Partner is losing battle with cancer and I don't know what to do next

Toomuchdebt

No advice at all here just {{{hugs}}}

r.mac_2

I can't offer any help I'm afraid and can't claim to know what you must be going through. however, may I suggest you contact these people. They offer some wonderful support and space and I cannot recommend them highly enough. I'm not sure where you are based, but I hope they have a centre near you.

http://www.maggiescentres.org/

[Deleted User]

So sorry to hear what you are all going through, I again would suggest MacMillan, they are fantastic. My thoughts are with you all.

digitalphase

I'm so sorry to read this

I hope your wife is able to find some pain relief, and that you and your daughter can treasure the time you have together.

Macmillan would be the first stop I think.

When I lost my Nan and Dad to this cruel disease, I wish I had known about them. It still affects me today, so I'd urge you to make sure your daughter gets to chat to people.

*Louise*

I am so sorry to hear of your situation, I hope you can all get some help through macmillan, particularly your wife for the pain. I have heard they are good with support for carers/family as well.

I read your thread and thought of all the other ones on various parts of this site complaining about insignificant things - perhaps some should take the time to stop and realise how few problems they actually have, I know I am counting my blessings at the moment


(((hugs)))

Indie_Kid

Is there anyone at the hospital who you, your daughter and partner can talk to?

I'm very sorry to hear this - my grandfather has it (I've only seen him once since his diagnosis) and mum says it's awful seeing him the way he is.

NAR

What an awful situation, your wife so ill and in pain and you feel helpless to do anything about it. But you are already doing a lot, you are there for her and your daughter, you are ensuring that she receives all the treatments etc, try not to be so hard on yourself. Try and get some quiet time to yourself and have a good cry - it is not unmanly to do and may let you get rid of some pent up emotions. You have a hard battle ahead of you all, all you can do is try and put on a brave face when it is required and hope that some miracle cure brings her back to you. Good luck.

ERICS_MUM

Another thought - your local hospice might have a specialist nurse or social worker dedicated to helping bereaved/soon to be bereaved children. Very often children don't voice their fears and sadness to their parents for fear of upsetting them) but can open up to a "stranger" . This might help your dear daughter (and help you and your wife too,knowing she is getting her own support).


Linda xxx

ka7e

You have my profound sympathies. Earlier this year my Mum nursed my Dad through terminal cancer and we still can't come to terms with the emotional turmoil it created.

We found MacMillan very hard to pin down in our area. They were still only doing weekly visits when my Dad died of cancer. They were very good at family support though, and offered respite and overnight care when things got really tough. They should also guide you through all financial aid available to you.

Your Palliative care team attached to your GPs surgery should be able to handle all aspects of pain relief. Morphine and Oramorph and alternatives if they become ineffective or unpalatable (their side effects can include shaking and vivid dreams). You can get air mattresses, wheelchairs, commodes ordered through the GP's surgery, too.

I hope you have a good network of friends and family to help support you and your daughter through this terrible time. It does help to have somebody you can confide in how YOU are feeling, we can't all be strong all the time.

tigzem

I couldn't read and run, I'm so sorry for you all. MacMillan are wonderful, I hope that you can get the support you all need. We lost my Auntie back in 2006 and they were amazing.

I too have just counted my blessings. Hugs to you all xx