Is my husband an alcoholic?

Eager_Elephant

(((HearlyHadEnough))) I'm sorry that you had a bad weekend - I guess it is getting to the stage of TotallyHadEnough!!

Hope you can get to Al Anon or be able to talk to someone.

Have you spoken to your husband about the drinking or does he not think there is a problem?

EE

ailuro2

You're still enabling him by being there. Leave and show you r kids what life is like without an alcoholic father... they are already deprived of money because he drinks so much, how much harder would it be to rely on some support from benefits - and it would probably help them when it's time to head to Uni.

Just do it - don't beat about the bush

I say this as someone who left behind an alcoholic many years ago and went on to meet Mr Right. That was about 20 years ago, Im so glad I left when I did. You'll understand once you're not under the cosh of drink all the time how seriously living with a drinker affects your daily quality of life.

How will you feel when your husband kills someone ( could be one of your kids or their friends) knowing you could have put a stop to it by calling Crimestoppers and reporting him anonymously? Sorry if that sounds cruel, but people are killed by drunk drivers every day, sadly the drunks don't seem to die as often probably because their bodies are relaxed and don't sustain such terrible internal injuries.:(

the_cat

How many more 'bad weekends' is it going to take for you to stop procrastinating and do something positive to change your situation? Make today the day you phone AlAnon

claire16c

the_cat wrote: »

How many more 'bad weekends' is it going to take for you to stop procrastinating and do something positive to change your situation? Make today the day you phone AlAnon

I agree. Youve said this several times now.

Are you going to wait til he's killed someone first?

mrs_marty

I've just read this whole thread, I'm sorry but you really have to phone the police, if he kills someone how on earth are you going to live with yourself knowing that you could have done something to prevent that?!?

emsywoo123

ailuro2 wrote: »

I say this as someone who left behind an alcoholic many years ago and went on to meet Mr Right. That was about 20 years ago, Im so glad I left when I did. You'll understand once you're not under the cosh of drink all the time how seriously living with a drinker affects your daily quality of life.

I so know what you mean.....er except the meeting Mr Right and the 20 years ago bit :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

I left my ex when I discovered I was pregnant, and it was truly the hardest decision I have ever made, but I now have a 9 month old DS and I can honestly look back and be amazed at the dark cloud that was over me that everyone else could see but me :eek:

louise3965

Gawd you do have to zip up your man suit and deal with this. He wont! It will be awful, you will weep buckets whatever you do but you cant carry on like this. He is dangerous.

ska_lover

I wouldn't waste time mulling this over..this man is a vile specimen and won't be any great loss to you.

he is so wrapped up in his need to get drunk that he puts his own children in danger. Unforgivable behaviour from him.

If he injures one of your kids by drink driving........how will you feel then?

You know what he is like, but you let him take the kids with him. If you do nothing else, please stop him taking the kids out with him.

Think...you could prevent a tragedy.

Be strong.

BWZN93

NearlyHadEnough wrote: »

For me, I think I've spent enough years being lonely and miserable while being married - there is no way that being on my own would be any lonelier.

If you feel alone already, then maybe it is time to call it a day. I know you are with him for the children but it sounds as though they are rapidly losing respect for him too. Sometimes you have to put yourself first, the by product being a happy home for the children rather than one where they feel like they are walking round on eggshells.

Big hugs - if your intuition is telling you to get out, then follow it. Its never wrong. xx

potnoodle_2

nearlyhadenough, i am in a very similar situation, wondered if i was being ott in thinking my husband was alcoholic as like your husband he drinks mainly in evening, not as soon as he wakes up which I thought was the sign of an alcoholic. My husband wets the bed, i can't buy new mattresses as he will wee on them, its disgusting. He is only happy when he is smashed out of his face and a moody miserable sod in the morning with the kids when he has a hangover. My sons are 13 and 14, my eldest doesn't get on with him at all and has no respect for him as he has seen him drunk so often.

I think we both need to man up and kick them out.