huge row with husband over leaving wedding early

Torry_Quine

Errata wrote: »

It's on all the wedding sites, wedding planning sites and millions of google sites.

That's a modern idea and just to make people think of all the 'essentials' they must have.

Person_one wrote: »

Wedding sites and so on exist to get people all over excited and over invested in weddings so that they'll take them far too seriously and spend silly amounts of money.

Well said.

worried_jim

Teenie_D wrote: »

Think you missed out a 3rd thing which [STRIKE]could[/STRIKE] probably will happen, the bloke feels dead horny but having drunk all those sambucas, can't erm deliver the goods :D

Been there, done it (or not).

JBD

Errata wrote: »

It's on all the wedding sites, wedding planning sites and millions of google sites.

You do know that it isn't the 'law' though?
There is no law regarding best men. They aren't an essential part of the wedding. The only essential roles are the bride, the groom, the registrar/priest and the witnesses. Therefore there are no obligations regarding the best man, bridesmaids or guests.

POPPYOSCAR

Person_one wrote: »

Wedding sites and so on exist to get people all over excited and over invested in weddings so that they'll take them far too seriously and spend silly amounts of money.

Exactly!

What is the first rule of advertising? - 'Create a need'.

Errata

JBD wrote: »

You do know that it isn't the 'law' though?
There is no law regarding best men. They aren't an essential part of the wedding. The only essential roles are the bride, the groom, the registrar/priest and the witnesses. Therefore there are no obligations regarding the best man, bridesmaids or guests.

No law? Good grief, thanks for telling me.
If there is a best man, there are rules of etiquette which define his role. The fact that many don't bother with them doesn't mean they don't exist.

Brighton_belle

Yup, we got married 2 weeks ago and didn't even have a best man "shock horror". All our guests appear to have coped with getting home:D.
I would have been shocked if any of our guests had not left if they felt ill or exhausted. Nothing, but nothing or nobody could have spoilt our wedding celebration by leaving early - we were so happy to be married, end of. Anything else was happy window dressing.

I simply cannot understand this belief by some that the wife of a best man has a duty to stay up all night. In the reverse situation, I would never dream of putting my DH though that if i was bridesmaid etc and he was shattered, without a headache, let alone with one.

Torry_Quine

Errata wrote: »

No law? Good grief, thanks for telling me.
If there is a best man, there are rules of etiquette which define his role. The fact that many don't bother with them doesn't mean they don't exist.

The role of a best man is supporting the groom though and has nothing to do with helping other guests with arrangements at the end of the night.

worried_jim

RuthnJasper wrote: »

worried_jim wrote: »

Yes please! But if a cash bar, then I'll buy you one in return. I am young, single and gorgeous - but NOT a sponger - so I don't use "what I've got" to get free stuff (apart from a smile and a bit of flirting maybe)!

Also, casting no aspersions here, if I get bored I promise I won't repeatedly whine in your ear (whilst sticking paper in mine) and march outside to sit in a stroppy state of embarrassing, attention-seeking, self-martyrdom.

x

The more you type, the more attractive you become. After a few drinks you won't be able to drag me away from the dance floor in reality.

JBD

Errata wrote: »

No law? Good grief, thanks for telling me.
If there is a best man, there are rules of etiquette which define his role. The fact that many don't bother with them doesn't mean they don't exist.

'Rules of ettiquette' aren't universal though. Just because they may be written in a book somewhere [or on a wedding website] doesn't mean that they have to be followed. Why should they be?People have very different ideas on what the role of a best man should be so 'rules of ettiquette' are not an authority, any more than the bible is.

Person_one

JBD wrote: »

'Rules of ettiquette' aren't universal though. Just because they may be written in a book somewhere [or on a wdding website] doesn't mean that they have to be followed. Why should they be?People have very different ideas on what the role of a best man should be so 'rules of ettiquette' are not an authority, any more than the bible is.

Not to mention there is no rule of etiquette written anywhere that states the best man's wife must remain at the wedding until the last guest leaves no matter how she's feeling.

I'd hazard a guess that Debrett's has very little to say about the role of the best man's wife.