I'm sort of homeless. Need money NOW.

merlin68

Have you claimed DLA for your illness? or even ESA?. Your attitude is very much like my friend's son who has Asperger's syndrome.
His very self opiniated and annoying.

sukysue

I am sorry you feel so upset about your situation but can't you put yourself in their position and see it from their side. I can't really blame them over the garlic thing as I really hate the smell of it. It's so repulsive to me I never cook with it or buy anything containing it as I hate it so much so I can see where they are coming from . I wonder if they think you are cooking with it to purposely annoy them? Haven't you anyone else like siblings you can ask their opinoins about this. It's also time for a heart to heart talk with your parents too . They may seem as if they don't like you but I am sure it's just the heat of the moment talking, try and reach a compromise amicably with them you have nothing to lose. Good Luck.

Vanille_2

rising_from_the_ashes wrote: »

Do you ever offer to do something?

When their friends came round and they were catching up, did it ever occur to you to say "would anyone like a cup of tea or coffee"?

Sorry, I get where you're coming from but you are coming across as being very selfish and childish - whatever they are expecting/demanding or anything else, your parents are putting a roof over your head and you should be grateful for that and put up with it until you are in a position to move out.

Actually I do offer to, sometimes. It doesn't do much good though. They don't notice it.

Well I do put up with it, but today it's just gone over the edge. I can't believe that out of all of these people posting here, only one person seems to think it's a bit unreasonable for parents to make me stop eating garlic, because it "oozes through my pores and I smell".

CH27 wrote: »

I see why your parents think you leaving is for the best.

Another pointless comment. Would you care to expand on why?

Butti wrote: »

Vanille,
You clearly have a somewhat problematic relationship with your mother which seems to based on an issue of respect. She probably has an issue of respect for herself and hence the problem of how she talks to you.

I think it is good for you to get up early and to focus on finishing your coursework (I am on JSA and doing a 20,000 word dissertation so I can see some of where you are coming from).

Do try to keep them sweet by abiding by their rules but do also pay them something. The gov't are taking £32 a week out of my JSA for my mortgage interest so maybe thats a starting point. I don't care if they won't accept it. You tell them you are leaving it at X or have filled the car up with that amount of petrol. Force them to take it as it will put you on a bit more of an adult - adult relationship.

Once you have finished your module get a job. Good luck with that cos it's tough out there.

B

Thanks for understanding. At least you've understood that it's a two-way thing. Some people think i'm a spoiled brat, but i've had the p*** ripped out of me for the last 10 years and have been treated as a sort of maid even whilst i've supported myself and lent them money in difficult situations. It really irritates me how people are coming in here, seeing that i'm not worshipping my parents and then proceeding to call me a spoiled brat who deserves to be kicked out.

27col

The more you trot out your pathetic excuses, the less sympathy you are going to receive. You don't like being told to do things. Well perhaps if you did some of them without being asked, you might avoid being "told". You come across as someone with a chip on both shoulders, and an exaggerated sense of "what's right". You can argue until you are blue in the face, but if you are not paying anything and also not doing anything to help, then in my book, you are sponging off your parents.

Vanille_2

Voyager2002 wrote: »

An additional point: several of your parents' "unreasonable" rules are things that would actually help your mental health. The points about eating and sleeping have a direct bearing upon this.

I find it incredible that you refused to share your meal with your brother when he was hungry.

Why don't you eat with the rest of your family?

This is what I can't understand. I'm being judged for this????

Ok imagine this: you've just come in from spending a few hours out. You cook a meal, that is just the right size. You brother comes into the house and then your parents demand that he has half of it. The means that i'd require a second meal. My brother could have cooked his own meal but he was too lazy, so I was expected to forfeit my meal that I had just bought and prepared myself.

I find it incredibly rude that I was expected to give half of my meal away because my brother was too lazy to cook. If he needed the meal ASAP and was stuck, i'd have given it to him, but that wasn't the case.

The whole world then seems to think i'm the most selfish person in the world.

poet123

I think that you genuinely believe the rules your parents have and the comments they make are unreasonable. As you present them on here most people disagree. Now, there may be more, but on the premise that posters generally present the worst issues in posts of this nature to garner support I suspect this is as bad as it gets. So, it seems to me that it is you or perhaps (only perhaps, as to universally attribute this type of behaviour to a condition is to do a disservice to the majority of sufferers) your illness. Most probably the lack of recognition is to do with the illness, as is your reaction to those who point this out.

I also think that given your other issues (court case etc) you do present with ASD symptoms. Unless you can accept that you have empathy issues and that if everyone else is always wrong to you, there is an issue, and not with them, you are going to have a really difficult life.

sukysue

Well see I have to stick up for the op as I am of the firm belief that children are born to their parents and until the day they (parents) die it is our responsibility to help and guide our children.

Vanille_2

assj wrote: »

I like your thread a lot!, you have some very valid points, you should be allowed to do as you please, but this is only when you are in control of your life.

Until you are in control of how you live, where you live and so on, you have to do things that you do not want to do and you do have to put up with things like this.

We all do this in some way for all of our life, even if it's just something small we all do it.

Your attitude seems strong and as such I guess your parents are the same or at least one is!. You will clash and that is normal.
Do you think your parents maybe concerned with what you are doing and this is how they show their emotion of this concern.

I am younger than you and have children and if you were my child I would be concerned because we all have something in mind for what we expect our children to be and do, it is very difficult to accept what they do and how they do it!.

Only when you are on the street do you know that they are no longer bothered!. I would keep quiet, act like a mouse and get what you need from this situation.

On another note, what does your sport and other peoples situations got to do with this, if you can become angry at opinions on this thread then you need to look at what this is all about. Remember one thing you are not the only person to do all of those things, if people respect you for it then great, if not then don't worry. Suicide is not the business of anyone here and nor should there opinions be taken into consideration by you. Who are these people? I don't know and neither do you!.

Respect yourself, not everyone respects others, that's life!

HTH

Thankyou for being amongst the minority that have at least pondered my side of the situation.

The reason I mentioned sport is because I was trying to reinforce my opinion of why I should deserve at least minimal respect. Alone it means nothing, but i'm just adding it to my profile because it's not like i've done nothing with my life. People are treating me as though I left school at 16 then stayed at home on the xbox, then I rebel against my parents. I've done more in my life than most, so what, i'm back home for 2 months, does that negate everything i've ever done? I'm back to being a child again then?

merlin68 wrote: »

Have you claimed DLA for your illness? or even ESA?. Your attitude is very much like my friend's son who has Asperger's syndrome.
His very self opiniated and annoying.

Actually I have been told by the Dr. that I think in certain patterns like people with Asperger's do, but I don't have it. Believe it or not I'm quite sociable and know many people, I don't have many friends because I don't truly get along with enough people to have them around me all the time. I have lived in various student residences and many people would vouch that I have no social issues.

You are sort of correct though on one thing. I've been told I think very logically, perhaps too logical. Most people rely on emotions and so i'm unusual to look at everything from a logical perspective, which is a negative thing. That's why in these arguments I really feel that logically i'm correct, but most people seem to disagree because i'm living under their roof, therefore all of my arguments are void.
I usually get on more with students, as most adults (certainly where I live) aren't so open-minded and tend to spout the typical Jeremy Kyle s***.

I don't know what DLA is, but I don't think of myself as having a disability or illness. Knowing that I have a personality disorder just enables me to categories my personality. Everybody has some slight attributes of some physical/mental ailments, but some more than others. I just happen to be one of those that's further up on the scale. It doesn't mean i'm wrong, it just means I deviate from normality.

CH27

sukysue wrote: »

Well see I have to stick up for the op as I am of the firm belief that children are born to their parents and until the day they (parents) die it is our responsibility to help and guide our children.

But his parents are helping & guiding him.
They are providing a roof over his head. They are feeding him. They also guiding about him about sensible bedtimes, helping out around the house etc etc.

[Deleted User]

Try contacting your local YMCA. I think they have flats and are especially out to help 16-28 yr olds. They may be able to give you some advice.