Teenage (unplanned) pregnancy

taxi36

RAS wrote: »

so you have the termination and as a prize we will send you away for a weekend of booze and sex, where you might just get pregnant again!

And does NI have the same age limit as the UK for alcohol?

What is this women thinking of?

I dont actually think she WAS thinking!

I have the feeling that the "holiday" either would NOT have materialised OR that it would have occurred as a "present" for my Daughters 18th birthday - so later on in the year.

make_me_wise

jaibaby wrote: »

I don't see why you are worried. Is she incapable of bringing up a child?

My sister is 17 next month, she is in labour as we speak now. She is going to have a HUGE wakeup call when my niece is born. She thinks it's going to be all giggles etc. She thinks that because my three were brilliant babies, and slept all night, hers will be too. She will soon realise how hard it is to bring a child up in this world.

I am against abortion, unless in extreme cases. If you're old enough to open your legs and not be careful, then you're old enough to look after a child. (My opinion!!)

:eek:

Oh to be as wise as you and to be able to put my opinion across in such an eloquant, intelligient way

Good grief just when you think you have heard and seen it all, someone stoops even lower than you thought humanly possible.

What a vile post you wrote jaibaby. You sound really bitter and twisted.

make_me_wise

taxi36 wrote: »

Does any-one think I should start telling my Daughter that I WANT her to have the baby? Seems the other family are making their feelings on the situation obvious. Are me and my wife doing ourselves "harm" by not voicing our opinion? Should we be taking a different approach do you think?

Hi taxi36, personally I dont think you should be saying to your daughter that you want her to keep the baby. Instead I would make it crystal clear that you will love her and respect her whatever she decides to do. You could say that either way she will have yours and your wifes help and support and you will both back her decision 100%.

The other family are obviously pushing her to abort. There is the added pressure I am sure of her not just choosing to keep the baby or not, but I feel more likely, choosing between the baby and her boyfriend. I know which I would choose but that is irrelevant. If you suggest she should keep the baby then she is being pulled in too many directions and something will give. It could rush her decision.

I was completely agog when I read that the bf family said there would be no point in them going away for a weekend if she kept the baby. Do they really think that if she had an abortion she would immediately get over it emotionally and/or physically and want to drink and have fun at a hotel. That completely diminishes what she faces going through and the effects it will have on her if she does abort

Keep going OP. I see you are still getting some very cruel and bizarre responses from a minority of posters. Rise above it as mostly people have come on here to offer good advice and support your family

jellyhead

jaibaby wrote: »

I fell pregnant at 16, found out 6 months gone whilst I was doing my GCSEs.

I am now 27, have three children, the same partner (ok, fiance, we have been engaged for a good 10 years).

I don't see why you are worried. Is she incapable of bringing up a child?

My sister is 17 next month, she is in labour as we speak now. She is going to have a HUGE wakeup call when my niece is born. She thinks it's going to be all giggles etc. She thinks that because my three were brilliant babies, and slept all night, hers will be too. She will soon realise how hard it is to bring a child up in this world.


I apologise if this has already been said, but I only read the first few posts.

I am against abortion, unless in extreme cases. If you're old enough to open your legs and not be careful, then you're old enough to look after a child. (My opinion!!)

I hope your sister has an easy birth and a brilliant baby.

Errata

Does any-one think I should start telling my Daughter that I WANT her to have the baby? Seems the other family are making their feelings on the situation obvious. Are me and my wife doing ourselves "harm" by not voicing our opinion? Should we be taking a different approach do you think?

IMO you shouldn't be offering an opinion either way. You can't walk in her shoes, or live her life now and in the future. If you feel harmed by not voicing your opinion that's your business and you have to live with it.
Don't turn all this into two dogs fighting over a bone, your daughter deserves better. She's nearly 18 - a woman, and has to make decisions about her life as a woman without anyone telling her ' this will be best' 'no, this will be best'.

Hard_up,_not_happy

jaibaby wrote: »

I fell pregnant at 16, found out 6 months gone whilst I was doing my GCSEs.

I am now 27, have three children, the same partner (ok, fiance, we have been engaged for a good 10 years).

I don't see why you are worried. Is she incapable of bringing up a child?

My sister is 17 next month, she is in labour as we speak now. She is going to have a HUGE wakeup call when my niece is born. She thinks it's going to be all giggles etc. She thinks that because my three were brilliant babies, and slept all night, hers will be too. She will soon realise how hard it is to bring a child up in this world.


I apologise if this has already been said, but I only read the first few posts.

I am against abortion, unless in extreme cases. If you're old enough to open your legs and not be careful, then you're old enough to look after a child. (My opinion!!)

How anyone can get to your age and still be so ignorant is beyond me. Babies shouldn't be bought into the world in order to punish someone or to give them a wake up call. Is that really how you see things for your sister?

Seriously you come across really smug and almost relishing the chance to stand back and see your sister suffer. What kind of sick individual does that make you?

I pity your kids if this post is really an indication of your outlook on life.

What a completely horrible individual you are.

jellyhead

'old enough to open your legs' is a horrible phrase to use to the father of a teenage girl

mikeandrach_2

to the op, i am really sorry i cant offer much advice, i dont know how i would react in your situation but from what i can see, i hope i react in the manner you do. initial anger is natural, but you seem to have dealt with it very well.

but, one thing that really frustrates me, (and this is in NO WAY driected at the op), is the attitude some people have towards getting pregnant. some people have commented that they 'fell' pregnant. how the hell do you fall pregnant? you get pregnaant, dont try and shirk reposnibility or make it sound like some natural phenomonen. one person even said on page 1 that a friend or relative (?) had an abortiona t 15/16, then regretted it so much they had a baby at 19. now correct me if i'm wrong, but is that the best reaosn for having a baby?
i say this as someone whose wife has lost a baby this year but is now pregnant again, and i feel strongly about attitudes towards children, but please, people, just think before putting comments like 'i fell pregnant', coz if one thing wasn't involved in the process, my guess is it would be falling!

Errata

I think falling pregnant is a commonly used phrase. It doesn't mean the pregnancy was an accident or otherwise, nor unwanted or otherwise. Those who become pregnant should be given the courtesy of describing it in any way they choose, it's their pregnancy.

mikeandrach_2

i hear your point, and i dont disagree completely with it. just as an unscientific straw poll, of 10 friends/work colleagues who i can recall using the phrase, all 10 had totally unplanned pregnancies. just seems like a nice easy soft phrase to use as a way of shirking responsibility for their actions to me