How much drink???

lauren_1

Are you sure he doesn't have a second family? leading a double life?

For someone to work ALL hours of the day yet contribute nothing something doesn't add up.

Or should i take this at face value and assume you have MUG tattoo'd on your forehead?

fudgecat

My husband used to be a mini cab driver, though bless him he does not drink at all. He worked 6 nights a week, often 7, and used the hours as ana excuse to absent himself from family life. Despite the hours, once he had paid the diesel, the insurance on the vehicle (over £1300.00 per year at the time), kicked back 20% commmision and paid repairs and depreciation on the vehicle, he was worse off than his current job as a school caretaker (not known for princely salaries!).
If your other half spends so long in the pub and so much money on alcohol, I doubt that he is making any money at all - probably faling deeper in debt. He is obviously doing a job that lets him abrogate all responsibility to wife and family. I stood it for 12 years - not love, but sheer wheel turning grinding exhaustion and lack of vision of an alternative. Ultimately I gave mine an ultimatum of 6 months to find another job - and I meant it. Suggest you do the same - after all, what will you be missing?

djdido2

lauren_1 wrote: »

Are you sure he doesn't have a second family? leading a double life?

For someone to work ALL hours of the day yet contribute nothing something doesn't add up.

Or should i take this at face value and assume you have MUG tattoo'd on your forehead?

God know, I dont know anyone on this earth that would put up with him other than me.

He does not contribute anything because in his words he has spent a fortune in the last few weeks. (He brought me a flat screen TV for about £200 for Mother's day, my tv was old fashioned but it was sufficient and I am not one for fancy gadgets I will make do with what I have)

Yes I am a mug and I have realised this but now I have a massive backlash of his tactics (he has contacted my sister and asked her to have a word with me as I am going mental)

I asked him to leave last night and he got up and went, only to return hours later and go upstairs and get into bed. He is intimidating and thinks HE IS RIGHT. I have had to text to tell him to him I want him to leave and so far he hasn't been back.

BUT HE WILL SHOW UP LATER:(

ecgirl07

RedBern wrote: »

if your husband is drinking 3-4 pints a night then that should take about 9 hours to clear his system. His longer drinking session on Sunday of 10 pints will take about 23 hours to get out of his system - so if he drove yesterday he was probably over the limit.

This drinks calculator is interesting:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/12254668

3 - 4 pints costs about £12.50 so 10 pints is about £30 ...

just to enforce this point at £3 a pint - he is probably spending £10 a day monday to friday in the pub and £30 at the weekend - that is £80 per week in the pub plus whatever on cans in the house, add in taxis he is peeing away over £100 per week out of your household.

this is not the actions of a family man whose work is slow.

djdido2

ecgirl07 wrote: »

just to enforce this point at £3 a pint - he is probably spending £10 a day monday to friday in the pub and £30 at the weekend - that is £80 per week in the pub plus whatever on cans in the house, add in taxis he is peeing away over £100 per week out of your household.

this is not the actions of a family man whose work is slow.

Plus three cans a night every night of the week at around a £5 for four cans???

BUT THE THING IS HE SEE'S IT AS HIS MONEY!!!:eek:

The only mental I have in me is taking him back.

JBD

lauren_1 wrote: »

Are you sure he doesn't have a second family? leading a double life?

For someone to work ALL hours of the day yet contribute nothing something doesn't add up.

Or should i take this at face value and assume you have MUG tattoo'd on your forehead?

This was my immediate thought on reading the OP. [sorry, don't mean the mug part]. It rang a massive bell to me.
Either way, you and your children deserve much much more than this man is giving you.

djdido2

He does not have a second family I am 100% sure of that but I think it is more something to do with gambling or debt. Wish I had the time to find out as I would love to see the look on his face when he knew I wasn't daft or mental after all.

jinky67

Ah the old " she is mental" trick

Funny how drinkers always seem to use that as an excuse for their behaviour

beasygirl

djdido2 wrote: »

He does not have a second family I am 100% sure of that but I think it is more something to do with gambling or debt. Wish I had the time to find out as I would love to see the look on his face when he knew I wasn't daft or mental after all.

OP I really feel for you, I know what its like to feel like you're doing everying on your own with no support Just so happens my DH is a taxi driver too!

Just a thought, but do you think he could be gambling on the fruit machines, spending so much time at the pub the two would tie in nicely.

I really hope you get it sorted, life is far to short to be existing in a relationship like this, you and your children deserve better.

djdido2

Well in 24 hours the dynamics have changed dramatically. I told him that he is no use to us and there is no point in him being here as he contributes nothing financially or emotionally to this family.

Typical behaviour that I have seen time and time again, his reply was that I am getting rid of him because the baby I am carrying is not his (how predictable, I expected this type of reaction). This is from a 48 year old guy, who I have come to realise is never going to grow up and take any responsibility in life.

I feel an huge sense of relief. (He did not come home last night) and am shocked at how calm I feel at what the future holds for us. I think all the lovely replies and support here has really helped, so thank you.

Probably be on here quite alot now as I am gonna be a single parent to three kids with a mortgage yikes:eek: