Can't do anthing right.....

RacyRed

80s_Child wrote: »

I've been swamped by feelings of inadequecy at the moment.

I've put on weight over the last year (size 10 to 14) and OH comments that I am bigger and I should go to the gym. I did join one but I was too embarassed at my size and lack of fitness to go. He also says that I should get my hair done more often and use sunbeds to make myself look better. I've said I will if he pays for it but funnily enough he hasn't yet.

We went to his friend's party at the weekend and I made a huge effort, got my hair done, bought a new outfit (not very MSE) and tried fake tan (not very successfully:o). I really wanted to look good and make him proud to be with me. He didn't make one single comment, so I felt like I may as well not have bothered.
I got a headache at the party (stressed out) and went back to our hotel to lie down. It went after a couple of hours, but I felt fat and orange (from the fake tan) so I sent him a text to say I still had the headache. He phoned saying he was disappointed I'd left early and that I should be there no matter what I looked like (that made me feel worse!)

We're looking at moving from the house we bought together in 2009. I loved the house but he was lukewarm and we can now get something bigger and better, although we'd both have to be in work to afford a bigger mortgage, which makes me nervous, given how things are.
I feel responsible for choosing the house we're in. We have seen a few houses but I feel my judgement is poor and am reluctant to say I 'like' any of them. (I actually don't like any more than the one we're in so far)

I feel like everything I do isn't good enough and it's really getting me down. Funnily enough I'm doing really well at work and have been promoted, so thats helped me build my confidence a little (I must be doing something right)
Not sure what would help - guess I needed to get things off my chest a little


I wrote a longer post orginally but I managed to delete it all! Says it all really.....

Op, have you considered stepping back from the situation you find yourself in? Is it possible for you to have a decent amount of time to yourself so that you can think through what is making you so upset without pressure?

Sometimes you need to get out of the wood to see the tree

RacyRed

Lotus-eater wrote: »

Ahh phooey, You can prove anything you like with statistics :whistle:

As you implied yourself earlier

I think what everyone was trying to get you to admit is that it is impossible to predict the future.

But if you think it is possible to be sure of what the future holds can I please consult you about my lottery numbers next week?

Lotus-eater

RacyRed wrote: »

I think what everyone was trying to get you to admit is that it is impossible to predict the future.

Ahh, someone who's sensible. Did you wander in here by accident?

Of course it is, I don't care! S'not my missus. :rotfl:

RacyRed

Lotus-eater wrote: »

Ahh phooey, You can prove anything you like with statistics :whistle:

Anyway, the statistic was for a thyroid to be taken out, then 2 years of meds not working, probably far lower than 15 in a 1000. Which is already a tiny percentage.
Which means it's highly unlikely, which is what I said

Errr, no. Statistically that one is quite high as well (I personally know three women who have had their thyroid gland surgically removed) It usually takes 2 years to stabalise medicated thyroxin levels (blood tests every 3 months for at least the first year), it is just the nature of the beast.

And if you want to argue the statistics of that one, go find the statistical proof for your own arguement (ya lazy b***** ). I've stated mine and I'm done

Lotus-eater

RacyRed wrote: »

Errr, no. Statistically that one is quite high as well (I personally know three women who have had their thyroid gland surgically removed) It usually takes 2 years to stabalise medicated thyroxin levels (blood tests every 3 months for at least the first year), it is just the nature of the beast.

And if you want to argue the statistics of that one, go find the statistical proof for your own arguement (ya lazy b***** ). I've stated mine and I'm done

I think you are mixing statistics with anecdotal evidence. Which I'm sure you will admit, is a very lax thing to do.

RacyRed

Lotus-eater wrote: »

I think you are mixing statistics with anecdotal evidence. Which I'm sure you will admit, is a very lax thing to do.

As I said, you go find the statistics to prove your viewpont this time, otherwise what you say is quite simply your point of view.

Lotus-eater

RacyRed wrote: »

As I said, you go find the statistics to prove your viewpont this time, otherwise what you say is quite simply your point of view.

I thought I already had

Anyway, the statistic was for a thyroid to be taken out, then 2 years of meds not working, probably far lower than 15 in a 1000. Which is already a tiny percentage.
Which means it's highly unlikely, which is what I said

What else do you want me to prove?

RacyRed

Lotus-eater wrote: »

I thought I already had

Anyway, the statistic was for a thyroid to be taken out, then 2 years of meds not working, probably far lower than 15 in a 1000. Which is already a tiny percentage.
Which means it's highly unlikely, which is what I said

What else do you want me to prove?

Source? ...............

Lotus-eater

You gave the statistic that the NHS said 15 women in a 1000 would be effected. It doesn't take a genius to work out that the amount of those 15 who get their thyroid removed and have problems with meds, must be less than the 15 in a thousand......... So.............

Person_one

Lotus-eater wrote: »

You gave the statistic that the NHS said 15 women in a 1000 would be effected. It doesn't take a genius to work out that the amount of those 15 who get their thyroid removed and have problems with meds, must be less than the 15 in a thousand......... So.............

You didn't do statistics at school did you?