Do you think this is vindictive or am I oversensitive?

Fleago

It's your MIL's 80th birthday and I can see the point of wanting to give the gift actually on her birthday, not several weeks later. So yes, I do think you are being over sensitive.

msb5262

Fleago wrote: »

It's your MIL's 80th birthday and I can see the point of wanting to give the gift actually on her birthday, not several weeks later. So yes, I do think you are being over sensitive.

I agree with this - especially bearing in mind that even if your baby is born on the due date, you probably won't want to be photographed within the first few weeks after giving birth.
I know I always felt and looked pretty messy/tired/enormous for at least a couple of months after I gave birth!
So it could be around 3 months after the birthday itself..and as an earlier reply said, it's not about you, or your baby, or even your SIL.
It's about your MIL.
MsB

mrcow

It's just a photo. Really not a big deal.

If you don't even like your mother in law, which is how it's coming across; why would you even care what's on her wall?

Get a separate photo taken at a different time if it's an issue for you. It doesn't sound like anyone is "being vindictive". Buying something for an 80 year old isn't always easy. This sounds like a good gift. And no - a bunch of flowers and a voucher isn't the same.

margaretclare

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

More worrying is the way in which you refer to your MIL as "the old hag". Are you sure that it's the SIL who is unpleasant?

I agree. I think this is horrible.

Sambucus_Nigra

msb5262 wrote: »

I agree with this - especially bearing in mind that even if your baby is born on the due date, you probably won't want to be photographed within the first few weeks after giving birth.
I know I always felt and looked pretty messy/tired/enormous for at least a couple of months after I gave birth!
So it could be around 3 months after the birthday itself..and as an earlier reply said, it's not about you, or your baby, or even your SIL.
It's about your MIL.
MsB

It's a photo with the grandkids, not the grown up adults.

Not being funny, but I think the MIL might want her new grandkid in the photo!

MrsE_2

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

It's a photo with the grandkids, not the grown up adults.

Not being funny, but I think the MIL might want her new grandkid in the photo!

But she doesn't have this unborn grandchild on her 80th birthday.

cattkitt

Oh yes. My MIL has 4 DILs, and the vote is unanimous - it would be insulting to old hags to be stuck with the same label as her. It might be that the poor dear has been terribly unlucky with her DILs, or it might be that she really is a terrible so-and-so. You do the odds.

Sambucus_Nigra

MrsE wrote: »

But she doesn't have this unborn grandchild on her 80th birthday.

Agreed; but she might think 'well, if you are spending X on a photoshoot - it would be good to have all the grandkids in it for the sake of a few weeks'.......

However this is probably about one-upmanship on the part of the SIL than anything else, so it's moot.

lors71

sorry Op you are being oversensitive.....her birthday is weeks before the baby is due...its actually a bit rude to suggest she wait for her present 5 or 6 weeks after the event,let it go,smile and pay your half and then get a nice one of your kids inc new baby for her christmas....if your SIL is that bad think of how huffed she will be at grannie having an extra picture of ALL your kids ............let it go you have more inmportant things to worry about im sure x
ps would you be happy if it had been your idea for kids pic and your SIL wa due in 5/6 weeks and sugested waiting,so her newbie could be in it?...:)

cattkitt

The option that appeals to me is having a shot of all the existing grandchildren, grinning at the camera, with you and bump in the middle, with all the children surrounding you, and with a hand on your tummy.

Maybe it's just me, but I think it would be cute and funny.