what are the best value dating sites?

Scotty1.7

Good luck lufcgirl

Much agreed a date over agame of pool or soemthing else is much better

And movies I think area big no no for a first date- yoru ment to get to know each other and how can you do that in silance

SailorSam

I only use PoF, i know it gets a lot of criticism but they do advertise themselves as having the largest number of users, which i think i believe, so the chances are that they'll be more active members in any one area.
A few posters have said about how annoying it is to have written a message and not know if the recipient has left the site months before, i don't know about other sites but what i've done sometimes on PoF is add someone to my favourites, you can then see the last time they logged on.

newcook

SailorSam wrote: »

I only use PoF, i know it gets a lot of criticism but they do advertise themselves as having the largest number of users, which i think i believe, so the chances are that they'll be more active members in any one area.
A few posters have said about how annoying it is to have written a message and not know if the recipient has left the site months before, i don't know about other sites but what i've done sometimes on PoF is add someone to my favourites, you can then see the last time they logged on.

with POF on the search page it also shows roughly when they were last online (I think it shows within the last hour, today, the lasy 3 days, this week, the last 30 days and 30 days or longer).
I hate it when people add you as their favourite but they haven't sent a message, you dont know them and you havent made contact with them - I dont even want to think of why someone would do that...

pea-benn

you can also see who's online on Lovestruck and when they last logged on. My messages that haven't been read are from people who are 'active' on the site. My theory is that they are just looking and not paid up. Also, if you pay to be an Elite member then non-paid up members can message you for free. Maybe there are lots of girls with this type of membership so the guys don't need to pay up?! I just can't see why you'd be on a site and not read messages. I'm not talking about replying - just reading or even deleting!

As for favourites, I use this quite a lot. If I'm not in the mood for writing a message I 'favourite' them with a view to messaging them another day. That's not wierd is it?!!

zoesmummy_2006

I've read this thread with interest this avo.

Ive been single 2 years since my ex husband left, i had a couple of dates last year with a gorgeous young lad, but it never went anywhere, i think he was just too young and i was too worried what people (mainly his family!!) would say.

Im now finally divorced and feel ready to "get back out there" on the dating scene but OMG its hard!!!! All of my friends are married/settled/have kids etc, so I dont get out like i did when i was younger. We do try and have a big girlie night out probably once every 3 months, and get together for a curry and few glasses wine in a pub every month.

I went out last weekend for my birthday/divorce celebrations and seriously they're all soooooo young!!! There was a very cute barman but he was that busy I couldnt catch his eye or anything to even try and flirt-not that i know how to anymore, unless its someone i know, then i can flirt for britain!! I was with my ex for nearly 10 years and have 2 kids-i wasnt expecting to be having to go through flirting and dating again lol. Even my mates feel sorry for me at the thought of dating.

Today i've had 3 people ask me why im still single, one of them being a gorgeous bloke whom i've fancied for years but he's now married with a baby on the way, and they reckon there must be something wrong with the blokes around here if they're not beating my door down to take me out. Im think im ok looking (everyone else says im gorgeous but i really dont think i am), i've got a pretty good figure for 2 kids, but i just really lack confidence, more so since my ex left me and shacked up with the stereotypical younger model.

I signed up to POF a few months back and added a couple of photos & did the whole profile bit, and was inundated with messages from guys, mostly the 'looking for fun' kind and i could tell they hadnt read my profile and it left me feeling a bit weird. I havent been on in a while, maybe i should have another nosy.

Another problem i have is that the guys i do seem to attract are already taken!!!! Not good!!!

oh well I shall keep fishing and hope that my mr right appears sometime soon xx

Scotty1.7

Good luck lass- It ain't easy for either side it.

I will say onething, it seems easier as a girl cause you get the guys messaging you, allowing you to decide what your after

SailorSam

newcook wrote: »

with POF on the search page it also shows roughly when they were last online (I think it shows within the last hour, today, the lasy 3 days, this week, the last 30 days and 30 days or longer).
I hate it when people add you as their favourite but they haven't sent a message, you dont know them and you havent made contact with them - I dont even want to think of why someone would do that...

Where do i find that 3 to 30 days.
When i click 'message sent' you can see if people have logged on up to 24hrs but after that it's just blank.
I don't put people on 'Favs' as a matter of course, i understand what you mean about that being cheeky, but if i'd sent a message and a week or so later they hadn't logged on, i may then put them as a fav just to see are they still 'alive' on the site. If i found the last time they'd logged on was 6mths ago i'd look for someone else to message. I only do one at a time.

There_Goes_Trouble

zoesmummy_2006 wrote: »

I signed up to POF a few months back and added a couple of photos & did the whole profile bit, and was inundated with messages from guys, mostly the 'looking for fun' kind and i could tell they hadnt read my profile and it left me feeling a bit weird.

You do get past this, but it does feel weird to start with. You just need to develop a thicker skin.

oh well I shall keep fishing and hope that my mr right appears sometime soon xx

Good luck!!!!!

There_Goes_Trouble

newcook wrote: »

I hate it when people add you as their favourite but they haven't sent a message, you dont know them and you havent made contact with them - I dont even want to think of why someone would do that...

I do this (sorry). It's usually for a reason.

One, I may be browsing on my phone but it takes me too long to type a message on there so I'll put someone in my favourites to look at properly and send a message to when I'm next at the computer. Sometimes I then forget or change my mind.

Two, sometimes I put someone in my favourites to kind of test the water... if they then put me in their favourites I know there's a glimmer of a chance so I'll be brave and send a message.

Three, I do still get a bit nervous of making the first move, so if I put someone in my favourites then they know I'm interested, and they might message me first which saves me having to muster my courage to do it.

Four, I often need time to think through what I want to say in a message, so I'll put someone in my favourites so I can find them again when I'm ready to write to them.

Five, occasionally there's someone I have absolutely nothing in common with but that my mate might like, so I'll save to favourites so I can show her at work the next day.

Lady_Inversneckie

Hi, to all of you looking for love...

I thought I would share my experiences.

I joined POF 3/4 years ago and met a lovely man who I went out with for 1 year and 9 months. He had emotional problems that were taking over his life but wouldn't seek help.
I gave myself 6 months off and ventured back onto POF sometime in July this year.
I have an eight year old and when she goes to bed, I am sometimes bored with tv etc. I hoped to use POF for a chat.
My profile reads "Friends" but indicates I am open to romance.
POF is not what it was 3/4 years ago..
I've never been offered so many one night stands, even though my profile states
Must not have messaged users looking for intimate encounters or sex.
Must not be looking for Other Relationship
Must not be looking for Intimate Encounter
Must not be looking for Activity Partner.

You can select any of the above to show on your profile.

My profile also states that I am happy to chat but remember you are chatting to a lady.

The one night stand boys obviously cannot read. :-)

I chatted to a guy for maybe two weeks, we were texting and then one day I came down a side street in my car where I live and gave way to the guy and his live-in girlfriend (I didn't know this at the time) as they crossed the road.
I confronted him online and he said his relationship was dead, no love making & they didn't talk anymore. I told him to talk to his girlfriend and not me. I blocked him.

I spoke to another guy, we started to chat as I advised, his profile was a tad negative. We chatted for maybe three weeks, he then asked "when was he going to get into my panties!!!"
Next!

Chatted to another guy, he seemed alright, we texted, we spoke on the phone, he texted could he phone me the following night - I said sure........ I didn't hear from him again.
Next!

Chatted to another guy, who wasn't online much. He had a new business. Our first chat online was for about 2 and a half hours. After our first chat he would email maybe every three weeks (I didn't put my life on hold) He then went to emailing every day, he asked "Would you like to meet for a coffee Mary?"
My reply was "Off with his head" Who is Mary?
You guest it, it wasn't me........
Next!

I have emailed guys before on pof and no reply from them. Which I think is ignorant.

To be truthful. I was getting fed up.......... So I joined "Match" and was offered buy one month, get one free. So I did.
In two months I spoke to maybe 5 guys, one shone through. Emailed back and fore, several times in a day over maybe a week and then nothing...........
I emailed maybe three, no reply.
I did maybe three quizes and asked for feedback - no reply.
I had well over two hundred guys look at my profile but no one emails.
I was well fed up by the end of my two months, which was last week. I've suspended my account with Match. I was all for giving up when I found this thread. :-)
Those that are looking on here seem to have the same hassles. It's a comfort to me :-)

I'm still on pof but I dont find it as friendly as it was 3/4 years ago. One thing that is definitily required is a Thick Skin.

All good fun huh :-)


Amanda