Help son looking at websites he shouldnt be

Gloomendoom

jim22 wrote: »

A bit of !!!!!!-put hairs on his chest!

More likely his palms...

bluebag

immortalprincess wrote: »

Thank you everyone for your replies.

Will have a look at those security websites and see if I can download the security.

I have spoken to him tonight and said he will only be allowed on the computer in the kitchen, he hasnt to take it into his room.

I have asked him why he looks at these sites, and he said all the boys at school have been talking about them, and he felt left out!!!!

His dad is going to have another word with him tomorrow. I have had to tell my husband to calm down but hes more annoyed that he has ignored our rules, and he feels he has no respect for us rather than him looking at the !!!!!!!

Another thing thats really bugging me is the trust issue. he got caughte before and said he wouldnt do it again, and I trusted him not to look at them, and he has broken that trust. I find it really hard to trust people, so Im a bit upset about that, I feel kind of let down! Does that make any sense?

Oh and mods, if you do feel the need to move this to the arms, I would (as someone kindly pointed out) rather it was deleted than moved there.

You trusted him and he broke his promise, that should carry a consequence, otherwise he will learn he doesn't need to keep his promises to you.

I would think about a suitable punishment for not keeping his word to you.

chewmylegoff

when i was about 17, we got burgled, and the burglars pulled every draw out and emptied it on the floor turning the whole house into a total tip. i was away at the time, when i returned i found that my parents had cleared everything up except for the contents of my bottom draw. my mum had great fun teasing me about it until i eventually got fed up with her going on about it and pointed out that i'd nicked it all from my dad's stash in the loft.

but, er, yeah, i agree with the rest. whilst there is no way you will stop him looking, what you really want to make sure he doesn't start doing is spending hours locked away looking at it - that's what can be damaging. if he happens to see some at a mates house, well that's just life, but it isn't quite the same as *ahem* "individual research".

Peter999_2

Have you got windows 7 or Vista on your PC?

If so, you can use Windows Live Family Safety 2011, its available here :

http://explore.live.com/windows-live-family-safety?os=other

Its pretty easy to install. I've put it on my cousins PC's when her son started looking at dodgy websites and its worked a treat.

clairibel

Trouble is with the internet these days is that its not the same !!!!!! like years ago, there are a lot of hardcore stuff easily accessible, stuff i didn't even know about at 13. Thats what worries me about my 8 year old getting bigger.

My hubbie used to have a divan bed full of !!!!!! mags when he lived at home...i saw them. That i feel is just part of growing up and normalish.

But the internet is a different thing altogether and does need to be monitored.

john9to5

I think by 'banning' him from having access to the internet would only fule his problem, Surely he will just use friends computers or try and access it in other ways. I understand where you are coming from in consideration of his age etc but he is just exploring like most boys do at his age. Other boys at school will be looking at it too and there probably all comparing how 'cool' they are by looking at this. The best thing you could do would be to discuss it with him, dont be angry just have a conversation and understand why he is looking at it ?. Then once you have talked about it you need to make him understand that its wrong for someone of his age to be looking at it, you need to make him understand what !!!!!! is there for and what sort of people look at it etc and hopefully this will help, but being angry and snatching away his pc will just make him feel even more guilty for looking at it and make him feel wrong etc which would probabll mess his mind up more than if you just make him understand (IMO) X

gonzo127

had the same with my step son when he was 13, the interest is totally natural, so i wouldnt be too angry about that if i was you, otherwise you could have the oposite effect than you are hoping, and instead of gaining respect for women, he could end up thinking that sex is something to be ashamed of and so if he ever got himself in any sort of trouble, unplanned pregnancy or STI, he wouldnt be able to tell anyone about it.

i do however believe you need to put a punishment/consiquence in place for the fact he has broken your trust, although in all reality he was always going to try and look at more, and more than likely will try and look again, when my SS broke our trust with this we went with a web filter (went for net nanny at the time due to more control than k9) for 1 year with the understanding that we would get rid of it once we felt we could trust him enough not to (get caught) break our trust again.

silly question although not !!!!!! have you actually watched 'the sex education show' which was on channel 4 not long back, if not it would be well worth keeping an eye on it, ok your son might not feel comfortable sitting down and watching it with you but if you have the ability to record it, it might be something worth while getting so he can watch it in his own time as i thought it was very good and might allow him to get a bit of perspective on things

2010

It`s very, very difficult to know what to do in this situation and you`re not alone, it`s a nation if not worldwide problem for parents.

Everywhere you go it`s staring you in the face, even on a 9pm TV program the other week although that`s supposed to be educational.

Realistically I doubt if there`s anyone in the whole country that hasn`t viewed !!!!!! either by choice or accidentally.

Losing your rag with the boy will hardly help and will almost certainly make matters worse.
What you say to him will not have the same effect as what his mates tell him.
The WWW is here and it`s not going away and that`s a fact.
Parental controls on your PC could help, but of course, you can`t stop him looking at his mates PC`s.

Teddy_KGB

Mupette wrote: »

I walked in DS room 2 nights ago and he had a page up, from where i stood at the door it looked like lots of pictures of women some naked, he is 16.

i gave him the look of you've been caught again, but did say to him last night that although i know he looks at it, (much cheaper than a !!!!!! mag) be aware that this is not what normal girls look like.

It's a boy thing, your son is hormonal, be in the internet !!!!!! mags etc, he will find a away to look.

I wouldn't ban him, it won't turn him into a pervert, just make sure he knows that airbrushing is involved in these pictures and normal nice girls don't look like that in the real world.

:rotfl: Do you seriously think that any boy who watches !!!!!! will think that every girl looks like the !!!!!! girls? He just needs to look round at the girls at school to see that isn't the case.

What I would worry about is him thinking that all girls love the money shot and don't mind where the man puts it! He might start to think his package is too small cause he isn't 10"!

Mankysteve

Bettybigboobs wrote: »

Its !!!!!!.
its probably the latest "craze" at school.

At his age I suspect this is the biggest reason kids look at !!!!!!