that we can stay here, he can find somewhere new and pay for both properties.

This was decided before any of this information was found out.

So he was already planning on moving in with her. Otherwise why not rent somewhere?

I am not sure he will be able to remortgage the house if you have things going through the courts though. You will have to see a solicitor and then fill in some forms to get the legal aid. Don't let him remortgage the house before you have seen a solicitor.

My parents house was in my dads name, the court made him put my mothers name on the mortgage as well so he could not sell it from under her until my sister turned 18 - and then it was in the papers that when my sister turned 18 she would be able to have all of the house if she had 'complied to certain conditions' such as not marrying or having another man to live in the house (still a control freak even though they were divorced as he went off and married someone else a year or so later!!) but she got the house off him in the end through patience - and she lived with another man in HIS house and we were old enough to live in the house. HA HA! Too right after all he put her through!! He was mad as hell though as he fully expected to get the house back and I helped her get it sorted and his name off the deeds - the things he said to me........

Was there a reason that he did not put you on the mortgage even though you were married. I am sorry to say that this was probably always his intention to ensure that you had nowhere to live and be able to sell the house as he wished - and I think that he is actually going to get a bridging loan and then put the house up for sale as soon as the divorce papers are signed. This is why you need to get some legal help, please, please be very careful and seek help from a solicitor ASAP before he can do this.

adamantine

dont let him remortgage the house! if he is buying somewhere else he needs to get a mortgage on that house not take out another one on yours!

this sounds all too dodgy to me. if he remortgages now i think his thinking is he got a mortgage on the house in his own name AFTER separation so its no longer marital property and he can try to force you out.

CH27

Have you made an appointment to see a solicitor?

gratefulforhelp_2

OP for any remortgage he HAS to get your signature, despite it not being in your name.

Make sure mortgage co. knows you are not signing. Also you can get a solicitor to stop the house being sold, again, without needing to have house in your name. x

dirtysexymonkey

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

OP for any remortgage he HAS to get your signature, despite it not being in your name.

Make sure mortgage co. knows you are not signing. Also you can get a solicitor to stop the house being sold, again, without needing to have house in your name. x

the mortgage is in his name, as is the house? how can the op stop it? the house may be an asset of the marriage but if he sells it or remortgages, then the money becomes an asset iyswim?

dirtysexymonkey

blue_monkey wrote: »

He has been very snide - I am glad the other bloke has told you now I read this. Of course he wanted to do an online divorce, because if no solicitors are involved you would have happily given up half the house and done what, rented somewhere with the children and he would of gone away to buy his cosy little love nest with the other half.

Because you have children together then you will be entitled to stay in the house and he will have to pay for it. A solicitor will sort this out and because you do not work you will get legal aid so do not worry about a thing.

Honey, it's time for you to start screwing him - he has done this to you for long enough so it's payback time. And you'll not have to worry about any legal costs. Good luck. How you will keep this quiet I have no idea but you need to get tough.

I know this is tough to think about right now but in 6 months time you'll be able to thank the guy who told you and sent you those pics because he has done you a massive favour - although not nice to face now he has stopped your husband from screwing you over in regards to the house and no doubt maintenaince for the kids if he was prepared to take the house from under you.

wrong. that may have been the case a few decades ago but now its not that simple.

he doesnt have to pay for it at all. so unless there is enough equity in the house then the op may have to sell if she cant pay the mortgage alone. all she can expect post divorce is 20% of his income in child maintenance. no court will expect him to pay for a house if it means he cant afford to house himself and his children when they are with him.

Raksha

This has obviously moved on since the OP first posted, but I just wanted to say not all contact like this means the man is a love rat.

I was at home, on Christmas eve with my two little boys, when the phone rang. A very irate man was accusing my OH of having an affair with his wife.

I laughed, because he doesn't have the time - if he's not with me, he's at work!

Later that morning, I got a very apologetic phone call from the chap - it seems his mates at work were having a joke, as my OH is no Adonis.

However, if I hadn't had the faith in my OH that I had, where would this have left my little family over Christmas?

January20

Doorstep_horror wrote: »

To be truthful I think it does matter, at least to me. Because prior to this I thought it was all nicey nice, we were going to do a online divorce but now I feel like I've been lied to once to often and I need to do this via a solicitor.

Because in the past he has threatened to kick you out (even though you are married and he can't) and to take your children away, I think it is the best thing for you to have the advice of a solicitor, to have somebody professional on your side, fighting your corner and not allowing your H to make you believe any bull***t that he might come up with.