at my wits end and hit rock bottom!!

Brettson

Hi, just wanted to say I've read your thread and am so glad you've taken the first steps to sorting it all out.
I'm new on here and am overwhelmed by how wonderful and supportive everyone is.
stay strong xx

turbo.jet

scared_and_alone wrote: »

i hope no one on here hates me too much or is angry with me, trust me i do feel bad and i really am a good person who has just made some wrong decisions

Hi,

First of all let me address this point. We are here to support you, give you advice and encourage you on the road to sorting out your problems. Don't waste any time worrying that we will hate you!

If you read through other people's diaries you will see that a lot of people have been in a much worse situation than yourself so there is no need to beat yourself up quite so much. I'm not looking for you to explain why you are here! I'm telling you - there's no need so stop it!

How about you post an interim SOA with your current benefits, or an estimate of your new benefits so we can start to be helpful.

Harming yourself is never the answer to anything, let alone debt. Its a long term solution to a short term problem. Just don't let the thoughts exist. When they crop up, just start thinking about what it will feel like to tackle your debt instead.

You have never defaulted, this is a GREAT thing. If you end up on a DMP you might get some defaults on your file, but that's ok because they only last 6 years and you don't want more credit anyway.

All in all, from what I've read so far your situation is tackle-able with our help and support.

Get the SOA done for us though.

Good luck!

turbo.jet

PS if you told the receptionist at the doctors what you were thinking I'm sure you'd be seen sooner than the 21st.

scared_and_alone

hi Turbo

thank you for your post

im not feeling like ending it all any more as i know there is a way out of this mess now...i guess when you have a 'lightbulb' moment while suffering depression irrational thoughts can take over but i am going to get in touch with the doc again to see if i can see him sooner

the CCCS have worked out a budget with me with their recommended living costs so as soon as i receive it i will definately post a SOA as i know there will be areas i can save on and get debt free quicker

i think my low mood has been replaced with determination now and by hitting rock bottom i now realise that from today i will NEVER be in this situation with debt again

5th October 2011 is a fresh start for me, not only with money but also with dealing with my depression

I CAN DO IT AND I WILL!

xx

elsiepac

Hi scared

I just wanted to say congratulations on coming such a long way in so short a time. The obstacles you've overcome to be able to get yourself in a place to deal with this are phenomenal, and you should be really proud of yourself. I've recently been diagnosed with depression, so I feel I understand when you say about everything seeming like a bigger issue than it is. It's easy to become very overwhelmed very quickly. Please keep us updated, and good luck - you're in the right place

LC xxx

scared_and_alone

thanks Elsie

im not looking for sympathy by any means but losing my Mum has had a huge impact on my life even a couple of years down the line..i realise this now and should never have been in a hurry to think i was strong again

i guess when dealing with mental health problems we still feel there is some sort of stigma attached until we realise this isnt the case any more

i hope youre feeling better now that youre dealing with it too

much love xx

Northern_Lassy

Hello, nice to have you back, I was wondering how you were xx
Well done on your progress so far, everything feels a hundred times harder when you have depression and you are doing really well.
I agree about trying to get to the doctors asap (I know it can be tricky getting past the receptionist!) but the sooner you get an appointment, the sooner you will start getting better and every other problem will be easier to tackle.
I really sympathise with your illness and losing your Mum, the big trigger for me was when my son was a baby and we thought he might have a condition which could have left him brain damaged...It is so difficult when your sadness is brought about by something which you cannot control x My son is now 15 and though he has dyspraxia, through sheer grit and determination won himself a place at the local Grammar School and is on course for A*s in most of his GCSE subjects (though he struggles to tie his shoelaces!!?)
Things do get better, you WILL get better, you are doing really well and I am very proud of you xx

carer_adrian

Hey Scared and alone initially you have done the first big thing by coming on here and talking to people about your worries Money saving Expert is awesome the people are equally awesome to. My Depression hit an all time low in June 2011 and i simply had enough The best thing i ever done was to go to the doctor and get their support they listened to me and they suggested what the best alternatives to help is i am currently on medication i am waiting for counselling but i also found other things that helped cutting down on alcohol healthy eating and try and get a good nights sleep. My Dmp is with Christians Against Poverty you dont have to be a christian to join or go to church they are simply there to help you with your debts The thing that i like about them is you can save money with them they calculate everything for you and they will let you know how much you have to pay it is entirely up to you but i just want to say good luck and i will be reading your diary with interest

Savvy_sewing

Glad your feeling better and taken those first steps. Push to see another doctor in the practise if you can see someone earlier?
Take care
Moo

scared_and_alone

hi, i hope everyone is having a good weekend...

just wanted to update a little as i know its been a few days again since i logged in

ive been to see my gp and am back on medication for depression and my pack from the CCCS has arrived so over the next few days i will get all of my paperwork together and get it sent back to them

still struggling a bit but i suppose the meds take time to work, just feel a bit fuzzy right now

will keep in touch and post more regularly when i feel a bit clearer

sorry ive been a bit rubbish at it so far but do appreciate all the words ive received on here

xx