what are the best value dating sites?

vintagebrighton

What I will say is just take it as it comes.......... I met my OH on ok cupid but we talked lots on IM before meeting up and it was never meant to be a serious relationship so we were both chatting and meeting others at the same time. There was no expectation, things just developed. Plus, its always nice to meet new people even when some of them turn out to be weird! In fact my OH is probably the weirdest person I met online but that's not a bad thing Just have fun - be aware of possible problems but don't let it colour everything..... who knows what could happen!

JennyP

Alternatives to internet dating: Spice, Intervarsity, running clubs, gyms, other sporty type clubs, Ramblers Association, Ceroc dancing, salsa dancing, church, Buddhist sanghas, Quaker meetings, political meetings, RSPB local clubs, photography clubs....

I think the thing is that if you go to the same things every week, ok, you get to know people and make friends but you might not meet the one. If you spread yourself a bit more thinly and go to as many different things as possible, you're more likely to!

And not looking seems to work. Somehow, if I'm so absorbed in the activity itself, the men around seem to find me more attractive than when I'm "on the hunt"!!! Perhaps I shouldn't have owned up to the fact that I'm sometimes on the hunt....makes me sound like one of those female spiders that eats her mate afterwards!

becky170

Well after reading the thread (and being nagged by my friends) I've decided to give internet dating another go and have signed up for match. I'll let you know how I get on. I do agree that it is my 'last resort' as I don't seem to meet any new guys through work or friends. I am slightly ashamed about it though, and I know my parents disapprove about internet dating, but I just want to keep my options open.

Scotty1.7

Good luck becky- And I think I say for the majority of us in this thread, you can always in-box us if you want to.

I think those that say its a social lepper sort of place are really out of order- I jopined like someone else has said, almost niavely it seems in the hope that I would meet the one.

I haven't and I guess the longer its gone the more down trodden I have sometimes felt that It won't happen.

I'm now at the point were I sometimes feel that 90% of the ladies/girls on the likes of POF really aren't on there for a relationship or anything at all, its just a 'in thing as all my friends are doing it'

Thats not to not aimed at those who are on here who've written that- Thats the impression I have had from the local girls on POF

I even e-mailed POF's admin and asked what's the point to a profile when 99% of people your message don't look at it!? I also asked him for his proof that 1 in 3 messages get a response.

All I got back was a link to the profile review board on the POF forum and a one line answer of that was based on data from 2002

My housemate, who is a girl, is on there, and because she has the word 'fun' on her profile, virtually every date I have heard her go on has ended up with them thinking they are going to get 'laid' with her.

Personally I think girls are to busy looking for the 'Brad Pitt' or who ever the 'fittest' guy at the time is based on there magazines. And I now avoid like the plague any girls profile who says ' I think personality is more important then looks'- If the type that, there lying, and are normally- not always, but normally the most selfish people you will know.

Now I know alot of the girls who have posted on this thread will post up that this isn't true, and they don't act like that or think like that etc etc. So before you post I have a challenge for you- How many times have you got a message, and ignored it because you made a snap decision you didn't like them???

And for those who reply with, there has to be some attraction, I agree, but there is a post some on here I have read, were some has said she didn't like the person at first, but it grew into something and now she does.

I think some people expect on-line dating to be like shopping, you go in, you find what you want you leave with it.

It needs to be viewed as basically a school playground sort of thing, your first day, you knew no one and you had to start talking with people and you get to know folk.

Ladyhawk

Scotty1.7 wrote: »

Now I know alot of the girls who have posted on this thread will post up that this isn't true, and they don't act like that or think like that etc etc. So before you post I have a challenge for you- How many times have you got a message, and ignored it because you made a snap decision you didn't like them???

And for those who reply with, there has to be some attraction, I agree, but there is a post some on here I have read, were some has said she didn't like the person at first, but it grew into something and now she does.

I think some people expect on-line dating to be like shopping, you go in, you find what you want you leave with it.

I think you might have a point here Scotty. I have made snap decisions based on what my ideal man would be - ie non-smoker and without kids. If I met a smoker with kids in R/L and there was a spark then I would pursue it. I just didn' want to "waste" my time on someone... Does that make me a puddle? probably.

There_Goes_Trouble

Scotty1.7 wrote: »

Good luck becky- And I think I say for the majority of us in this thread, you can always in-box us if you want to.

Absolutely.

I think those that say its a social lepper sort of place are really out of order- I jopined like someone else has said, almost niavely it seems in the hope that I would meet the one.

I haven't and I guess the longer its gone the more down trodden I have sometimes felt that It won't happen.

True for me too. I can get very down about it sometimes (you may have noticed!! - sorry)

Personally I think girls are to busy looking for the 'Brad Pitt' or who ever the 'fittest' guy at the time is based on there magazines.

Same of blokes too though, I read one this morning who said "...and if you happen to look like Kelly Brookes so much the better"

And I now avoid like the plague any girls profile who says ' I think personality is more important then looks'- If the type that, there lying, and are normally- not always, but normally the most selfish people you will know.

I think most people who say that think it's what other people want to hear, but actually it just means that I know they're lying. Of course looks are important! I'm no great looker myself but I'm not going to date someone who I find unattractive. And if that makes me shallow then so be it.

Now I know alot of the girls who have posted on this thread will post up that this isn't true, and they don't act like that or think like that etc etc. So before you post I have a challenge for you- How many times have you got a message, and ignored it because you made a snap decision you didn't like them???

I always read their profile, but yes I make snap decisions. I do however always reply unless they've only sent a one word message!

And for those who reply with, there has to be some attraction, I agree, but there is a post some on here I have read, were some has said she didn't like the person at first, but it grew into something and now she does.

This is part of my problem I think because it's exactly how I need things to work yet it can't happen on a dating site. I have several friends who have said it's how it happened for them but all of them were in daily contact with the person at work so had chance to get to know the person with no pressures of being on a date. They didn't date until after they knew they liked each other. It's the other way round with internet dating in that you date to see if you like each other and you really need to have a good idea by the end of date one if you want date two to happen or not!

I think some people expect on-line dating to be like shopping, you go in, you find what you want you leave with it.

I do call it 'boy shopping' *ashamed of self*

It needs to be viewed as basically a school playground sort of thing, your first day, you knew no one and you had to start talking with people and you get to know folk.

But how do you know who to talk to? I just spent a month talking to a guy online, yet within 5 mins of meeting him he weirded me out with his body language! Maybe I was just unlucky that I didn't filter him out soon enough.

*sigh* it really shouldn't be this difficult, although I'm thinking it's me that's the problem, not everyone else like I thought... LOL!!

Ladyhawk

There_Goes_Trouble wrote: »

*sigh* it really shouldn't be this difficult, although I'm thinking it's me that's the problem, not everyone else like I thought... LOL!!

Not that I know you, but am sure that there is nothing wrong with you. One day our princes will come... I think they are too busy slaying dragons at the moment and haven't recieved the message that we are losing patience with them:)

charliemaine1bee

Met my husband on friends reunited dating website..thought it was lovely and not like the usual perv meat market ..x

deb68_2

so before the internet how on earth did people meet?
going for walks,going the pub,dancing,
going the pics meeting thro friends,at work by chance
wasnt it so much nicer then

Scotty1.7

There_Goes_Trouble wrote: »

*sigh* it really shouldn't be this difficult, although I'm thinking it's me that's the problem, not everyone else like I thought... LOL!!

It shouldn't be this difficult

I should add by the way I apologise if that post upset anyone.