Confused and upset.

jackieglasgow

My husband says "its a bit odd, and as a bloke I would guess he fancies her or is involved with her. You don't XXXX to pictures of faces unless its someone you are intimate with and/or haven't seen for a while. " While I think that's a bit simplistic (he is a man after all ) I do agree with him. Lots of tough talking needed Bigmomma. xxx

Bridesmaid83

Please find someone who loves and respects you. you deserve better than this.

erdd2

Replace the picture with one of a pervy type old man! I am not insinuating the act is pervy, but with your friends pic!!!

melancholly

i hope everything is ok.... it's worrying that he's gone out for so long without letting you know where he is. my OH would be in massive trouble for not appearing at food times or at least letting me know an ETA. disappearing for so long isn't fair. he may be just trying to put off a difficult situation/conversation, but a text to say something is the least he could do.

at this point, i'd put the chain on the inside of the door until i went to bed, just so i'd hear him try to come in. if my OH disappeared for this long i'd be ringing friends and family very worried. aside from the obviously awful behaviour last night, this is compounding the problem (and would be enough for me to be very angry just by itself).

roxydogbert

Hi OP - ((((hugs)))) I hope you are OK.

What an awful situation. He has behaved terribly and you do not deserve to be treated like this. You MUST have it out with him, the sooner the better, as you will stew over this and it will make you ill.

You have to start by asking him why he felt he had to w@@* over a photo of your friend. He cannot deny this, you caught him errr.. 'redhanded', but was too embarrassed/angry/upset/confused to say this to him at the time.

You also have to tell him that you overheard him actually making that 'lovely' comment about fancying your mate at your hen/stag do's.

If he tries to turn everything on its head and tell you that you're talking rubbish, you have to stand your ground. The comment at your hen do was heard with your own ears. The w@@* was seen with your own eyes.

Is he home yet? It is seriously out of order that he is not contactable on his mobe or that he hasn't even called you to say when he's coming back. He is (again) being disrespectful to you, by treating you like this. You are the mother of this child and his wife and not a 'house mate' in a shared house.

Stay strong. You MUST have 'words' with him when he's back home.

xxx

*Louise*

Good grief - I just read this out to my hubby and his jaw dropped! Neither of us can believe you have put up with such treatment from someone who is supposed to love and respect you.

IMO - your mistake was not continuing down the stairs and saying 'Having fun sweetheart?' It's easier for someone to brush it off and make you feel you are over-reacting after the event.

I hope he comes home soon, so you can have your say :mad:

make_me_wise

bigmomma051204 wrote: »

i have a friend who i used to work with and who i still speak to all the time. She is attractive and vivacious and most men would probably like her!

At the joint end of the hen/stag night, my H2b and mates were outside the pub in the beer garden and me and my mates were inside.

i decided to go out and say hello, they were all pretty drunk - he was with close friends and his dad. As i got outside, he obviously hadnt noticed me there and was telling everyone to look at my friend, about how he wishes he had met her earlier and how fit she was etc etc...

So, the other day i was clearing out things at work (my friend no longer works with me left in the spring of this year) and i found a photo of her in which she looks really pretty so i thought i would take it and give it to her next time i see her to kind of cheer her up after break up etc.

So, last night i was really tired and suggested an early-ish night to my hubby. He said he didnt wanna go to bed yet and would stay up. I fell asleep for about an hour or so (was about midnight) then when i realised he hadnt come up, thought i would pop down and get a drink, say hi etc as u do.. He obviously didnt hear me coming down, and when i got halfway down, i saw that he was holding my friends photo and erm, well pleasuring himself (am i allowed to say that on here eeek?) .... he didnt see me and i went back upstairs very upset and confused.

BTW, i KNOW that there isnt anything going on with him and my friend as he is not her type at all, and well i just know for sure as they dont know anything about each other, havent got each others numbers, or anything.

Hate to say this but as I got to each of the points I have quoted from your original post I knew what was coming next before reading it. Im not going to state on here how far off the mark I think your last paragraph is and what I think is going on. Im so sorry OP, I think you can read between the lines.

Bitsy_Beans

Bigmomma I hope your H has turned up by now and that you are having a serious sit down discussion. For what it's worth having a bit of self love over an "unknown" on a film or internet is one thing I could accept but over a friend of yours.....words fail me. Hope you can resolve your problems x

abacus73

Im so sorry to say this but I think he is with your 'friend' coming up with a way to cover up their affair. He isn't beyond lying to people, covering things up or doing things behind your back is he?

We all have fantasies, but to turn down going to bed with you and then w>>> to a picture of your mates face is a horrendous way to carry on.

Personally if I had heard my husband talking that way to his mates about anyone on our hen/stag nights the wedding would have been called off instantly. He wasn't so drunk that you couldn't clearly hear what he said.

SkintBrideToBe

Just reading to see if u had came back online yet huni. I hope everythings ok xx