My boyfriend said "Yes.I'll marry you" on facebook...

make_me_wise

My advice is dont even think of getting married till you are in your 30s. Get out there and have the best time of your life, doing whatever it is that rocks your boat. Travel, go to Uni, get a great job. Spend the next few years doing all you can and meeting as many people as you can. Only then can you truly know what it is YOU want from life.

You have much better chance of settling down with someone for the long haul happily, if you do this.

To be honest if a boyfriend had said they wanted to marry me when I was your age I would have run for the hills. Dont tie yourself down OP.

dawn_rose

Hiya I met my now husband when id just turned 16. we got together and new it was a match. We disciussed future ect and we got engaged on my last alevel exam. I then went on to study for a degree for three years but stayed at home and commuted so we were able o see each other. I graduated then we bought a house and i got a full time job, he worked full time from 17. we got married when i was 22 and were 30 now and still very much together and have 3 loverly kids. theres never been anyone else for us and we love it that way. It can work if its right but id also say that if he loves you then he will wait until your ready for further commitment. If he wont he isnt worth it hun and he aint the one. x

RichGold

If he was closer, say 29.7 miles, I'd say go for it!


But 30.1 miles is too far.

make_me_wise

Charley.christian wrote: »

well, i said that he was too young too, but he said he was ready to think about the future. I'm not sure if i'm ready. i can't tell him that though.

Charley.christian wrote: »

And we've already had times where we nearly ended it but i totally forgive him because i know people make mistakes.

Two very good reasons not to rush into settling down with someone who accepted a marriage proposal you didn't even make. At your age relationships shouldn't be about forgiving people because they make mistakes or being unable to tell them what you think or feel.

When you meet 'the one' you should be able to express your views and opinions on everything and have them heard and respected. It doesn't mean you will always agree, compromises will have to be met. But you should never feel like you cant say what you feel.

McKneff

And having said all that, I met my OH when I was 14, we got together when I was 17, married at 18 and we're still together
43 years later. Would I do anything different, (no, Im not going to say 'too bloody right') I would do it all over again with a few tweeks but I would do it 10 years later.

Good luck and look forward to all the friends you are going to make at College etc.

make_me_wise

jamespir wrote: »

it would be silly to get married at 17 wait till youe been togetha a long time ive been with my gf for nearly 10 years and im not ready to rush in to marriage

According to my mates at the news of the world your girlfriend has arranged a surprise wedding for this saturday. Best get your suit sorted mate

no-oneknowsme

McKneff wrote: »

This will all be a distant memory by the time your 25.

Just as "the other side of the coin....."

When I was just a week short of my 14th birthday I started going out with a local lad , he was 17. We were inseperable , young love and all that and swore that we were going to be together forever .

We dated for a while and people - including my parents - told me that it was just puppy love and that in a few years I wouldnt even recognise this guy if I passed him in the street.

When I hit 16/17 we got engaged , both agreeing that it would be a long engagement.......

At 18 I was pregnant (planned) so the engagement was pushed aside. At 21 I had our second Daughter and at 24 I had our Darling first Son....

At the age of 26 we eventually got married , just a small do with only immediate family there.

I didnt go to university , I have NEVER been outside the UK on holiday and I have certainly never flirted with foreign waiters but you know what? None of that matters !

From the day I met my now Husband I knew that he was worth for-saking all of that , the life that I have means more to me that anything else.

I can honestly say that even after 23 years I love my Husband as much as I did way back then .

OP , if you love your boyfriend then only you know what you should do about his proposal.

My advice is to follow your heart and do what is right for you.

Figure out what is imortant to you and go for it! I know that there isnt one single aspect of my life that I would change.

Jesswithwings

Charley.christian wrote: »

Okay so my boyfriend is on holiday 30.1 miles away or a 45 min drive away, we don't have a car. and I'm not allowed to visit him.

so anyway, I was having a casual conversation with my boyfriend & he said "Yes.I'll marry you" I never even asked him and yes, it was on facebook.

I'm 17 and he's 16, although he acts like he's older & mature.
We've talked it out and if we do get married we're going to get married at 20-25 . and he asked me before. and he said he'll ask again properly when he has a ring.

What do you think?

When I was 17 I had a 16 year old boyfriend who told me he wanted to marry me. I was :eek: even though I really liked him, but I knew we were very very young and had a lot of things we both wanted to do before marriage was on the cards (like A levels, uni etc) he kept on about it and each time I laughed it off...and when I was 19 he asked me to marry him, on bended knee, with a ring he had saved up for and bought all by himself. I said yes, even though at the time I doubted that he would want to stay engaged when he went to university the next year (200 miles away) and met lots of pretty girls. I really did love him at this point but still I thought we were very young. University came and we qualified 3 years later. We got married at the age of 22 and 23, and 8 years later we are still very very happy and very much in love.

It CAN work, its rare but its possible. But guard your heart - there's a lot of growing up and changing to do - naturally. Take this comment with a big pinch of salt, don't mention it again. If he says it again then make a comment about how maybe one day in the future... yada yada yada... don't rush into an engagement, just enjoy the relationship you have and see where it goes in a couple of years.

AnnaLicious_2

I think it's so sweet, I could just give you a little cuddle. You love him, he loves you, you're on the brink of adulthood and he wants to be a proper adult and get married. There is no love like that young love, and just enjoy every minute.
It may not last, you may not get married, and in 2 years you may be completely different people. Or, you could have save up some money for a flat, be finishing your college courses, and looking for your first 'proper jobs'.
When I was you age we called it a 'promise ring'. As in - you're not engaged, but it's a promise to each other that one day you might be. Maybe look at it that way?
Either way, just enjoy it, don't put too much pressure on the future, and enjoy being young.
btw - don't be hard on yourself can call yourself socially ackward. Every 17 year old is. Just be yourself.

ceridwen

Wait till you are both a bit older and then decide.

You are both WAY too young to be thinking of marriage. I'm not saying its totally impossible/out of the question - because occasionally/just very occasionally people are mature enough to "know their own mind" at your sorta ages. BUT ...it doesnt happen very often and whats the rush? Just wait and see - give it some time...you may both feel the same way...you may not. Most people wouldnt. Only time will tell......and what IS the big rush?