Nightmare 15 yr old daughter

Spendless

toadhall wrote:

just found this thread. I have 3 daughters 5,7 and 9 and after reading all your posts I think I'm going to sell them them and get a puppy!

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Sorry but PMSL.

rushnowt

Savvy_Sue wrote:

And rushnowt, I think you're a saint for saying you WOULD put her uniform in the drier. How about next time offering to set her an alarm so she can get up early enough to get it dry before work?

And never mind cost of buying a car, just get a quote for a 17 year old learner driver in ANY car! Makes very little difference whether the car is new or old: the insurance is to cover the damage they do to other people's property, not just their own!

LOL, i know your right i really should be more like that, i guess i'm far to soft with her because of the consequences of making a stand. She knows this all too well, i'm sure of it and plays it to her advantage. I guess when you've been through so much and know whats gonna happen ya lose the will to fight, its an easy option to just let it go rather than having a screaming tantrum off her at midnight, I worry so much about the younger ones seeing and hearing her performance that i try to keep low key, I guess the only winner though is my daughter.

As for the insurance, i dread to think how much it would be, my own insurance is over £300 with years of no claims bonus' and ive been driving for 20 years. i was just gonna give a few a call then to make some enquires but then thought, sod it, why should i, if shes that interested she can do her own ringing around i think i'm learning

rushnowt

toadhall wrote:

just found this thread. I have 3 daughters 5,7 and 9 and after reading all your posts I think I'm going to sell them them and get a puppy!

the 9 year old is already showing hormone signs and i'm not ready for this yet!:(

LMAO if only, my dogs are far better behaved than the kids they do everything first time telling

Spendless

Did she go to work today Rush?

rushnowt

Spendless wrote:

Did she go to work today Rush?

LOL, yep, no illness today it was a miracle i tell ya,

she was actually up and out at 3.15 yesterday just in time to go and meet her mate coming out of work, and strolled back in again at midnight, I wish i got better that quickly lol

nearlyrich

She has this idea in her mind that she's gonna have a sporty little number LOL, didnt we all

My 17 year old daughter was so sure she was going to wake up on her 17th birthday to find a brand new Audi TT with a red bow, on the drive... reality check was the insurance quote of over £7000.

Her birthday present from me was driving lessons and when she passed her test, an older model small car which cost less than £300.

As for the insurance, i dread to think how much it would be

Managed to get that for just under £700 with 1 year breakdown cover and she is getting a 20% reduction as she has passed her Pass Plus.

The deal is she now has to pay for the running costs including tax & insurance when it becomes due and she is supposed to be saving up for this. She has a part time job and hopes to get one with more hours when she is 18, more scope for bar work etc.

So even a small old car will cost about £1000 to put on the road for a new driver, girls get cheaper insurance than boys, my son paid almost twice as much. Driving lessons are around £20 per hour, we got a good deal by paying in 12 hour blocks worked out at £16 per hour, test is about £40 plus the use of the car. Petrol costs depends on where they go but believe me new drivers go everywhere:rolleyes:. DH was just saying she's never in since she started driving.

toozie_2

Hiya Rush

Just got back from a long weekend away, so I've been catching up on my reading here. My daughter has been a star whilst we were away, because a friend of mine (and her God Mother) and her 6 year year old were with us. So she certainly didn't show her aggressive side. Once we got home, we told both daughters how proud we were of their behaviour...which was actually outstanding-far better than being at home!!! 24 hours and school later, household is still in a state of calmness!!!

With regard to the CTF, I wouldn't mention anything about it, and keep the cash seperate from other savings. Once the child is in early teenage years, and if the subject is mentioned, that could be "the savings to help them through college/or buy a car". But I really haven't read up about it at all, coz mine are too old. It seems far easier finantially to have a baby these days, with working families tax credit, nursey fees, CTF, longer maternity pay etc.

Rush

I know this sounds crazy, but have you tried mediatation or yoga, maybe you could practice this when the going gets tough...sort of an inner calmness and all that. Don't know much about these therapies, but whilst you ride this storm, it could help to keep your sanity.

Take care x

Savvy_Sue

toadhall wrote:

just found this thread. I have 3 daughters 5,7 and 9 and after reading all your posts I think I'm going to sell them them and get a puppy!

Spendless wrote:

Sorry but PMSL.

Me too ... youngest would love a cat or dog and thinks either would be more fun than his father, who is allergic to them! So my son regularly suggests that we should swap his father for a pet ... However, if I explain that the deal is to swap him and his brothers for the pet, and NOT their father for the pet, I wonder if he will feel the same way!

Have never told the youngest you can get dogs which don't cause alleriges because they have a different kind of fur ...

Savvy_Sue

Rushnowt, does your daughter not care about disturbing her siblings by throwing a tantrum at midnight? Trust me, I can believe it if she doesn't, my eldest used to be appallingly dissociative, and even now he doesn't care for anyone in a touchy-feely way, but on an intellectual level he realises that we can't all do just exactly what we want because we all want different things!

If you can find a parenting class aimed at teenagers, I would recommend it. It may give you other strategies you can use, but it will certainly give you some more moral support. We wicked mothers must stick together!!!

rushnowt

toozie wrote:

Hiya Rush

Just got back from a long weekend away, so I've been catching up on my reading here. My daughter has been a star whilst we were away, because a friend of mine (and her God Mother) and her 6 year year old were with us. So she certainly didn't show her aggressive side. Once we got home, we told both daughters how proud we were of their behaviour...which was actually outstanding-far better than being at home!!! 24 hours and school later, household is still in a state of calmness!!!

With regard to the CTF, I wouldn't mention anything about it, and keep the cash seperate from other savings. Once the child is in early teenage years, and if the subject is mentioned, that could be "the savings to help them through college/or buy a car". But I really haven't read up about it at all, coz mine are too old. It seems far easier finantially to have a baby these days, with working families tax credit, nursey fees, CTF, longer maternity pay etc.

Rush

I know this sounds crazy, but have you tried mediatation or yoga, maybe you could practice this when the going gets tough...sort of an inner calmness and all that. Don't know much about these therapies, but whilst you ride this storm, it could help to keep your sanity



Take care x

Hiya toozie

I'm so pleased you had a great time, and hopefully the calmness will prevail ive got everything crossed for ya.

I know this is a bit personal, but has she started her periods yet ? could it be that, thats making her irritable and troublesome ? maybe it was a phase she had to go through and she's seen the error of her ways whatever the reason i wish you all the luck in the world and hope things remain just the way they are now. x

I used to do a lot of excersise, but for one reason and another mainly this site lol, i dont get round to it much, maybe i need to take some time out and do it again, but i do find it theraputic being on here lol