huge row with husband over leaving wedding early

Torry_Quine

JBD wrote: »

I don't see why anyone should not feel free to leave if they wish. A wedding is supposed to be enjoyable, not a prison sentence. And most married couples nowadays don't consider themselves joined at the hip, in fact some people even attend weddings without their partner.
Although it would seem that the OP's husband doesn't share that view, hence the argument.

I agree that married couples aren't joined at the hip. However I personally wouldn't go alone to a wedding and if I wanted to leave my husband would come with me as I'm his priority.

balletshoes

poet123 wrote: »

The person involved, but when they say;

"around 11pm i had a headache and went to put some tiisue in my ears which helped a bit."

It would not be surprising if others felt that trying a more effective remedy could have been tried first, or even at all.
And then perhaps ask themselves honestly whether if it had been their bf's wedding they would not have hoped their OH would have at least attempted to take a simple painkiller.

it was 1am - my OH wouldn't have had to use any excuse if he wanted to leave at that time. I would have understood, and stayed until the end myself, if I were part of the wedding party.

poet123

balletshoes wrote: »

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it was 1am - my OH wouldn't have had to use any excuse if he wanted to leave at that time. I would have understood, and stayed until the end myself, if I were part of the wedding party.

So you believe it was an excuse?

balletshoes

poet123 wrote: »

So you believe it was an excuse?

no I didn't say that - he could have just said "I'm tired and I'm going, have fun, see you later" that would have been fine with me.

poet123

balletshoes wrote: »

no I didn't say that - he could have just said "I'm tired and I'm going, have fun, see you later" that would have been fine with me.

That is fine, but not everyone sees it the same way. It wasn't ok with the Op's OH, for whatever reason he wanted her to stay, that being the case she could have tried a painkiller rather than tissues in her ears and still gone at 1am if she really felt no better, but she didn't do that.

Stephb1986_2

poet123 wrote: »

That is fine, but not everyone sees it the same way. It wasn't ok with the Op's OH, for whatever reason he wanted her to stay, that being the case she could have tried a painkiller rather than tissues in her ears and still gone at 1am if she really felt no better, but she didn't do that.

Perhaps the OP doesn't like taking tablets? If you want to go home you go home better than sitting there with a bad face isn't it?

Wickedkitten

poet123 wrote: »

The person involved, but when they say;

"around 11pm i had a headache and went to put some tiisue in my ears which helped a bit."

It would not be surprising if others felt that trying a more effective remedy could have been tried first, or even at all. And then perhaps ask themselves honestly whether if it had been their bf's wedding they would not have hoped their OH would have at least attempted to take a simple painkiller.

She didn't stick the tissue in her ears because of the headache, she stuck them in her ears because the music was too loud. Even if she had taken a painkiller the music still would have been a problem

athina_2

Hmm, well something I should have pointed out earlier is he was the one who told me to put tissue in my ear to block the noise. It worked for about two hours but the music was well above night club levels, taking a guess I think it was around 130-140 decibels in a small Room measuring 10m by 20m. The only way to get away from it was outside and as I said earlier, I stood 10m away outside and could still clearly hear the music and that was with the tissue in my ears! Paracetomal is not the answer for a solution like that.

If I should have stayed until the end when I really didn't want to, does that include staying in that situation until 3/4/5am when 11pm was the time I really wanted to go?

euronorris

Person_one wrote: »

5am? There was really no need for you to be such a martyr, I doubt that the departure of the best man's wife a few hours earlier than expected would have ruined anybody's evening, even your husband's.

OP certainly didn't make him choose, she asked him to take 5 minutes to call her a taxi then he could have gone right back to having fun at the party.

I'm sure no one would've minded (except maybe the OP's husband).

I was chief bridesmaid at my sisters wedding, but I was sooo ill on the day. I was fighting off flu I think, had been sick countless times, could barely stop sneezing and coughing during the ceremony etc (thank goodness my sister paid for a makeup artist cos I looked like death that morning!).

I lasted until 8pm, when the cake was cut and they started their first dance, before I had to call it a day and go to bed. My sister understood completely. If she can understand that, I don't see why the OP's husband had such a problem with her leaving early. Is he not able to enjoy himself without her? Why does she HAVE to be there with him?

[Deleted User]

athina wrote: »

Hmm, well something I should have pointed out earlier is he was the one who told me to put tissue in my ear to block the noise. It worked for about two hours but the music was well above night club levels, taking a guess I think it was around 130-140 decibels in a small Room measuring 10m by 20m. The only way to get away from it was outside and as I said earlier, I stood 10m away outside and could still clearly hear the music and that was with the tissue in my ears! Paracetomal is not the answer for a solution like that.

If I should have stayed until the end when I really didn't want to, does that include staying in that situation until 3/4/5am when 11pm was the time I really wanted to go?

A jet plane, taking off, 100m from you, would be 130db.
If someone fired a shotgun next to your ear, it would be 140db.

I think you may be exaggerating on this a little.

I would have been very, very disappointed if my best man had gone home early at my wedding. Was there no where you could have gone to sit out the rest of the evening and let your 'headache' calm down?

Is there a female equivalent of 'man-ning up'? What if this was your best friend's wedding? Would you be willing to go home early because your bloke had a headache?