Has anyone been told the wrong gender at 20 week scan?

smartie12

Well I had about 12/13 scans in total and not once could they see any boy/girl bits. We wanted to find out.... DH was convinced girl, I thought I was destined to just have boys. I called bump he, bought a few "boys" bits and no girlie stuff!

Bump turned out to be a girl and I will now admit it was a lovely surprise!!:j:D:D:D

tiamai_d

coolcait wrote: »

I've heard of a few cases where it has happened - either way.

Personally, I didn't want to know. Dad did, and promised that he wouldn't tell me once he knew. That would have made for a tricky few months!

The hospital had a policy of not telling. Luckily...

Maybe it's because of my own experience and approach to the issue, but I do find some of the posts on this thread difficult to relate to.

If I'm honest, I'll admit to wanting a girl (and being lucky enough to end up with one). However, I knew that I had a 50/50 chance of having a boy. So I dealt with it. And - without knowing what gender my baby would be - I had worked out my own issues about wanting a girl, and was delighted to finally meet the baby I had been waiting for all those months. The fact that she was a girl was a bonus.

The great thing about pregnancy is that it gives you time to prepare yourself. If a woman wants to have a boy, or a girl purely because that's her personal preference - or because she wants to avoid repeating her family's mistakes - she has time to examine those issues, and resolve them, before the baby is born.

As for buying clothes and decorating nurseries, parents have done that for years without having a clue whether the baby is a boy or a girl. Those parents who have space in their homes to create a nursery...

As I see it, the only reason why a paren would need to know the gender of their unborn child would be if the family were carriers of a disease which only affected one gender.

Everything else, however much people understand what is being said, is about personal preferences and choices - and when those choices and preferences are to do with fashion and decor, maybe there is an argument for not telling parents that they're having a .......

I asked about DS1 during his growth scan, 3 days before I was induced. I knew he was a boy and only asked to try and cheer myself up a bit, being in hospital for 2 weeks with pre eclampsia is depressing.

With DS2 I asked at the 20 week scan so that I could try and bond somehow with the parasite inside me that had been making me vomit several times a day (even during my sleep), I was shocked to be told a boy only because the pregnancy had been that different to my first. Luckily I did find some sort of bond with the little illness. I think that was very worthwhile given what I then went through with him.

With DD my consultant wanted to look for the gender (she first asked us if we wanted to know so she could turn the monitor off if need be) because given I had had pre eclampsia twice with two boys, having a girl would potentially lower my chances of getting it again. I knew it was a girl from the moment I found out I was pregnant. I wanted it confirmed due to the high risk of something going badly wrong during the extremely high risk pregnancy.

So, I disagree, there are many valid reasons for wanting to know the sex of your unborn baby. True, in the good old days I wouldn't have been able to find out, but in the good old days I'd have died during pregnancy with my first.

anna25071970

Wow, some of these stories are amazing. Thank you for sharing.

I know with my mum she "knew" my sister was a girl before she was born (many decades ago). She was also so convinced from very very early on that she was carrying twins (me and my brother) that my parents got some sort of insurance you could get at the time for the possibility of twins (this was before scans etc). She ended up having twins and got the equivalent of something like £10k from the insurance company which they put down as a deposit for their first house .

Kit_Kat_Kate

anna25071970 wrote: »

She was also so convinced from very very early on that she was carrying twins (me and my brother) that my parents got some sort of insurance you could get at the time for the possibility of twins (this was before scans etc). She ended up having twins and got the equivalent of something like £10k from the insurance company which they put down as a deposit for their first house .

I had twins last year and I knew I was having twins at 5 weeks before I had my 12 week scan:D I told about 6 people I m sure I m having twins. You can still get the twin insurance.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Have people forgotten that the purpose of the 20 week scan isn't to make the shopping a bit easier, but to check for such little things as the likelihood of the baby actually surviving to the point of needing clothes?

It is a scan to look for major anomalies, and the fussing about the sex of the baby reminds me of spoiled children peeking underneath the wrapping paper of their Christmas presents before December 25.

Anyone who gets upset about whether a baby is a boy or girl should seriously consider whether they are psychologically ready to ever consider having a child.

!!!!!!, surely the important thing is that the babe is alive, not that Nanny can knit a s**ding pink cardie!


[stalks off in a stroppy huff]

BTW, this opinion was shared by the Consultant Obs that I worked for. There are plenty of women who would give anything just to have a baby - any baby - so this fussing is ridiculous.

tiamai_d

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Have people forgotten that the purpose of the 20 week scan isn't to make the shopping a bit easier, but to check for such little things as the likelihood of the baby actually surviving to the point of needing clothes?

It is a scan to look for major anomalies, and the fussing about the sex of the baby reminds me of spoiled children peeking underneath the wrapping paper of their Christmas presents before December 25.

Anyone who gets upset about whether a baby is a boy or girl should seriously consider whether they are psychologically ready to ever consider having a child.

!!!!!!, surely the important thing is that the babe is alive, not that Nanny can knit a s**ding pink cardie!


[stalks off in a stroppy huff]

BTW, this opinion was shared by the Consultant Obs that I worked for. There are plenty of women who would give anything just to have a baby - any baby - so this fussing is ridiculous.

Sorry, I missed the bit that said 'I'm only interested in knowing the sex of my baby at my anomaly scan.'

I for one like the fact that people look forward to seeing their babies and finding out the sex if they wish, rather than spend 16+ weeks worrying about what may be wrong.

If you wanted to take it further, why should people even look forward to having the baby at all? So much could go wrong during the pregnancy, or during labour. Or at the birth. Then there is SIDS, illness, disease... why should we even dream of our children growing up at all?

Lets just all stop getting excited and sit worrying about what could go wrong coz that will make the world a better place.

milliebear00001

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Have people forgotten that the purpose of the 20 week scan isn't to make the shopping a bit easier, but to check for such little things as the likelihood of the baby actually surviving to the point of needing clothes?

It is a scan to look for major anomalies, and the fussing about the sex of the baby reminds me of spoiled children peeking underneath the wrapping paper of their Christmas presents before December 25.

Anyone who gets upset about whether a baby is a boy or girl should seriously consider whether they are psychologically ready to ever consider having a child.

!!!!!!, surely the important thing is that the babe is alive, not that Nanny can knit a s**ding pink cardie!


[stalks off in a stroppy huff]

BTW, this opinion was shared by the Consultant Obs that I worked for. There are plenty of women who would give anything just to have a baby - any baby - so this fussing is ridiculous.

I'm not sure many people see the two things (anomaly checks and finding out the sex) as an either/or scenario. It's usually perfectly possible to do both without any problem.

looby75

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Have people forgotten that the purpose of the 20 week scan isn't to make the shopping a bit easier, but to check for such little things as the likelihood of the baby actually surviving to the point of needing clothes?

It is a scan to look for major anomalies, and the fussing about the sex of the baby reminds me of spoiled children peeking underneath the wrapping paper of their Christmas presents before December 25.

I saw finding out the sex as an added bonus to finding out that my baby was doing well and that everything was in the right place.

I thought I had my heart set on another girl when I was pregnant with ds so when they initially told me that I was having another girl I was delighted. I have a lot of sisters who I am very close to and wanted dd to have the chance of a similar close relationship. The SECOND I found out that I was actually having a boy I didn't care about that, I was just delighted that he was healthy and that I didn't have placenta privia so he could be born safely.

peachyprice

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Have people forgotten that the purpose of the 20 week scan isn't to make the shopping a bit easier, but to check for such little things as the likelihood of the baby actually surviving to the point of needing clothes?

It is a scan to look for major anomalies, and the fussing about the sex of the baby reminds me of spoiled children peeking underneath the wrapping paper of their Christmas presents before December 25.

Anyone who gets upset about whether a baby is a boy or girl should seriously consider whether they are psychologically ready to ever consider having a child.

!!!!!!, surely the important thing is that the babe is alive, not that Nanny can knit a s**ding pink cardie!


[stalks off in a stroppy huff]

BTW, this opinion was shared by the Consultant Obs that I worked for. There are plenty of women who would give anything just to have a baby - any baby - so this fussing is ridiculous.

Sorry, but that is a completely OTT reaction.

The OP asked a specific question regarding whether they were told the wrong sex, not 'What do you think the most important part of a 20 week scan is'

Radsteral

when we went for our scan, the guy there told us its a boy.. you see(and he points somewhere on the screen )
my wife had even spent much time finding the name of the girl so she asks can you show us again as we didnt see?
he says '' well miss here it is again but dont expect a 8 inch long;)
he said we should expect on 23d of june , which i always thought these dates given seem stupid and impossible
But, after too much waiting little Ryan only decided to come out for a drink on the 23d!