Am I being silly getting upset by this?

jackieglasgow

I gave up reading past the first page, so I am sorry if I am repeating things. Your sister is a sh.t stirrer, I take it she enjoyed making you feel inadequate as a child? As for the jewellery, does your husband realise such things are important to you, and can he afford to buy you them? Have you bought him something significant for your anniversaries?

redpete

dandy-candy wrote: »

Am I being silly?

I think so. How about a different example to balance against your sister's (daft) eternity ring after 3 years?

We've just bought a diamond ring for my wife, the first I've ever bought her (the 'engagement' ring was an heirloom from her family because we couldn't afford a nice one at the time). This after 31 yrs of marriage. It's actually the ring I promised her as a silver anniversary present.

To balance it even further, although the ring is expensive 70% of the payment is in Tesco vouchers!

p-pincher

What would an eternity ring prove, he's married you and you've had kids together, doesn't that show his love. Surely you know your sisters stirring, i do understand i've got a sis thats exactly the same so just ignore her. My dh would never think to but me a ring (would get confused about sizes, style, colour), weve been together 13 yrs and married for a month and i think ive has 2 bunches of flowers (when i gave birth) in that whole time. But then again I cant really complain for our last valentines day I bought him a dartboard. The only way ive got him to buy me any kind of jewellery was to but a pandora charm bracelet a couple of years ago.

butterflylady

Hi,

I haven't read all of the replies but I wanted to give you my experience. I wanted and I mean really wanted an enternity ring, a bit of back ground here: my OH has never choosen and bought me a ring of any kind!! I have an engagement ring which my MIL choose and paid for (long story) and a triology of rings which i choose.

I hoped and dropped hints during my first pregnancy that I would love to be presented with an eternity ring after the birth. He obivously (sp) didn't pick up on the hints!! Durning my second pregnancy OH's brother gave his wife an eternity ring, total surprise, which brought the issue up again, I said how much I would like one, lots of comments from other family members.

Nothing else was said, a few months after the birth we meet in town and walked by the jewelers (sp) OH asked me to show him the ring I liked and I did, he said lets try it on, so I did. Me all excited, looking back now all he was, was exhausted from work, he bought the ring but to be honest it means nothing!!

I honestly beleive that he didn't want to buy it, he just did it for a quiet life. This makes me so sad, I don't wear the ring it sits somewhere gathering dust!! If I could take it back I would. I wanted the surprise the romance, not sulky and pressured!!

MadDogWoman_2

I think you're feeling very emotionally fragile at the moment and would ignore your sister.

I do have an eternity ring but I wear in on my right hand and my fingers are too short for 3 rings on one finger. We bought it together to mark our 5th wedding anniversary, also to acknowledge the tough times we had been through with more to come, we were also 4 years into fertility treatment. It also marks that our sad times were nearly over.

I didn't get a gift when our DD was born, but I did get a very hands on dad which I appreciate much more.

vesper

I think it all depends what you want. Do you really want an Eternity ring?
My OH didn't get me an engagement ring until 4 years after he had proposed to me. Luckily I didn't mind as I ended up with the most beautiful ring I could have chosen. I am not into bling or things like that and only wear jewellry that means something to me. I think in the 8 years we have been together he has only bought me two bits of jewellry, my engagement ring and a crystal ring that cost about £3 (it was more about where it was bought from than what it is).
I have never been bought flowers but then I am not like that again. Instead he does sweet little things that may mean nothing to other people but do to me. Such as I found my favourite childhood teddy the other day but it was really mucky after having spent about 13 years in a drawer. When I got home from work he had washed it and left it in a place I could see it as soon as I walked in from work. Or he buys me a little bar of chocolate when I am feeling down.
Most people wouldn't appreciate being given Recipe books for xmas but I loved it as I adore cooking, which he knows.
What I am getting at is that it doesn't mater what he gives you. Its only an object after all, its how its given to you, or the idea behind the gift. I would rather have a memory or a simple gift than a bit a jewellry.