Daughter is pregnant - at 15!

POPPYOSCAR

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

That's not a very nice thing to say about a 15 year old girl!

I did not read it the way you obviously have.

Nimeth

polejunkie wrote: »

Why are so many posters hell bent on trying to unmask the father as some sort of married 40year old sexual predator.

Because they are bored/have overactive imaginations/enjoy upsetting others/get their jollies out of being a complete t**t (delete as appropriate).

Fortunately it seems like the OP has ignored these trolling posts and has handled this situation fantastically.

POPPYOSCAR

looby75 wrote: »

because sadly we live in an time where all men are seen as perverts and there is a peado round every corner according to the media

There is a chance the father is someone in a position of power, but in all probability it's someone much closer to her own age.

Yes.

And I think the storyline on Eastenders with Witney probably sticks in peoples minds as well.

DON79

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

That's not a very nice thing to say about a 15 year old girl!

I think (hope) he meant more that there was no point saying it could be best friends brothers or school friend or x or y or z as there is no way you will know until the girl herself feels comfortable enough to tell her mum who the father is.

mrs_marty

Your doing so well. At least you now know how far along she is. I hope she opens up soon about the dad as then you will hopefully gain some peace of mind.

I hope her dad takes a similar approach x

POPPYOSCAR

Obviously, it can be seen from Poppyfields approach that she is a rational and sensible person who can see the 'unhelpful' posters for what they are and concentrate her attentions on the supportive posters who are trying to help.

Paradigm

polejunkie wrote: »

Why are so many posters hell bent on trying to unmask the father as some sort of married 40year old sexual predator.

Perhaps a bit of juicy scandal???

At the moment, the identity of the dad is secondary, Plenty of time to sort that. I don't see the need at this time to pile more pressure on the girl, everything will come out.... eventually!

There is no need to rush this ID, AFAIK there is no statutory bar or time limit for any prosecution, if it's indeed needed!

As a dad of 2 girls my only thoughts/actions at this time would be for them... everything else takes a back seat!

emmaanddave

OP, you seem to be a caring and strong mum for your daughter right now. I have 2 6yr old and hope that if needed I can be strong for them and support them even if my insides may be telling me they are making the wrong decision. If your daughter is finding it hard to talk to you about the dad etc maybe she could write you a letter or email and give it to you for you to read alone or with her? Some people find it easier to out into words how they feel/circumstances rather than trying to vocalise it?

On a lighter note would she enjoy going out for a coffee/cake with you? Just a thought of mum/daughter bonding!xx

poppyfield19

Hi everybody, I am trying the best I can so to hear people say they think I am handling it well.... really helps. It really does, as I worry that I'm not.

Her dad phoned me back and didn't seem angry as such - long pause on the phone when I told him. First thing he asked was is she okay, then who's the father? Why didn't you tell me she had a boyfriend? Is he going to support her? I'll come over tonight if that's best?

He's just going to come down at the weekend as usual, I think he's really just shocked at the moment. He phoned me back twice after to ask was I being serious, is she okay? etc.

Anyway, I'm really worried about her. When I asked her about the father (I hope nobody thinks I have rushed into it, I didn't plan on getting her to contact him instantly or anything I just wanted to know my daughter was okay and nothing dodgy had happened to her). She started to cry and said she couldn't talk about it and asked if she could go to her room. I've checked her since and given her a hug, told her she doesn't have to talk about it yet.

poppyfield19

She asked me if she could stay off school tomorrow and I think we'll go out and get a cake or something, go for a walk with the dogs together etc. Just spend some time with her. Really upset tonight - because she seems to be.