Real life MMD: Should I pay off her debts?

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Money Saving Polls
202 replies 53.3K views


  • edited 13 January 2012 at 3:13PM
    SpinoirSpinoir Forumite
    1 Post
    edited 13 January 2012 at 3:13PM
    I have a simular situation. Been with my gf for about 16months now, living together for 10months.

    When she did our new year budget she included 2 loans she has taken out on her car before we had even Met. This is a total of £255 per month.

    This has annoyed me as she didn't even ask me before hand. Bear in mind I do not drive. I have agreed to help pay half of her road tax, insurance, petrol etc but I'm unsure if it is the right thing to do to pay half of her loan each month, especially as we haven't been getting on that we'll recently. :(
  • serious_saverserious_saver Forumite
    848 Posts
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    There are a few reasons I would say don't do it.

    1) If the relationship doesn't work out, she may feel obliged to stay because she feels she owes it to you. Even if she doesn't feel that way it will probably be in the back of your mind that she does.

    2) If you just pay it off then you WILL start to resent it every time she buys something frivolous for herself. (you may think you won't resent it but you will)

    3) She will feel prouder and more confident in herself if she is able to deal with this herself (even if it is with your help and support).

    4) You have saved for a reason. How would you feel if you lost your job or needed to buy a house but didn't have the money because you had given it away?

    5) I'm sure there are many more reasons that I can't think of at the moment.
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