MSE Parents Club Part 15

SugarSpun

Evening all

Kitchen has been cleaned to a barely-acceptable standard, which is still a hefty improvement on the state it was in before I started, I've ordered photobooks of our recent family photoshoot and done a bunch of organisey stuff plus done some searches of houses for sale :j I'm looking at northish of our town because the places there are affordable and still reasonably nice.

I'm hoping some of this decluttering energy comes my way - I have bottles for recycling and glass for the collection bins aplenty but CBA to put clothes on to take anything out today maybe tomorrow.

jakes-mum

Hi Gem, just wanted to say my (now 9) year old son was a total daddys boy from the moment he had a mind of his own and I still remember the hurt feeling when he would literally push me out of the way to get to his dad. Hubby could never see that he was the favoured parent and used to say it was me being 'silly'. Once he turned about 3 suddenly he started to want me to play with him and if he was ever sick only mummy would ever do to make him feel better!
We now have a 2 year old daughter and she is a total mummys girl and she wont give her dad or brother kisses or cuddles unless its on her terms and only wants me. Hubby now recognises that kids do seem to gravitate to one parent and also realises just how painful it is when it isnt you.
Id like to add that my son now hunts me out for hugs and kisses and has to fight his sister to get anywhere near me! So it does get better and really is just his age.
Good luck with your pregnancy and a big hug :grouphug: for next time you feel it getting on top of you

Sid_Wolf

When I was younger I always wanted my mum over my dad, because my dad done most of the punishment (mum worked he stayed at home)

I grew out of it, but can you ask your OH to be more involved with dealing with issues, like if he hurts you get your husband to tell him off too rather than defend him. That way he wont see you as the one who tells him off and dad as the soft touch, because you will both be working together on the same page

gravitytolls

Congrats on the new baby, it is happy news, I promise.

Once you get past the first threeish months, your hormones will settle and from my experience, pregnancy improves depression enormously.

Try to involve your son throughout,he won't understand much, but he will grasp the growing tummy has a bsby inside.

redmel1621

3onitsway wrote: »

Happy 2011 everyone.

Me and the children had a quiet night watching Toy Story 1, 2 and 3 while OH was at work. I let V stay up til gone 9 - but it didn't make her sleep any longer this morning, we were up at 7 as usual.

I think I might take the tree down today to start my decluttering. I've already filled three bin bags this week with too small clothes from the older childrens wardrobes. Mine and OH's wardrobes are next on my list.

I'm determined to only take stuff we need/use when we move house.

Have I missed something?

got-it-spend-it

Evening all. I could really do with some decluttering energy. I am still full of flu', although fingers crossed I think I feel marginally better tonight as I am thinking about tea for the first time in over a week. I really hope that means this is the end of this horrible bug.

I really need to start the mass declutter. I have stacks to ebay, and I'll probably stick a load of stuff on netmums too as we just have too much baby stuff and not enough space.

Actually, I think I'll go and try and dig up the old eBay challenge thread on here if anyone fancies a bit of friendly competition? It's here https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/39805776#Comment_39805776.

Mojisola

gembaxter wrote: »

I love my son so dearly. I was told I couldn't have kids so he is a miracle in my eyes and a product of my loving relationship with my husband. I should make it clearer though that my hubby does an awful lot of the little things like nappy changes at weekends and he puts him to bed with me every night he is home. He is a fantastic father just very scared to discipline and always asks for my advice. He is a nervous parent!

Good luck with following all the good advice given.

I would just add that your OH will have to get his act together at some point, especially now the new baby is on its way. Children need both parents to work together when it comes to discipline - the rules need to be agreed between them and both parents need to implement any consequences when they are broken.

Becles

Well done on the decluttering everyone :cool:

Did a spreadsheet for work and packed up all the samples ready to be collected on Wednesday. I know it's a bank holiday, but they were all stacked on the utility room bench and I want the space so I can do some washing and ironing tomorrow.

Then watched Sunderland demolish Blackburn 3-0 this afternoon and really enjoyed that.

Feel a bit run down as I'm on and it's really heavy, so I'm just going to chill with a film this evening. Opened a lovely bottle of wine yesterday and there's a glass and a bit left, so I'll finish it off.

DancerSupreme

Thank you again everyone. Some fantastic advice and support from everyone. I feel a bit stronger this evening and we had friends over this afternoon. Their 8 month old seemed to completely chill my son out. I think he will love being a big brother.

I must say that I do play with him a lot as I realise it made it look like I ignore him when I don't get my way. He is such a mature and independent 19 month old that I sometimes forget he is in fact so young. He has had a small cuddle with me this evening and I think he has been a bit poorly today so he went to bed with the normal kisses and cuddles.

I seem to have everything else in control - his routine, his independence, his eating that when it comes to something I cannot be the puppetmaster of, his feelings, I suppose I feel a little lost.

It definitely helped to look at him as testing our love than our patience. I felt more of an affection side to his frustration than his need to drive us up the wall.

I have a friend who has tried for years to have a baby to no avail and I always feel guilty because she gets so angry when I don't enjoy being a parent. I get such a kick out of hearing him say things or do things I have taught him but it is so difficult to just drop all the worries of the world and just play with no inhibitions like I would love to everyday.

Today was possibly just a bad day but I can catagorically say that everyone's response has helped to make it easier to cope with. As great as my husband is, he is too close to the picture and sometimes I need people who are detatched for advice. It is lovely to hear stories of children growing up as affectionate and caring individuals after going through similar things at this age. I cannot thank you all enough for your support. A true testiment to what this forum is all about xxxx

got-it-spend-it

I'm very jealous of your wine, Becles. I'm still on anti-biotics so it's been a sober Christmas and New Year for me!