My partner has spent our savings!

jak

Thanks...I just bought him Martins book. Money well spent I reckon!

climbgirl

ZTD wrote:

To be frank - in this case it's not the amount that was spent, but the manner in which it was obtained for spending.

He cancelled the standing order - this shows planning and forethought.
He told the OP he'd sold a bond - to construct a cover story for the additional spending.

Tell me again how thinking in NZ dollars makes you do these things.

It doesn't necessarily - but equally it doesn't mean that he's acting out of malice. From what the OP's said, it sounds more like he's just acted thoughtlessly without thinking properly of the consequences of cancelling the standing order, selling the bond.

Just like loads of people here didn't think of the consequences when they signed the consolidation loan.

I think people are being far too quick to judge this guy.

jak

Only time will really tell supose. If he doesn't do it again, we'll be ok. Never been very patient tho....that's why debts annoy me, they can't be instantly wiped! I wish.

victory

He has to promise though not to do it again, to think before he spends, to ask you, to make absolute sure you both know what you are spending it on and why, if he cannot then you have to be fully responsible for all the finances and make sure that he has only 'pocket moey' to spend.
Debt is not a nice place to be, happy when you spend yes but then come the bills ....

tomstickland

He was the one who insisted on a big wedding, not me.

I thought you wanted the perfect wedding from the earlier posts.

I'm prepared to think that he's just been a bit silly and spent £250 per month, that's around £60 per week overspend.

Then again, minor alarm bells are ringing about your marriage plans. Are you really sure that this is the right thing to be doing in the long term?

jak

I am sure I love him and I want to marry him. Not very sure about our financial future now. Needs to be addresssed

Bambam

climbgirl wrote:

Oh come on, I think some people are jumping to a few wild conculsions here, suggesting drug and gambling problems! The OP has said her partner thinks it went on a few dvds here, nights out. I'd say it was very, very easy to fritter away £1500 over 6 months

I think I agree with you climbgirl. £250 per month works out at approx. £62 per week and if he has been buying CD's and DVD's and taking Jak out for the occasional meal £62 won't really go that far (have you seen the price of drinks :eek: ). Yes, £62 is a lot of money if you haven't got it to spend but let's keep things in perspective. I'm not trying to make excuses for this guy, I think what he's done to Jak is despicable. However, he did own up to his mistakes rather than be 'found out.' You need to clear the air and TELL him you are going to be the banker in the household. He may even relish the idea that he won't have to worry so much about money.

jak

Do you think so? He will give me his money to look after but is that going to teach him anything? Mind you...if he's only got £10 to spend a week, he'll soon learn the value of money I suppose.

ZTD

climbgirl wrote:

Just like loads of people here didn't think of the consequences when they signed the consolidation loan.

Agreed - but why the denial/lies?

The pretense of having done nothing wrong was carried up into today.

jak wrote:

He's gone to get the rest of themoney out! Got to say, I don't think there's any left. He's not very keen... sh**ing himself to be precise.

Not very ready with the truth is he?

climbgirl wrote:

I think people are being far too quick to judge this guy.

jak wrote:

It's all gone. £1500. Oh my god. I'm not surprised which is scary. Feeling very sorry for myself now!

Now to me, there being no money at all implies that the standing order was killed very quickly, if it had existed at all. Which then implies that he had no intention of there being any savings.

Does that seem a reasonable conclusion?

jak

The standing ordr was set up. I was there when he did it. Don't know when it was cancelled. Going to find out tonight. Not very ready with the truth and scared as hell i'd throw him out on his ear. Not that I have. And I won't as long as he sorts it out. And doesn't lie. Anymore. To. Me.