How much contact for adult children and their parents?

tinktinktinkerbell

how it used to be: i used to call my dad daily bar a friday and a saturday, i use to see him once a week on a saturday

how it is now since he started going out with a cow: im lucky if i call him once a week and see him once a month

see the OHs parents about once or twice a year

podperson

I live about 200 miles away from my parents so speak to them around once a week and try to see them every few months. When I lived close by I would see them once a week. I'm really close to them and do miss not being able to see them as much now
OHs parent's will call him every few months if he's lucky - usually only cause it's a special occasion, eg someone's birthday. Alternatively they will call us (or sometimes just email) on a Tuesday/Wednesday to say they are in our area that weekend visiting other family and do we want to go for a meal that Friday. If we have already made plans or can't rearrange then we don't see them as they won't rearrange anything else they have on over the weekend.

Luella-14_2

I (24) see my mum maybe 3 times a year. She moved 300 miles away when I was 15 and it's quite difficult to get to see her more often. We talk on the phone / email once a week generally. I don't feel that we're particularly close but nor that we've missed out on anything. I know it upsets my mum if my siblings or I don't contact her on a regular basis so I do make an effort, it generally just results in small talk though.

My Dad lives nearby and I see him once a week and we're in contact by phone / email maybe twice a week.

nearlyrich

My parents are both dead as are my OH's we are now the "elderly parents" I suppose. DD lives about 5 mins away and I speak to her see her quite a lot, she only moved out a couple of months ago. DS lives 250 miles away but due to my job taking me to his locality I still see quite a bit of him. We talk text email whatever and if I think I haven't seen or heard from one or the other for a while I usually send a quick text to say are you OK? Funny I have seen more of DS recently than DD due to holiday and her work patterns and mine.

angelil

I'm 25; moved out 3 years ago. I have some form of contact at least once a week with both parents, whether this is by phone or email. I live in another country now though so I'd say I see them 4 or 5 times a year at most (which actually is probably quite good CONSIDERING I live overseas ).

It's probably also quite good considering that my husband (who, too, moved out of his parents' home 3-4 years ago, when he was 27 or so) still lives in the same country as his parents (although we live in the north of France and they live in the south...about 5 hours' drive) and sees them probably less than I see mine! He speaks to his mum on the phone every Sunday without fail (she calls him) but I don't think they have any contact during the week.

I'm not sure that "normal" matters in this situation...what matters is what makes everyone happy

fishooX

I speak to my mother 4 to 5 times a week and like 3 times or so with my dad.

Youdontseeme

I live about 350 miles away from my parents.

When I first moved away I would never go home, even had a few Christmas on my own to avoid going back but I still spoke to my Mum about twice a week (she rang me).

In the past two years or so things have got a lot better we speak almost everyday sometimes more on the weekend, and I go home a lot more (6th visit this year next week) and also they come down to see me a lot more.

The only time I speak to my Dad is for him to say "How are you? i'll go get your mother" but I think thats cause he's a bit deaf and doesn't like talking on the phone. When we see each we can have a laugh even if he is a bit of a grumpy sod these days!

My sister who lives with my parents only rings when she has problems with her computer or to dicuss parents birthday / mothers / fathers / christmas presents etc. I occasionally get a bit of a chat if she answers the phone when I call. We do chat online alot. If we are in the same room you cant shut us up.

I miss not being nearer to them A LOT these days and am trying my best to find a job nearer to home.

YDSM

Ada_Doom

I used to talk to my mum several times a week and see her every other week. She died in April this year and it is the phonecalls I miss most of all. When something happens in my life I still think oh, must ring Mam, and then it hits me that i cant. Its very painful.