How would you respond to this email, Brothers wedding invite?

Nicki

There could be any number of reasons why the wedding is no children, from cost to the happy couple experiencing fertility problems and not wanting to be reminded of this on their day. I personally would have no problems abiding by their wishes, and would either go or not go depending on whether I could get a babysitter and how far I had to travel and the age of my children.

I am flabbergasted by the poster who would ignore the request and take her child anyway. What exactly does she think her child would get out of the experience of being an uninvited and unwelcome guest at a wedding? These things are boring enough for children without being the only child there and clearly an afterthought, if not outright asked to leave. To say nothing of how little she thinks of her brother to spoil his day in this way.

For the OP in this thread, as others have said it is a blanket request not one directed only at you. Your OP makes it clear that you rarely see or speak to your brother and his fianc! so just because you are related it doesn't make you close to them. I don't think you have any entitlement to have your children invited to be honest. Whether you decide to go or not go, please try not to create a family rift over this issue. Weddings are stressful enough without having to deal with long term fall out from family members!

Kimberley82

Oh get over yourself, its their wedding they can do what they want, it seems like you just want to cause trouble, looking for something to be !!!!ed off at.

Apricot

Mme.Hibou wrote: »

If one of my brothers announced they were getting married, and they stipulated no children, if I was to attend (which I would) I would take my child with me. I'd be devastated if my brothers (or my sister) didn't want their nephew there.

Can't believe people would have such a blatant disregard for someone elses wishes. Glad Im not your sister!

Torry_Quine

treetrunks wrote: »

i dont know my brother or sisters address, i visit often and know exactly where they live but couldnt tell you the house number of street name to be honest. Think thats reflective of the modern age.

Well I for one think that is very sad and strange. If you don't know their address then obviously you don't send cards for any occasion such as birthdays etc. If that's the modern age, I'm out!

Fuzzy_Duck

For those of you who find it offensive that someone doesn't invite their nephews/nieces to their wedding, you have to keep in mind that if the couple specify children who can come (or in Mme.Hibou's case, turn up with your child anyway), they're going to offend a lot more people.

It's clear from the thread that the majority of people (including parents) are fine with the idea of a childless wedding. However I can imagine any parent would be ticked off being told they couldn't bring their kids to a wedding to find several other people's there. After all, they don't know such-and-such dragged her kid in anyway or the bride and groom were guilt tripped into inviting their nephews/nieces.

Just because someone wants to have a wedding without kids doesn't mean they don't love their child relatives. It's their wedding and if they fancy a child-free day (because that's what it is, one day that means a lot to them and little to your kids) so be it.

It is an awkward date, especially if you live far away, but at least they have sent a tactful email way in advance if you should wish to arrange child care.

Kimberley82

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Well I for one think that is very sad and strange. If you don't know their address then obviously you don't send cards for any occasion such as birthdays etc. If that's the modern age, I'm out!

I am the same as the person you quoted, I dont send cards etc as I give them in person, we see each other a lot

Torry_Quine

Kimberley82 wrote: »

I am the same as the person you quoted, I dont send cards etc as I give them in person, we see each other a lot

So do I actually but need an address if for instance I send a postcard on holiday and still think it's nice to get cards in the post.

Thmas_Covenant

True, their wedding their choice. However, I believe a truly thoughtful person would consider close family with children and invite the kids too, who I am sure would like to celebrate, get dressed up and have a boogey as much as the adults.
We had a similar thing with my best friend's wedding, hundreds of miles away, where kids weren't invited (aside from their own 3 young kids) and it coincided with our little one's birthday. We were really disappointed that we couldn't take her, so had to decline the invite which was a huge shame. I suppose they could have made an exception, but if they were on a budget they had to either have kids or not to be fair to everyone, and each table place costs money.
If you want to go, see if you can get a babysitter, to not go may cause a rift which as someone else said, probably isn't worth it.

brians_daughter

TonyDebs wrote: »

Hi ya,

got a text message - number not known to me - saying "Hey , Its Christine - long time no see - how is everything? Would you be able to let me have your email address so Bob and I can send one about the wedding. thanks!x"

So I texted back - "our email address is......."

This is the email we just recieved.

Evening,

We are getting married on December 23rd and would love you to be able to attend. We have decided to make the wedding adults only so that you can don your dancing shoes and keep your hands full with glasses of bubbly in an adult-only zone (we're sure your little ones would prefer to stay in waiting for father christmas!).

Please would you be able to reply to this with your postal address so that we can pop your invite in the post )

Love

C & B x

What do you think?? Nothing stranger than families is there??

Bearing in mind that they were invited and attended our wedding last year with our children age 6 and 10, and we thought that they enjoyed themselves.
They seem to be very busy people that are always out making money, we live one end of the country and they live the other.
As far as we know we have said nothing unkind about them, we dont have much contact.Because we have children and they seem to enjoy the good life, no kids etc.
What do you think the underlining message of this email is???, and how should we respond??

Thanks

a very confused couple...lol

TBH i find this kind of invite is becoming standard these days (IMO)... the last time i enquired why no children i was told incase they spoiled the wedding video!

Infact, we have been invited to 4 weddings so far this year (3 of the couples have children) and 3 were no children invited.

Its each to their own, its their wedding day and (fingers crossed) they will only do it once. They have prob paid £1,000s for the event and want it how they want it. They have given plenty notice, so i would take it at face value.. they simply dont want children there. personally a wedding isnt a wedding without children, but as i say its each to their own

Mme.Hibou

I suppose I can say what I did because I know it would never happen. I'm talking about my own brothers and sister here. Thankfully they love their nephew enough to invite him.