Struggling with relationship *maybe sensitive*

candygirl

mikeandrach wrote: »

i get there is an issue here etc etc ok, but as a male i find these replies interesting. if a male had mase the original comments, i cant help thinking the replies would have been very different......................................... or am i being cynical?

That's already been discussed way back in the thread:D:D

mikeandrach_2

ok, being a typical male i read page 1 then the last page. usually the stuuff in the middle is just waffle. i will now sit quietly in my corner, thanks :-)

candygirl

mikeandrach wrote: »

ok, being a typical male i read page 1 then the last page. usually the stuuff in the middle is just waffle. i will now sit quietly in my corner, thanks :-)

lol have a proper read through like a good boy;):D

ktb

'gay & in denial' would possibly still manifest in sexual arousal and 'servicing' himself but just to homosexual stimulus - unless it was extremely repressed I suppose. Is there a chance this is happening without your knowledge or do you 100% believe him when he tells you he doesn't? Does he get 'morning glory'? Not getting that is obviously an indicator for erectile dysfunction, but if they do and are having sexual issues then it signals psychological reasons rather than anything physical. Not getting it could perhaps indicate a testosterone issue or something? Just a thought.

lostinrates

candygirl wrote: »

The Mr Boring I went out with last year didn't even like BJ's:eek::eek::eek:Truly weird and frigid:eek::eek::eek:

actually, I don't think that's as uncommon as people think.

Its perfectly possible to change someone's mind but I don't think its fair to say someone is weird or frigid because they don't like one particular sexual act.

candygirl

lostinrates wrote: »

actually, I don't think that's as uncommon as people think.

Its perfectly possible to change someone's mind but I don't think its fair to say someone is weird or frigid because they don't like one particular sexual act.

He didn't like sex at all tho hun, that's why we finished.I couldn't cope with it:o:o

Wonder_Womble

I haven't read the full 7 pages so I'm probably just repeating what has already been said, but ....

jtr2803 wrote: »

The hard part is that apart from this issue he is very good to me, don't get me wrong we have our moments like most people but he buys me flowes, cooks me dinner, calls me to tell me he loves me, shows me lots of affection - cuddles, kisses, back rubs etc but just not sex!

jtr2803 wrote: »

we have nice holidays, we are very openly affectionate towards each other and we are always laughing.

I love him like I have never loved anyone else in my entire life and I love waking up with him every day and coming home to him, I still hope it is him who has text me when my phone beeps and everything I want to do in my future, I want to do with him.

If you had a choice, would you choose to have the relationship / boyfriend you have described above, with the lack of regular sex? Or would you choose a bloke who was always up for a bit hanky panky, but showed you little affection?

You say there is a lack of intimacy in your relationship, but your boyfriend is intimate with you in other ways, just not through having sex.

If your boyfriend wanted more sex with you then he would be the ideal fella, but unfortunately it is highly unlikely that anything is going to change in that department. Crying, shouting, pleading, demanding, begging etc will probably only make the situation worse. I'm sure he already feels awful because of his lack of drive and if he could change it he would.

Only you know if you can live with the lack of sex, and accept him just the way he is, as you are not going to be able to change the situation.

Astara

I think you need to bring up going to the doctor again. It could be low testosterone as that affects sex drive and drive in general, low mood etc If he doesn't want to go to his doctor you could try a private hormone clinic and even go together. Have a look at https://www.holisticmedical.co.uk as they prescribe bio-identical testosterone. This is important to you and it won't go away and there could be a relatively simple solution.

candygirl

Just wondering if you've made any progress OP?Hope you're ok hun:A