Daughter is pregnant - at 15!

poppyfield19

Errata I plan on asking her tonight when the younger 2 are in bed definitely. I'm a bit scared to ask!

poet123

As I understand it, they are only done after 20 weeks in exceptional circumstances (disability etc).

Torry_Quine

poppyfield19 wrote: »

Errata I plan on asking her tonight when the younger 2 are in bed definitely. I'm a bit scared to ask!

It will be a hard question but she may well want to tell and will be relieved to tell you.

Hope it goes well

poppyfield19

Thank you x

looby75

poppyfield19 wrote: »

They grow up so fast don't they looby?

The only place she ever goes with her friends (that I'm aware of) is walking their dog. Very confused and worried.

they do, scarily fast!

Well the thing is you know she is safe now medically and I think it's time you sit her down and tell her how worried you are about the father situation. She probably doesn't realise just how worried you are and will probably just be feeling relieved that she has finally been able to tell you about being pregnant and getting the correct info about her options.

Be honest with her and give her the chance to be as mature about the dad as she has been by telling you about the pg.

(hope that makes sense)

Torry_Quine

looby75 wrote: »

they do, scarily fast!

Well the thing is you know she is safe now medically and I think it's time you sit her down and tell her how worried you are about the father situation. She probably doesn't realise just how worried you are and will probably just be feeling relieved that she has finally been able to tell you about being pregnant and getting the correct info about her options.

Be honest with her and give her the chance to be as mature about the dad as she has been by telling you about the pg.

(hope that makes sense)

A good idea to stress how mature she is being in all this. Just hold her and let her know that you love her no matter what the answer

Caroline73_2

I think the daughter sounds mature enough to be asked if she was consenting or not. It only takes a minute to get pregnant so I'm assuming she's sensible 99% of the time.

OP maybe you could tell your daughter you aren't interested in the details of the father for now, but you just need to know that she was willing and not violated she would be prepared to discuss it a bit.

poppyfield19

Thank you - I'm trying to work out in my head how to 'word' what I say to her to be honest.

Have to go make dinner now, got 2 monkeys moaning about how starving they are!

moomoomama27

I had my first baby at the age of 17 (only just). I was 15 weeks when I told my Mum, I knew for a few weeks before that.

It will be a very confusing and emotional time for you all, but whatever she decides it sounds as though she has a great Mum in you. Like your daughter I told my Mum soon after finding out, I was scared, but once it was out in the open things settled.

In my own experience, much like your daughter I went between considering abortion, to definatley having the baby. It took several weeks to feel comfortable with my choice, and 14 years on I haven't regretted my decision, even if my 'baby' is a fiesty little mare at times!!

It was tough having a baby at 17, it was also harder as I was a single parent for a few years, before meeting my wonderful husband. but I continued with my education, and with the support of my family juggled a part-time job to avoid the benefits trap, and I have made a good job of my life, and although there have been times when I have felt isolated from my friends, on the whole it's been good!

Having a baby as a teen doesn't have to end your life, many people always seek out the doom and gloom, as long as your daughter has a good support system, she can achieve everything she wants to should she decide to continue with the pregnancy.

Good luck to you both x

poppyfield19

Thanks for your post moomoomama, that's exactly how she is, she keeps saying one thing, and then the other.