huge row with husband over leaving wedding early

athina_2

Yes, thank you it's all fine now . We have another wedding this Sunday but I know the venue closes at 12am so this one shouldn't be a problem

euronorris

Person_one wrote: »

You must have the nicest migraines ever if you could 'put up with it' at a wedding at 1am, that's certainly not typical.

Migraines leave me talking to the big white telephone, so I would be, for all intents and purposes, absent anyway if a migraine came on.

Person_one

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Chuck up in the bogs, take another couple of painkillers and get on with it, don't you?

Um, no.

Chuck up in the bogs, stumble around for a bit trying to find a safe place to sit despite having no vision or balance and pins and needles down one side, try to find the safest way to get home, spend 2 or 3 hours sobbing quietly with ice packs on my head in a darkened room then sleep for 6 hours or so and wake up exhausted and drained with residual minor headache. No painkiller has ever had an effect, the only chance I have is eating carbs and drinking a very very strong coffee at the very first sign if I catch it in time.

That's the thing about headaches and migraines, they're completely undefinable. The OP could have had a minor irritation of a headache or she could have had the kind I get as a symptom of my migraines which leave you incapable of coherent thought. You can't apply your own experiences to everybody else.

I agree with Tish completely though, if I'm having a party I don't want people feeling that they have to 'power through' it, I don't invite my friends to things to watch them suffer, I'm sure most couples getting married don't either.

euronorris

I tell you what, if any bride or groom expected me to stay at their wedding when I was ill, I doubt I'd continue that friendship for much longer.

As if my early departure would ruin their big day? Oh please! Their big day is NOT about me! It's about them. Shouldn't they be feeling so happy and loved up that everyone and everthing else seems to melt away? If not, then I'd say there was far too much emphasis on the event, rather than the purpose of the day.

Oh, and painkillers are useless for my migraines, unless I take them when I see the zigzaggy lines in my eyes. Unfortunately, sometimes I am just not able to get to some painkillers on time, or it comes on during my sleep and the first I know about it is being woken up by the pain!

Big_Alf

I'm being very presumptious here and may be totally off the mark, but even from the small amount of information given I cant help get the feeling there may be a passive agressive issue here.

During an event where high running emotions are mixed with alcohol, little things are always going to be blown out of proprtion. If you were anything other than a teddy bear filled with candy floss during the party then your husband will immediately take the view that you 'had a gob on all night'.

Was this the first time you had met many of the people present? If so he was probably wanting to show off what a great wife he had. Even though the circumstances were out of your control (loud music), showing the smallest glimpse of discontent is really going to get his back up and eventually lead to escalation.

This is talking from experience as I have been in similar situations several times.

Hope I have grown out of it now though!

fluffnutter

Hmm, a controlling husband and a passive-aggressive wife. I suspect this latest incident is one of many.