Am I being awful?

topsym

vaio wrote: »

Don’t see a problem…..

Do invite him up and have a “renew the old friendships, catch up on what has been happening over the last 12 years and meet the families” event. Better still if you can also invite other friends from the same era.

Don’t meet him secretly or I guarantee it will end in tears

I think that is the best idea, I am certainly not a home wrecker, and dont intend to be, but I would genuinely like to see him to satisfy my curiousity, surely i'm not the only person who has thoght this in the past? I cetainly dont want a realationship, just a meeting.

garthdp

Life has moved on for both of you and you are getting in to dangerous territory.Men who have just become fathers often feel excluded from the wifes affections - its very commen.So I would question his motives

Unfinished business is a little fantasy you are playing out in your head.Deal with your own life and not the fantasy one.

pinkclouds

topsym wrote: »

I am not thinking of doing ANY damage, I dont want him, I just want to see him again!

How many pages of "no, don't do it" would you like before you accept that you *are* being awful?

Here's my contribution: NO.

topsym

GEEGEE8 wrote: »

Are you planning to introduce him to your husband?
Are you going to tell your husband you are meeting with someone you slept with at uni?

NO, not introduce them, but I will tell OH we are meeting, but not the ins and out of my university s*x life, too much info

gratefulforhelp_2

vaio wrote: »

Don’t see a problem…..

Do invite him up and have a “renew the old friendships, catch up on what has been happening over the last 12 years and meet the families” event. Better still if you can also invite other friends from the same era.

Don’t meet him secretly or I guarantee it will end in tears

topsym wrote: »

NO, not introduce them, but I will tell OH we are meeting, but not the ins and out of my university s*x life, too much info

........................................................................................

Beast

topsym wrote: »

NO, not introduce them, but I will tell OH we are meeting, but not the ins and out of my university s*x life, too much info

I'm assuming you're an adult so I'm going to make another assumption that you have some level of willpower.

Stop making excuses for your unfaithful wants - if you're going to do it, just go and do it.

If you were my wife, I'd be absolutely furious and hurt.

My_Fathers_Daughter

topsym wrote: »

I think that is the best idea, I am certainly not a home wrecker, and dont intend to be, but I would genuinely like to see him to satisfy my curiousity, surely i'm not the only person who has thoght this in the past? I cetainly dont want a realationship, just a meeting.

I have indeed met up with people from my Uni days and before. In fact one of my Sixth Form male friends messaged me on FB just the other night to see if we could meet up.

Hubby was sat next to me at the time - I told him all about it, I explained all about old friend and how I knew him and what he was like and what he has been up to over the years.

Old friend and I pondered if we could arrange something in the near future, we discussed meeting for lunch so I could take my son with me, we decided we were both a bit busy at the moment and said we would keep in touch and look at meeting later in the year when we had fewer commitments - possibly in London for a show with my hubby and his fiancee...

This is what platonic old friendships look like. If I had been doing it in secret and wanted to meet him in secret my husband would have every right to be livid with me - and I would clearly be unhappy in my relationship.

miserly_mum

topsym wrote: »

NO, not introduce them, but I will tell OH we are meeting, but not the ins and out of my university s*x life, too much info

Whats wrong with inviting him and his family to meet you and Hubby?

p-pincher

Yes you are being awful, you asked for advice and you've been given some very honest answers, obviously no one can tell you what to do but the general feeling seems to be leave well alone but you just seem to want somebody to tell you that you that yes its a great idea and you should go ahead and meet him.

If you cant be honest with your husband about all the facts (ie the ins and outs) then the alarm bells should be ringing. You say you ve got a lovely husband that you love, then prove it. Dont put yourself in a situation where you could be tempted, you want closure, well tough you cant have everything you want in life x

GEEGEE8

miserly_mum wrote: »

Whats wrong with inviting him and his family to meet you and Hubby?

Because she most likely want's to get jiggy with him, even though she is convicing herself that she doesn't / couldn't...