Help son looking at websites he shouldnt be

andy.m_2 · 6 May 2011 at 3:32PM

good grief

Tropez · 6 May 2011 at 3:36PM

Mojisola wrote: »

I don't think immortalprincess thinks an interest in sex is abnormal but a 13 year old watching hard core !!!!!! is a different issue. So is continuing to do it after promising not to.

The possibility of him going onto illegal sites is also an issue. The really heavy stuff has to be paid for but, if a child used Mum or Dad's card to access one of these sites, it could end up with very serious consequences. Just accessing some of the heavier !!!!!! sites could cause problems if Mum or Dad are in some jobs and the stuff is found when a computer is repaired.

Kids need to know what problems can result from what might seem to them just some exciting surfing.

I think this is pretty much it.

I've, obviously, nothing against !!!!!!, neither has my partner. She watches it sometimes for... ideas... :rotfl:

But the fact remains that virtually all of the popular video sites contain material that ranges from the relatively normal to the vile and extreme. I don't support any of these censorship acts that try and dictate what adults can and can't view (providing of course the actions depicted in the material are not criminal themselves) but I do support preventing young teenagers from viewing this material.

Now, I'll be honest. I'd seen sex in movies when I was 13. I covertly recorded Basic Instinct one night for example. At 15 I had the internet in my room, on slow 56k connections where streaming video was impossible, downloading a 5 minute clip took 30 minutes and pictures were about as much as you would get - and yes, amongst all the positive things I was doing on my computer, I was viewing some risque material as well. I won't hide that fact and I think all boys will, at some point or another, seek out !!!!!! - hard or soft - to satisfy their curiosities.

I had even seen some of the more extreme films by the time I was 14/15. The video nasties were still a bit of a phenomenon and it was no trouble getting hold of uncut copies of Cannibal Holocaust or I Spit on Your Grave - hell, it was the fact that they were banned that made me want to see them in the first place. These videos were being passed around our Church school for years. :rotfl:

But over a decade on I prefer to take a more objective view of it all and I can fully understand why parents would want to limit their children's ability to get hold of !!!!!!, and other material on the Internet. Many of the popular message boards, such as ebaumsworld, which have a predominantly adolescent following also have numerous links to material ranging from bizarre and obscure sex acts, to what are reportedly heinously violent videos of murders carried out by a bunch of Ukranian sociopaths (never seen them, don't want to), and I can therefore understand that parents can be concerned that a child could go from viewing a Tera Patrick video one minute, to accidently clicking a few "related links" and finding themselves watching the type of acts Cartman's mom gets up to.

I don't think overly prudish attitudes towards sex are healthy but I don't believe that overly open attitudes are healthy too. There should be a balance and at 13 there isn't going to be a consequence for preventing a child from watching !!!!!! by moving the computer to a more public area to act as a deterrant. As the child grows and matures the boundaries can be easily re-examined to allow more freedom.

Mojisola · 6 May 2011 at 3:40PM

Tropez wrote: »

Now, I'll be honest. I'd seen sex in movies when I was 13.

I had even seen some of the more extreme films by the time I was 14/15. The video nasties were still a bit of a phenomenon and it was no trouble getting hold of uncut copies of Cannibal Holocaust or I Spit on Your Grave - hell, it was the fact that they were banned that made me want to see them in the first place. These videos were being passed around our Church school for years. :rotfl:

What a contrast to a well-thumbed copy of Lady Chatterley's Lover doing the rounds at school!

FatVonD · 6 May 2011 at 3:43PM

Mojisola wrote: »

What a contrast to a well-thumbed copy of Lady Chatterley's Lover doing the rounds at school!

One of the girls at my school (we were 11) brought one of her dad's girly mags to school and sold the pages individually!

FatVonD · 6 May 2011 at 3:57PM

andy.m wrote: »

perhaps the OP should provide !!!!!! to the lad at a level they are happy with.
Mayfair used to be titty !!!!!!, definitely no furburgers so was weak and the mayfair kids got bullied.
Penthouse was the weopon of choice at my school yard, for the articles of course!

Funnily enough I used to know someone that wrote for Kna ve and Fie sta, she was pushing 50 then so must be nearing retirement age now and if I'd bet my last fiver she's still writing for them. I also know someone who was their designer who has some fantastic stories about taking turns riding around the office in a giant p*nis (don't ask me why.) I can't help but think they'd lose their appeal if the readers met the staff

Teddy_KGB · 6 May 2011 at 4:16PM

FatVonD wrote: »

One of the girls at my school (we were 11) brought one of her dad's girly mags to school and sold the pages individually!

That story just reminded me of the time when I was 14/15 and a lad at school got caught with his Uncle's laminated individual !!!!!! mag pages! :rotfl:

Plans_all_plans · 6 May 2011 at 4:43PM

jetta_wales wrote: »

Perhaps your views of sex are a little more sheltered than some.

Maybe some posting on here have 'sheltered' views of sex, as you describe them...my argument is that a 13 year old CHILD's views on sex should be nothing BUT sheltered.

emerald21 · 6 May 2011 at 4:45PM

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

Hi, my son was doing this at 13 also, I was really worried too, but at nearly 18 he isn't sexually deviant and has a normal relationship with a girl....

Hi Does he still know everything lol

Kimberley82 · 6 May 2011 at 4:53PM

I am not at all a sexually sheltered person but my concern here is the internet. When I was young, Im 29 now the !!!!!! we all looked at at that age was magazines. I have no problem with teens looking at 'normal' !!!!!! but some things online as really not suitable. Could his dad maybe make a deal with him that he only goes on certain sites?

rev229 · 6 May 2011 at 5:02PM

I have a 14 DS and had the same problem after he had a new laptop for xmas. We had installed security but not well enough. We paid someone to come in and sort out security and settings meaning his internet access is off at 10pm. The chap who did it has done some IT work for us before. I was mortified at having to ask hime but he has sons and knew the problems. It wasn't soft !!!!!! it was very hard core and abusive all aspects. We check the laptop regularly along with chat websites to police what he is up to. On monday he had managed to log into a !!!!!! forum which wasn't blocked, not sure how but it was a turkish website but all in english and very very nasty. He doesn't know we know what he has been up to. He is a very difficult child, aggressive and can be violent, he is on the Autistic spectrum. He would beleive what he sees is normal. The worry what he may do is awful.