Is DD's friend a thief?

sjc3

From the way your daughters friend reacted when you phoned her it looks like she has a guilty conscience. She will be expecting this to go further.

Thing is if you have phoned and left a message and her parents aren't home she will just delete the message. They may be none the wiser to it all.

I would go round to her house with your daughter and speak to the girls parents. People are generally far less rude and are unable to cut you short if you deal with them face to face. Bet that purse is back in your daughters hands in no time.

bizzybee

Is it possible that it fell out of or was taken from DD's bag after she left the house? Could it be in the car or have dropped elsewhere though before you ring the girls parents?

No, after they got back from shopping, the bag with the purse remained on the coffee table until DD went to get her purse out of it.

go_cat

If you are absolutely sure it hasn't fallen out and been kicked under somewhere near your coffee table by mistake then why not threaten police involvement it may be enough to scare her into an admission if indeed she did take it

sjc3

How well do you know your daughters friends family? Are they likely to listen to what has happened and approach things properly, or fly off the handle and tell you to do one?

I really feel for your daughter, what a horrible experience for her. Then again what you do next has to be handled right. This is a lesson for her in how to stand up for yourself and deal with difficult situations.

I wouldn't leave it too long to establish the facts. The more time is left the harder this is going to be to prove.

Does your daughter have a mobile? She could text her friend and say she doesn't believe her by the way she reacted when phoned. Someone who is innocent would have been concerned and chatted with a friend and reassured her not hurriedly say no and hung up on them.

jinky67

go_cat wrote: »

If you are absolutely sure it hasn't fallen out and been kicked under somewhere near your coffee table by mistake then why not threaten police involvement it may be enough to scare her into an admission if indeed she did take it

slight over-reaction!

sjc3

I disagree, its not an over-reaction. If OP's daughters friend has taken the purse with £5 and two new look vouchers that is potentially alot of money. I wouldn't stand for anyone coming into my house and stealing something.

Just because she is 13 she cant get away with it. The police would only have a word with her at that age if things got that far. Might save her alot of grief in future if she learns early that theft has serious consequences.

jinky67

sjc3 wrote: »

I disagree, its not an over-reaction. If OP's daughters friend has taken the purse with £5 and two new look vouchers that is potentially alot of money. I wouldn't stand for anyone coming into my house and stealing something.

Just because she is 13 she cant get away with it. The police would only have a word with her at that age if things got that far. Might save her alot of grief in future if she learns early that theft has serious consequences.

might be better to speak to her parents and ask them instead of blowing things totally out of proportion

Do you really think kids are stupid enough to believe the Police would even care about such a small amount of money?

go_cat

jinky67 wrote: »

might be better to speak to her parents and ask them instead of blowing things totally out of proportion

Do you really think kids are stupid enough to believe the Police would even care about such a small amount of money?

But they need to have morals and learn right from wrong . At 13 she should not even be aware of how the police MAY view this crime but be worried enough to admit her wrongs

sjc3

jinky67 wrote: »

Do you really think kids are stupid enough to believe the Police would even care about such a small amount of money?

Which is why so many start off committing petty theft that then escalates. It doesn't effect me how the OP handles it. I just came here to give my opinion, as did you. Lets agree to disagree

ViolaLass

go_cat wrote: »

But they need to have morals and learn right from wrong . At 13 she should not even be aware of how the police MAY view this crime but be worried enough to admit her wrongs

Why not leave it up to her parents?

If I were the girl's mother and the OP went straight to the police instead of telling me (and then the police turned up at my house) I would be incredibly embarrassed. I don't see that there's anything to be gained here from going in heavy handed when for all we know, the girl's parents may deal with the situation perfectly well. They should certainly be given the chance.