Do you think this is vindictive or am I oversensitive?

GracieP

I agree with the majority that it makes sense to do this photo now so you m-i-l has the picture on her birthday. But why in the name of jiminy cricket is it costing £500? Will the finished photo be made of solid gold?

If they did a more reasonably priced photo now they could also add a voucher for another photo with gran and new bubs at xmas time. Then everyone would be happy.

aliasojo

Gracie, I think it's costing £250? So the OP is paying half of that?

dizzybuff

aliasojo wrote: »

To be fair, it's an anonymous vent though, isn't it? And we're all different.

Yes we are all different , just a matter of respect . Shes 80 , she gave birth to her husband . She may not like her but grin and bear it lassy , as she aint gonna be around for ever .

aliasojo

dizzybuff wrote: »

Yes we are all different , just a matter of respect . Shes 80 , she gave birth to her husband . She may not like her but grin and bear it lassy , as she aint gonna be around for ever .

Obviously I don't know the OP's MIL so she could be a gem in disguise but as a general comment, we will have to agree to disagree on the respect thing. Respect is earned, not given just because of age or who she gave birth to.

dizzybuff

aliasojo wrote: »

Obviously I don't know the OP's MIL so she could be a gem in disguise but as a general comment, we will have to agree to disagree on the respect thing. Respect is earned, not given just because of age or who she gave birth to.

Okay Ill go with that .

Im just very lucky , my MIL has supported me through thick and thin despite being very poorly herself. She has CML ( Cronic mylod lukemia ) which is treatable but terminal . Had a lung removed due to secondry cancer , and still phone me to make sure Im okay . She is a star and the rock of our family . Plus she is good enough to look after our DS when we visit so we can have Us time. So Yep shes earnt my respect , but she did that with very little time of me knowing her. :j

consultant31

dizzybuff wrote: »

Yes we are all different , just a matter of respect . Shes 80 , she gave birth to her husband . She may not like her but grin and bear it lassy , as she aint gonna be around for ever .

Note to self.....must stop dipping in and out of threads.

After reading the bit above, I was imagining dreadful things and had to read all the thread to find out what was going on :rotfl::rotfl:

donquine

My gut feeling is that the OP is understandably protective of her baby - after all, she's still carrying the child - but the MIL's birthday should be about the MIL and not anyone else. As much as I can understand where the OP is coming from, I do also think it's a bit selfish to force an old lady to delay her celebrations until a new baby comes on the scene. A due date can mean very little - if a baby doesn't want to come out, he or she will just stay put.

I know there will be a lot of posters here who think 80 is nothing at all, but my family tend not to be long lived and I would be concerned that the MIL might drop dead between now and the baby being born and having asked for the photoshoot to be delayed, a lot of bad feeling would end up at the OP's door. From the throwaway hag comment, not having that last big photo might mean very little to the OP, but from all the fuss, I gather the SIL and OH at the very least are quite fond of her. It's not really a situation I'd want to risk occuring.

OP, the MIL's 80th is a big deal - so is your new baby, but the two don't necessarily have to be celebrated at the same time. Hope the meal tonight went well.

thorsoak

One thing that should not be forgotten : when our children grow up and marry we too become Mothers-in-Law. Remember that in 5, 10, 15 years, we too could have people referring to us as "that venemous old bat"!!!

My motto, speak as I would wish others to speak about me, behave as I wish others to behave to me, and, as the mother of three sons ....BITE MY TONGUE!!! After all, my sons should all have very good taste in women - I raised 'em

And I do think that my DILs and my SIL are absolutely wonderful and I love them dearly.!

izzybusy23

Ex-Spendaholic wrote: »

The term "old hag" was just a random figure of speech I didnt realise it would result in a complete psychoanalysis. I'll go change it to lovely lady - or maybe not.

Leave it as it is hun!!! I could call my ex MIL alot worse, believe me!

cattkitt

thorsoak wrote: »

One thing that should not be forgotten : when our children grow up and marry we too become Mothers-in-Law. Remember that in 5, 10, 15 years, we too could have people referring to us as "that venemous old bat"!!!

My motto, speak as I would wish others to speak about me, behave as I wish others to behave to me, and, as the mother of three sons ....BITE MY TONGUE!!! After all, my sons should all have very good taste in women - I raised 'em

And I do think that my DILs and my SIL are absolutely wonderful and I love them dearly.!

I'm sorry, but I am not going to let another woman try to kiss me on my lips on the offchance that I may decide to do that to my DILs in the future.