Kids coming over to play with mine and expecting food and drink!!

play2day

lol.. Lysiane.. I agree with you! I made my suggestion of offering beans on toast as a 'half way' measure for victory. Perhaps she cannot afford to feed her childrens friends? Beans on toast is not a bad meal nutritionally and is something I would give my family as a lunch. All children should be encouraged to drink water rather than juice, not just because of tooth decay but also due to sugar osmosis causing dehydration.
Personally anybody who is in our home at mealtime is welcome to join us at the table for what we are having, whatever it is and whatever thier age. However I realise that not everybody is in our fortunate position.

Lysiane

Rachie_B wrote:

not everyone can afford it !

I do understand that not everone can afford it , but if you give a pack of crisp or biscuit to your child , would you give something to your children and let friend watching her/him eat ???

When I read this from the op

I get this all the time, kids that come over to play and have their dinner then fine but others.... my one gets a biscuit, they want one, a packet of crisps, make that 2 and on and on!!

I am just thinking , yes of course it add up when you have to give each time extra , especially with 4 kid , but I still cannot and wouldn`t dream of giving something to my dd and let the other one watch!!!

lottee

As someone else has mentioned, I make up a plate of sliced carrots, apples, grapes, pears, cheese & crackers, or whatever else I have 'hanging' around. (not all of that at once mind you! lol) In the summer it's great, as the kids are happy with an 'icey pole' or two, they are cheap to buy or you can make your own up easily.
There was a little girl, who has sinced moved (thank god!!) that constantly said she was hungry/thirsty. But after they'd had their 'snack', if she asked again I would say that she should go & ask her mummy what time dinner is!!! So maybe you could try that??!! I think she just associated our house with food for some reason!
Kids will be kids as they say!

silvercar

I'm also amazed. If my children take any food they have to offer it to their guests!

Imagine in the adult world, a friend pops in and you make yourself a coffee and don't offer you friend! Unthinkable!

cupid_s

Surely it's not even the point whether you give cheap stuff or not. I don't have kids (i hope too soon) but if I did and they went to someone's house I wouldn't want them to be given biscuits/crisps etc I would want these to be strictly limited - by me. Even something healthy like beans on toast isn't good if they're going home soon after for their dinner. How can you keep track of what you're child is eating if other parents feed them without you knowing? I'd maybe give fruit but that's it (and fruit isn't exactly cheap). I bet the kid who goes and asks their friends parents for a pack of crisps and biscuits doesn't tell his mom when he gets home and asks her for a pack of crisps and biscuits as well.

abbecer

I am on a tight budget with food but will feed anyone who comes to the house. Anyone, family, friend, child or adult it doesn't matter. It is what everyone in my family has always done and i guess it's just passed on. My Auntie had 6 children but if we turned up at tea time we were fed the same and everyone had extra bread to make it go further. My sister who's 13 often comes and stays all weekend and usually fetches a friend for good measure, both get fed and watered. I enjoy people feeling welcome and accepted in my home. It's certainly not gourmet food but they are welcome to what i have. I would draw the line at rudeness and children asking for food rather than waiting to be offered. I'm always the mum who packs a picnic and takes all the kids to the park. Usually basic food like jam sandwiches and a banana or something but i enjoy doing it.

Rebecca x

black-saturn

If it was once in a while it would be OK but the OP said 'keeps saying shes hungry' which suggests it's happening on a regular basis. It's not up to you to feed someone elses children no matter how hungry they are. Don't their parents feed them? If you start it now it will be expected every time they come round and then you'll find the parents will be sending them round for something to eat in the guise of coming round to play. Believe me I've been there and got the T shirt. You have to put your foot down.

I bet the children's parents are out at work while your expected to babysit for free and feed their children.

Alikay

I agree with Lysiane. Its important to be hospitable and welcoming with your kids pals just as it is with your own friends. We've never been so skint that we can't stretch to a glass of squash and a rich-tea. Now they're all teenagers they get a cup of tea and toast or biscuits, and I always have eggs, pasta, beans etc in if a quick meal is needed.
I can appreciate that some people are on a very limited budget, but giving your own kids a snack and not the friends seems very strange. I think that's the point where being thrifty crosses the line into meanness.

Becles

My two don't snack between meals, so we never have a problem with anyone asking for food. I do offer squash or tap water to their friends if they get thirsty though, but most know we don't eat between meals and they don't ask.

I do keep bits handy and sometimes give them biscuits or small packets of sweets if they have been really good, or ice lollies in the summer when it's really hot. It's more of a treat than a regular occurance though.

I got sick of mine going into other peoples houses and coming home stuffed full of biscuits and crisps, then leaving a decent home made meal as they were too full of junk to eat it. I've told them they have to refuse food and say they haven't had their tea yet.

victory

Lysiane wrote:

I do understand that not everone can afford it

I am just thinking , yes of course it add up when you have to give each time extra , especially with 4 kid , but I still cannot and wouldn`t dream of giving something to my dd and let the other one watch!!!

Nor would I ever dream of letting a child watch while I gave mine a packet of crisps or anything else, no no no, I am not saying that, I cannot afford it like Rachel says first off and secondly it is not my responsibility to feed another child, I felt really bad and guilty to suggest she went home to be fed but that is what it is- it is not up to me to feed her.
Some of the suggestions are excellent, the cheap biscuits is excellent idea and the baked beans brilliant, kids come over all the time this is an open house, my kids happiness and playtime is important to me but I cannot feed them all!1
The kids that come over and are having dinner here and know that then yes great no probs and ice-cream for dessert or a youghurt no probs there but when htey come over to play and nothing has been said and they ask for it and expect it that is a different matter xxx