Is DD's friend a thief?

Sambucus_Nigra

pupsicola wrote: »

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Hate to burst your bubble, but the majority of people on here dont agree with you.

Ooh - I missed that survey.....*goes off to look

valkirn

ViolaLass wrote: »

I wouldn't call the police, not so much because of her age but because it's not a great amount of money (OK, it's a lot to the daughter, but not to the rest of us) and it's only happened once.

It may not be alot of money to you but if those vouchers added up to say a min of £20 plus the £5 in coins, thats then what the parents will have to give her to replace it, I dont know about you be while i'd willingly give that to daughter so she didnt have to miss out £25 is alot of money in this house.

I would phone the girls parents and ask them to look for the purse and ask their daughter, and mae the pasing comment "im going to have to report it stolen to the police and gt he vouchers stopped!" and see if that makes them come forward.

Then refuse point blank to have her in my house again

ViolaLass

valkirn wrote: »

£25 is alot of money in this house..

I meant in the context of the sorts of things the police are there to deal with. By all means refuse to have her in the house again (I might do the same) but involving the police before you've even spoken to the parents is OTT. You have to at least give the parents a chance.

Anyway, as I said before, any chance we might all wait for the OP to report what the girl's parents have said/done before we decide she should be hanged? Don't you think the police would say the same thing?

toniq

I would never have spoken to the child either by phone or face to face, I would speak to the parent only.

I always saw it as not my place to start inquistioning someone elses child, so would rather the parents have the facts and they deal with it.

Not saying speaking to the child was wrong, it's just something I wouldn't do.

Sambucus_Nigra

toniq wrote: »

I would never have spoken to the child either by phone or face to face, I would speak to the parent only.

I always saw it as not my place to start inquistioning someone elses child, so would rather the parents have the facts and they deal with it.

Not saying speaking to the child was wrong, it's just something I wouldn't do.

I believe the OP's DD rang her friend and asked.....not the OP herself.

Spendless

sjc3 wrote: »

I disagree, its not an over-reaction. If OP's daughters friend has taken the purse with £5 and two new look vouchers that is potentially alot of money. I wouldn't stand for anyone coming into my house and stealing something.

Just because she is 13 she cant get away with it. The police would only have a word with her at that age if things got that far. Might save her alot of grief in future if she learns early that theft has serious consequences.

I've hi-lighted the most important part of your post. Currently the OP has no proof that DD's mate did it, it looks likely yes, but she didn't see it happen, for that reason you can't go in all guns blazing.

I assume the bags lining has been checked to make sure there's no tear that the purse could slip down? That's if it's a slim wallet purse rather than a 'chunky' one. That it's been checked that DD's mate didn't knock it out of the bag when she got her own purse out and it's fallen somewhere or something has been placed on top of it?

*max*

pupsicola wrote: »

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Hate to burst your bubble, but the majority of people on here dont agree with you.

Actually, I do agree with him(or her!)! I think the OP has done the right thing in having her daughter call her friend first, then call the the girl's parents herself.

I think the situation can still be salvaged, as long as the girl's parents do the right thing too by taking appropriate measures to find out the truth and to discipline their daughter (*if* she did it - innocent till proven guilty!). There is absolutely no need of the Police at this stage, very little is known.

sjc3

Spendless wrote: »

I've hi-lighted the most important part of your post. Currently the OP has no proof that DD's mate did it, it looks likely yes, but she didn't see it happen, for that reason you can't go in all guns blazing.

I assume the bags lining has been checked to make sure there's no tear that the purse could slip down? That's if it's a slim wallet purse rather than a 'chunky' one. That it's been checked that DD's mate didn't knock it out of the bag when she got her own purse out and it's fallen somewhere or something has been placed on top of it?

I wouldn't call the police till I knew she had done it for certain, by speaking with her parents and finding out for sure. Once I had proof then I personally would call the police if anyone stole from my house. It has nothing to do with all guns blazing as you put it. If you bothered to read post 12 you would see that. Too busy highlighting one word in a post I write to get your facts straight.

Spendless

sjc3 wrote: »

I wouldn't call the police till I knew she had done it for certain, by speaking with her parents and finding out for sure. Once I had proof then I personally would call the police if anyone stole from my house. It has nothing to do with all guns blazing as you put it. If you bothered to read post 12 you would see that. Too busy highlighting one word in a post I write to get your facts straight.

I hi-lighted one word in your post because that is the most important part. You have to find out IF a theft has taken place first.

Currently the only facts are OP saw DD's purse and next time it was missing.

sp1987

Give the parents a chance to talk to her and/or turn her room upside down if appropriate to find/not find it.

Did your daughter have more money than she did? Was there a reason for the friend to feel the 'need' to steal from your daughter? I certainly do not excuse stealing, but I am curious if there was a disparity between them and friend stole through jealousy. Someone stole my phone from my bag once in school and as I never found out who, I am curious whether they just wanted it (because they could never have kept it or sold it to anyone we knew) or they just didn't want me to have it. Either way some people are just plain odd, age irrelevant.