How would you respond to this email, Brothers wedding invite?

danielley

As others have already said, its quite common for child free weddings nowadays.

I also agree that it seems that they have sent the same message to everyone, so I dont think its a dig at your children.

I hope that you are able to make it, but if not, I'm sure they will understand.

x

podperson

I think you might be reading too much into this. They have sent an email round to give people a 'heads up' on the no-children policy before the offical invites go out. It seems like they have tried to keep it light in the hopes that people won't be offended by this - but at the end of the day it is their wedding and they have made the decision to have it as child-free. I'm sure this doesn't mean they didn't enjoy your wedding but as you said they have a different lifestyle to you and their wedding is going to reflect that.
As to responding, that depends on whether you want to go without the children or not. If you feel it's too far away or too close to xmas to be away from the children then that's your decision (would you really want to have been trekking the kids across the country on xmas eve anyway?)

Princess_Coupon

Seems to me they are excluding all children not just yours

thorsoak

TonyDebs wrote: »

Hi ya,

got a text message - number not known to me - saying "Hey , Its Christine - long time no see - how is everything? Would you be able to let me have your email address so Bob and I can send one about the wedding. thanks!x"

So I texted back - "our email address is......."

This is the email we just recieved.

Evening,

We are getting married on December 23rd and would love you to be able to attend. We have decided to make the wedding adults only so that you can don your dancing shoes and keep your hands full with glasses of bubbly in an adult-only zone (we're sure your little ones would prefer to stay in waiting for father christmas!).

Please would you be able to reply to this with your postal address so that we can pop your invite in the post )

Love

C & B x

What do you think?? Nothing stranger than families is there??

Bearing in mind that they were invited and attended our wedding last year with our children age 6 and 10, and we thought that they enjoyed themselves.
They seem to be very busy people that are always out making money, we live one end of the country and they live the other.
As far as we know we have said nothing unkind about them, we dont have much contact.Because we have children and they seem to enjoy the good life, no kids etc.
What do you think the underlining message of this email is???, and how should we respond??

Thanks

a very confused couple...lol

There you are - simples! They've sent the same email out to everyone, and want the addresses back by email so that they can give the resulting list to someone in order to send out all the invites!

No underlying message - they're giving you plenty of notice AND warning you at the outset that this is going to be a no children wedding - so you'll have plenty of time to organise childcare if you wish to attend/think up valid reasons not to go if that is your wish!

Personally, I love to see children at a wedding - but a lot of brides & bridegrooms prefer that they have a really sophisticated "do" without children being present .....wonder how many children will be at the Do in Westminster at the end of April ?:D

Don't take offence - I'd be 99.99% certain that none is intended.

peachyprice

The only confusing thing is that you're confused. It's clearly a round robin email they've sent to everyone.

They have no children and don't want them at their wedding, what's more to say?

Unless they don't have your postal address you do not need to respond at all, if they don't you reply with your address.

POPPYOSCAR

lucylucky wrote: »

No-one seems to see any underlying message which is good.

I would just reply as you see fit.

I quite agree.

The only problem I can see is the date.If you live at opposite ends of the country this would prove very difficult without staying over and I for one would not want to be away from my children at this time.

pokerpad

Rubbish like this makes me happy my gf would like a quiet wedding - probably abroad and minimum people and fuss. I hate how people are expected to be invited and have things done how they would like. It's about them not you and they don't want kids screaming and crying. I don't see what the issue is either...

londonlass001

I agree with others that this seems to be a round robin email sent to everyone. Is this what has disconcerted you? Did you expect something more personal as you are family although not close?

Just on a slightly different note, I hope you've changed details such as names etc as I would hate for your sil-to-be or brother to recognise themselves being discussed if they were to come across this site.

dizziblonde

They've sent a "headsup invite incoming" email to everyone (kind of along the lines of Save the Dates but electronic and moneysaving) and then the posh invites will be coming in due course... which is pretty standard although there are variations along the lines of fridge magnets, cards, text messages, being a cheap organised git and just doing the invites out really early (I did this one). Seems sensible while doing that to put the line in getting the double-checked on addresses as well - so the invites go to the correct places if people moved during recent times and the like.

The no kids at weddings thing - they're paying, their wedding, their rules. Go if you want to, don't go if you don't want to but don't go down the hysterical bullying/armtwisting/emotional blackmail thing some consider to be perfectly acceptable to those arranging weddings (and don't bring a baby along to a no-kid wedding knowing that the bride and groom won't be able to make a scene and turn you away on the day like a relative did at mine). They're under no obligation to revolve their entire universe around your family and some people don't want kids at their wedding - that's life - no one's forcing you to go.

floss2

TBH it sounds like they have sent a blanket email to everyone on their long list, to narrow it down to those who want to be there, whilst checking that they have everyone's correct home postal address so they can send formal invitations out to those who want to be there.

Just because they enjoyed themselves at your wedding - with children there - doesn't mean that they want exactly the same for their day. My best friends got married recently and the invite said no children other than bride / groom's children & grandchildren. It is not an uncommon thing nowadays, what matters is that the couple marry the way they want, with the guests who they want and who want to be there.

Personally, I think your post seems to imply you won't be going because they don't want children there, not that you will be going because it's your brother and you don't see him very often because you both lead different lives.

What does your husband think?