my son wants to get custody for his son

one_hot_minute

Mooloo wrote: »

Once a child is on the Child protection Plan, then the hospital have a duty to call Social Services and tell them that the child is there.
They are supposed to anyway.!

I really hate to say it but that only adds to my belief then that the "facts" we've been given in this thread aren't really very accurate or dare I say slightly exaggerated...

Sorry...

Loopy_Girl

Yeah the hospital have to inform SS....not Granny

Savvy_sewing

nottslass wrote: »

The OP said that heid been given copies of reports that had happend in (in regard to the mother)the past - The son may be entitled to information in regard to his son but would not be party to any infomation in regard to "past events" that concern the babies mother before the child was born.

Actually this information comes up at the Child Protection conferences, and is in the subsequent paperwork. FACT. I have the same sort of information on my grandsons other grandparents.
got to run our Social Worker has just arrived.

nottslass_2

one_hot_minute wrote: »

I really hate to say it but that only adds to my belief then that the "facts" we've been given in this thread aren't really very accurate or dare I say slightly exaggerated...

Sorry...

I agree. SS allegedly have a file full of the mothers failings and are that concerned for the babies welfare that they feel that an 8 week old baby would be better off living with a the OP's family,yet they have not done anything to remove the child from its mothers care. Instead advising that the OP's son applies for a residency order,based on his own evidence of neglect which could take months.

Doesn't add up to me......................

If the babies father is mature enough to take on the responsibility for a child for the next 18 years then he is mature enough to find out the legalities involved without any need for his mother to display the "facts" on a an Internet forum.

Loopy_Girl

blue_monkey wrote: »

The mother was not there - where was she, clearly she was bothered about her child being in hospital.

So if the mother cannot be bothered or is ill - whatever reason - she needs to step aside and let Dad take over.

And where was Dad? In the house sitting whislt his Mum does all the running about and phoning people...hardly smacks of someone that gives a toss either to be honest.

The only reason the OP wasn't there last night was because she had no legal right to be and was asked to stay away else she would have been there sticking her oar in again.

The OP is not 'supporting' her Son - she is taking over this entire thing.

Lets look at the facts

Son get the local 'good time girl' who has a penchant for young lads pregnant when he was 16

Doesn't pay for the baby or regularly take down a pack of nappies and tin of milk a week.

Doesn't want to go to the Mum's flat as he 'gets abuse'

When Baby in care at OP house, it's the OP who does the settling of baby and phoning round and on the phone to SW at every opportunity

This is so devastating for him - but yet is going to manage to his 18th birthday party next week.

Baby in hosp and where is Son? err in the house...He must be on the phone frantic to the hospital though? err no...Mummy is doing the phone calls. Again.

Can't even manage to go to the sols on his own

He probably thinks it's shame for the baby but he is not coming out any better as a sterling parent anymore than the Mother is. He probably only 'wants' custody as he has been told that is what he should be thinking.

Maybe if the OP had been more honest from the start i.e doesn't agree with lifestyle choices of Mother and SHE wants custody then some of the responses would be different

And as for the 'child' comment - don't make me laugh!!! He stopped being a child at 16 when he slept with a 26 year old woman with a reputation and got her pregnant.

lynzpower

nottslass wrote: »

I agree. SS allegedly have a file full of the mothers failings and are that concerned for the babies welfare that they feel that an 8 week old baby would be better off living with a the OP's family,yet they have not done anything to remove the child from its mothers care. Instead advising that the OP's son applies for a residency order,based on his own evidence of neglect which could take months.

Doesn't add up to me......................

If the babies father is mature enough to take on the responsibility for a child for the next 18 years then he is mature enough to find out the legalities involved without any need for his mother to display the "facts" on a an Internet forum.

I think you are missing the point here.

From what we know from what OP has written social workers have sourced a mother and baby placements. Having worked in a setting like this, the purpose of this is for the mother and the baby to move in to assess how well she parents the baby and how she caters for babys needs, physical and emotional.

The mum is refusing to move into this flat and start this assessment in placement.

This to me as an ex-worker, and latterly ex social worker rings further alarm bells.

There are restrictions in these sorts of placements, including the sort of behaviour, visitors, parties, and so on. Maybe its this that the mum doesnt want to give up? Maybe she simply does not want the assessment process and basically being watched caring for the child, because she knows that her care-giving is deficient. Whatever- we can all guess if we like, but the bottom line is that this placement has been sourced to support and assess and she is choosing not to move into the flat.

IME mother and baby placements are really the last chance saloon, many mums leave placement much better parents than when they went in, however, many children are removed from parents in this setting.

So what does that tell you about her motivations, if she is not willing to move into the placement to start that assessment?

Savvy_sewing

We do not know what are the facts. Whether or not the OP is saying it like it is.
The question at the begining was that the Son Wanted Custody, and she wanted to know about that.

The family law solicitor should tell her. The Child Protection meetings, and core group meetings, will give her the advise there. We should not be judging the OP, her son, the mother of the baby, or indeed the other grandmother.
We should be giving advise as to where to go for help.

Slaughtering and slating anyone is not good, healthy or helpful.
I think i have read enough. Sadly if anyone wants my help then they will have to do it off of this thread. As I think we are going nowhere.

Gizmo is the best person to ask. I know that by personal help, in my caring for my granddaughter, and my grandsons being in care elsewhere. (seperate mother).

Good luck is all I can say, and i wish people would stop pulling them all apart!

nottslass_2

lynzpower wrote: »

I think you are missing the point here.

From what we know from what OP has written social workers have sourced a mother and baby placements. Having worked in a setting like this, the purpose of this is for the mother and the baby to move in to assess how well she parents the baby and how she caters for babys needs, physical and emotional.

The mum is refusing to move into this flat and start this assessment in placement.

This to me as an ex-worker, and latterly ex social worker rings further alarm bells.

There are restrictions in these sorts of placements, including the sort of behaviour, visitors, parties, and so on. Maybe its this that the mum doesnt want to give up? Maybe she simply does not want the assessment process and basically being watched caring for the child, because she knows that her care-giving is deficient. Whatever- we can all guess if we like, but the bottom line is that this placement has been sourced to support and assess and she is choosing not to move into the flat.

IME mother and baby placements are really the last chance saloon, many mums leave placement much better parents than when they went in, however, many children are removed from parents in this setting.

So what does that tell you about her motivations, if she is not willing to move into the placement to start that assessment?

I'm not disputing any of the above (if the facts are to be believed)- in fact it reinforces my question as to why social services haven't placed the child in a place of safety already.

Wouldn't her cooperation and assessment of her being in the mother and Baby unit be a "condition" of keeping the child with her and her failure to do so result in an automatic care order ?

In my area mother and baby units aren't a" last chance saloon" for assessment but are more "supported housing"(sil works in one) but I expect this can differ from area to area.
Incidentally the OP mentioned that she was in the process of being evicted from the above due to her partying and not because SS have been unable to asses her.

Lets face it if SS have all of the above as evidence of her refusal to cooperate in addition to the already supposedly "thick file" of evidence against the mother.Then I assume they would be concerned enough for the child's welfare to take the child into care.

nottslass_2

Mooloo wrote: »

We do not know what are the facts. Whether or not the OP is saying it like it is.
The question at the begining was that the Son Wanted Custody, and she wanted to know about that.

The family law solicitor should tell her. The Child Protection meetings, and core group meetings, will give her the advise there. We should not be judging the OP, her son, the mother of the baby, or indeed the other grandmother.
We should be giving advise as to where to go for help.

Slaughtering and slating anyone is not good, healthy or helpful.
I think i have read enough. Sadly if anyone wants my help then they will have to do it off of this thread. As I think we are going nowhere.

Gizmo is the best person to ask. I know that by personal help, in my caring for my granddaughter, and my grandsons being in care elsewhere. (seperate mother).

Good luck is all I can say, and i wish people would stop pulling them all apart!

Perhaps the OP should take note...............................

gizmo111

nottslass wrote: »

I'm not disputing any of the above (if the facts are to be believed)- in fact it reinforces my question as to why social services haven't placed the child in a place of safety already.

I'm curious on that one as well- the SW seem to be giving differing and confusing advice

Wouldn't her cooperation and assessment of her being in the mother and Baby unit be a "condition" of keeping the child with her and her failure to do so result in an automatic care order ?

In my area mother and baby units aren't a" last chance saloon" for assessment but are more "supported housing"(sil works in one) but I expect this can differ from area to area.
Incidentally the OP mentioned that she was in the process of being evicted from the above due to her partying and not because SS have been unable to asses her.

I haven't seen any mention of assessing the mother, let alone her refusing to comply - although I have to say she seems a liitle old for a M&B Unit, they are usually as you say supported housing of a sort for age 16-25

Lets face it if SS have all of the above as evidence of her refusal to cooperate in addition to the already supposedly "thick file" of evidence against the mother.Then I assume they would be concerned enough for the child's welfare to take the child into care.

There is no such thing as an automatic care order - an application has to be made to a court and a judge will decide if the parties cannot agree. Most of SS records are electronic don't see many of us walking around with great big case files anymore!