Partner lends money to ex..

bambam0074

So, scenario... for those that are married or long term partnered (forgetting legalities) who would feel comfortablke with their partner lending 10K to anyone (forget who it is) without having a full discussion with their partner.

Which as I say is my main issue with this..

Fang_3

bambam0074 wrote: »

So, scenario... for those that are married or long term partnered (forgetting legalities) who would feel comfortablke with their partner lending 10K to anyone (forget who it is) without having a full discussion with their partner.

Which as I say is my main issue with this..

You're not married. And you've only been together for two years. Good god man. Get a grip.

sassy_one

I think OP has a good right to feel like he does!

Lending that sort of money without discussing it to your other half wouldn't be fair.

I wouldn't led my ex anything, but if, and its just a IF as I wouldn't I'd tell my wife about any plans I had before I did them, even buying a new car, I'd talk to her first!

What happened to sharing thoughts before actions!!!!!!

bambam0074

When does a partnership become shared finances ?? When you have joint responsibilities such as mortgages ??

dmg24

Would it be an issue if he was lending the money to his mum/ brother/ definitely-not-an-ex mate?

justjohn

bluntly - You don't live together as much a unit as you think

You need too clear up values and impression of being a partnership/unit not the loan

Fang_3

sassy-one wrote: »

I think OP has a good right to feel like he does!

Lending that sort of money without discussing it to your other half wouldn't be fair.

I wouldn't led my ex anything, but if, and its just a IF as I wouldn't I'd tell my wife about any plans I had before I did them, even buying a new car, I'd talk to her first!

What happened to sharing thoughts before actions!!!!!!

That would make sense if your were married and had combined finances. The OP doesn't. He's just insecure.

*Louise*

Sorry, if I was in a long-term relationship and my partner just handed over 10k to an ex, I think I would be a bit annoyed if he didn't even have the decency to talk to me about it first.

Nothing to do with the money or the amount, I would be feeling as though I had been sidelined and not important enough to have discussed it with.

bambam0074

Fang have you actually ascertained how joint finances are ??

A joint mortgage which we do have should be at least a start !

Fang_3

bambam0074 wrote: »

When does a partnership become shared finances ?? When you have joint responsibilities such as mortgages ??

When you're totally legally entwined and make that decision for yourselves. Not when you both decide to keep finances separate after bills are paid, and then the minute the other does something you don't like, suddenly decide that you don't want him to have that freedom.