huge row with husband over leaving wedding early

pinkclouds

Just for the record, I think the OP's husband was utterly ridiculous - I have left events early on my own and my husband has stayed behind and no one has considered this to be socially abnormal. I also agree that the groom's brother was selfish - he should have sent his wife home with their 1 year old baby at a decent time in the evening. It would never occur to my husband to tell me to hang around until 1 am with our 2 little ones - we (me and the kids) would have long since gone home, probably leaving him behind to finish the night on his own.

Exactly why would anyone insist that an ill woman and a mom with a 12 month old *and* the 12 month old infant should sit up all night until the small hours of the morning??

Lotus-eater

I'm guessing that it's a cultural thing going on here.

spicyprawn

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Blimey. At 18 and 19 I was travelling and living alone in places I didn't know!

Well im a hermit and still am at 24

Beetlemama

onlyroz wrote: »

I doubt that you "ruined the wedding" - most likely the happy couple would have been too wrapped up in themselves to even notice.

My mother didn't even notice that my sister wasn't at her wedding party, she sulked in her hotel room all evening.

You didn't ruin their wedding, what you did was spoil his fun. Tough shoot I say. My DH would have carried me home if I'd said I was ill (don't worry, he has other faults, just as I do, but in this case he'd have come through, lol), don't feel bad, you didn't do anything wrong, he needs to grow up.

BugglyB

pinkclouds wrote: »

Just for the record, I think the OP's husband was utterly ridiculous - I have left events early on my own and my husband has stayed behind and no one has considered this to be socially abnormal. I also agree that the groom's brother was selfish - he should have sent his wife home with their 1 year old baby at a decent time in the evening. It would never occur to my husband to tell me to hang around until 1 am with our 2 little ones - we (me and the kids) would have long since gone home, probably leaving him behind to finish the night on his own.

Exactly why would anyone insist that an ill woman and a mom with a 12 month old *and* the 12 month old infant should sit up all night until the small hours of the morning??

The groom's brother should have sent his wife home? :eek:

delain

I don't think that was meant the way it sounded BugglyB!

FWIW my OH knows I'm not a 'party until 2am' person and when we've been out to things and the LO's have got tired and grotty, or I just want to go home with them, I do so with his blessing, and he stays with mine.

I suppose people feel that weddings are different, and 'best man' and all that, but if my OH was in the OP's OH's shoes he'd have had no problem with me going back by myself (I suppose it helps that he knows what a dragon I am if I don't get my sleep ) and I do think the OP's OH was being unreasonable.

Any

I also do think there is a cultural thing going on...

Why would otherwise one need someone elses blessing to leave the part??? And asking a groom's brother about his wife???

Because if not, then the OP needs to grow up, I am sure the reception would have called taxi for her, she didn't need her husband to call it. I also do think that walking around with tissue in ones eares is a bit... well.... OTT.

And if it is cultural thing - well OP, it is difficult to judge then.

neverdespairgirl

[Deleted User] wrote:

Hi,



eh, upper arm flab,

Thanks...........

Birdy12

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Blimey. At 18 and 19 I was travelling and living alone in places I didn't know!

Same here, although 21 and travelling with a pal.

I'll never forget coming out of some train station in (then) Czechoslovakia and man came up to us. 'Need somwhere to stay?' We nodded (do you think the backpacks gave us away?). 'Follow me then', he said.

He led us through some back streets, finally arriving at a block of flats where he took us into a particular flat. Very nice actually and, luckily, he didn't lock the door behind him and it wasn't full of blokes all looking for a 'good time'.

To this day, I've never told my mother about it...

pinkclouds

BugglyB wrote: »

The groom's brother should have sent his wife home? :eek:

Or to the hotel or wherever they were staying. One parent needs to look after the baby and, at 12 months old, I'd expect it to be the mother. Even if she isn't breastfeeding, I'd still expect her to be the primary care-giver. I suppose if the little one was bottle-fed then the father might be the primary care-giver. However, it was his brother's wedding so I'd expect that the groom's brother would want to stay at the reception for as long as possible. Thus, either way, it should be the mom going back to the hotel (or wherever) with the baby.

Take the baby to the wedding. Bring them to the start of the reception so they can see everyone and, probably, be cooed over by friends/relatives. But let them keep their regular hours as much as possible and send them home to their quiet, comfy beds at a decent hour. *shrugs* I've deleted quite a lot of what I wrote. I don't exactly want to offend as such but I feel I must say *something* about lengthy parties attended by people who may be drinking alcohol rather freely and the appropriateness of young kids attending them for long periods of time. Teens are different. Toddlers are just too young.