Struggling mum of 2 - where do I turn for help??

eyeinthesky

Real men look after their children! Tell this pathetic tit that he will be paying maintenance, one way or another, and if he refuses to pay his share of the mortgage, then you will also. Your mortgage is a joint one, and that means your are both responsible for it, jointly and severally. You will both be pursued for it, but with his income, he will be pursued harder. As others have said, do not move out, come hell or high water!

sandraroffey

the fact he has taken struff personal to you and shown it to others albeit the CAB, you must now find a way of changing the locks. what else has he taken that YOU dont know about?????? bank statements??? letters??? how do you know what he has taken. you didnt know he had taken a pay slip!!!! get those locks changed.

demir2424

Things just get better and better.

Spoken to citizens advice yesterday - they have advised me to sell the house and put my name on the free housing list, no help really. They just said that I cannot posibly afford to live in this house and the kids will get used to a new home as they are young.

My first maintenance payment was due on monday 17th - I am now overdrawn and still waiting on this payment.

My 'new job' is now turning into as joke - I start next month whether I like it or not 5 days a week doing phlebotomy (bloods and bp) - just sorted a 5 day placement at nursery after 2 months of struggling to find anywhere with a baby place. I can pay half days for the eldest but must pay full day fees for the baby, there are no ofsted childminders available according to my ofsted
co-ordinator in a 5 mile radius of where i live until may 2013.

My full time childcare, including a 7% sibling discount and 15 hours free for 3 year old comes to a total of 276 pounds a week. I have paid a one weeks deposit to secure these places.

My boss tells me yesterday my new hours are monday to friday - 8am to 11am. Only 15 hours a week - I am so angry. I have asked to speak to the senior partner in the practise on monday to ask for extra hours doing anything as I am not classed as working doing 15 hours and cannot claim wtc or ctc.
After all this training I am better off doing my cureent job and hours eventhough it is less money per hour. Life just get better and better each week x

alexandra_cmpbll

hi , glad you went to cab. Did you discuss with them what he did, taking your payslips etc and the reason for him doing this. Please phone shelter regarding your position with regard to selling your house. Have you contacted womens aid yet. I still say, drawing on my own experience, youd be better trying to stay where you are. There will be help available to you. As to your new job, did they not make it clear what the hours were? Hopefully they will be able to find you an extra hour each week, and if not, someone on here will be able to tell you what you will be entitled to claim if you continue doing 15 hours. My own children are well past needing nursery/childcare, so i cant suggest anything, but someone will. x It is hard just now, but things will get better. x

demir2424

CAB weren't much help - they said a benefit check can be done on anybody and can't confirm the story he told the adviser, gave me a complaints form to fill in.
I was given numbers yesterday for shelter - was told no housing help will be available in my current house, bank won't do interest only and I don't qualify for mortgage help as property is in joint names. I was told to go to my local housing office and tell them that I am about to be made homeless.
As for my job I was simply told in November that I would start sometime in the new year doing more hours than the current phlebotomist (she current works 8am - 10.30am and then does admin work until 4)and was I available 5 days a week.

alexandra_cmpbll

I would phone shelter , they are experts on housing. With regard to the maintenance payment, contact the csa and let them know you have not yet received it. I dont know what like the area you are in is like for housing waiting lists/affordable homes. You will find private lets very expensive and they have a lack of security, which means you could be moving frequently. I have experience of this. If you feel like talking anytime inbox me x

alexandra_cmpbll

I have a number for an organisation in england who specialise in housing. If you want it i will pm you it. I dont know if they are near you, but they could give you the number of colleagues they have near you, I have spoken to them before and they are very helpful and supportive. In your last post i read you had been given the number for shelter, was it them that said there was no help available to you?x

NickyBat

Why have you not consulted a solicitor?

demir2424

I am with my second solicitor who has advised me again to sell the house and get on a free housing list - there is not much equity in the house and I can't possibly pay the mortgage on my own.

demir2424

At the moment I am in a situation where I can't sort housing until I know what my job situation is, I can't really commit to anything at work until I know where in the fylde I am going to be living, I can't tackle my credit card debt until I know my housing/work/maintenance situation - it's all a big big mess which is probably why nobody seems to be able to help or guide me.
I feel like a lost cause - everything is getting me so down - now under weekly supervision from my health visitor from my own and my children's emotional wellbeing.
Such a bad parent.