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Worst Day ever!
Comments
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LilacLouisa wrote: »Well we can`t even be sure that Muggi is a genuine poster can we? but if she is, and her OH has thrown her son out, and she says he has said he will go and take their daughter with him if she goes against his wishes, he still sounds like a control freak to me.
Even given that teenagers can be troublesome sometimes and a pita, this man should have a little more empathy than he seems to have shown, surely.
Is anyone ever more important than your child? that isn`t condoning parents who think their child can never do any wrong btw.
Without being disrespectful but can I ask if you have any children? And if you do are they older or younger?
I ask this because in the early days your children are totally dependent on you. As they grow older - I see my role in life to enable my children to be independent so they can live life to the full. At the age of 15 they should be starting on that path. I still love my children and would still do all i could for them but they need me less and I will need someone in the future. You cannot always put an individual child's needs first and its when you do that all the time that the child becomes a spoiled, selfish person who will up and leave the mother to a lonely life. Now Im not condoning the OP's husbands actions there obviously needs to be balance for both the parents and the child's needs. So maybe she does need to put her husband first and perhaps this situation might not have happened but that is purely speculative.I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over and through me. When it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
When the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.0 -
Actually, I wouldn't be unhappy if it wasn't a genuine situation, better that than a family in distress.That's the joy of individuality, we can all offer our own 'take' on things and hopefully between us all, the OP will be able to have a fairly rounded set of replies, covering most, if not all aspects.
As for the 'I'm taking our daughter' comment....again, he could be a controlling bully or he could just be speaking in anger because he is so frustrated.
Who knows. I hope if this is a genuine situation, the OP ends up with some sort of acceptable ending for all.0 -
Without being disrespectful but can I ask if you have any children? And if you do are they older or younger?
I ask this because in the early days your children are totally dependent on you. As they grow older - I see my role in life to enable my children to be independent so they can live life to the full. At the age of 15 they should be starting on that path. I still love my children and would still do all i could for them but they need me less and I will need someone in the future. You cannot always put an individual child's needs first and its when you do that all the time that the child becomes a spoiled, selfish person who will up and leave the mother to a lonely life. Now Im not condoning the OP's husbands actions there obviously needs to be balance for both the parents and the child's needs. So maybe she does need to put her husband first and perhaps this situation might not have happened but that is purely speculative.
Why do you need to ask if I have children, does it affect my right to give my opinion if I haven't?
I have two children, in their 20's now, and I dare say we have had as many times of teenage angst and trauma as most people. Whatever their age, whatever that particular problem, even at uni, they always knew they could tell me anything. They always know there is room for them in my home.
You can have two parents and be completely over indulged and become a spolied and selfish person. Leave their mother to a lonely life? how pathetic, she would have to be completely devoid of any self worth or self sufficency imo. Why would any woman need to live with a domineering man? (or a man with domineering woman) I have seen the result of that too often.
Also I have seen children whose mothers have made a man the centre of her world to the detriment of her children, they quite often never forgive her. and why would they?
Still, as long as she hasn`t got a lonely life eh?
If a child can't rely on its mother, or even better both parents, to be there for them in good times or bad. it`s very poor imo.0 -
So you think it's perfectly OK to hoof a 15 year old child out of the door?
ANYONE who can do this, regardless of their status to the child needs their head testing.
ETA : And you would let your OH threaten to take your child away from you?
This probably sums up the feeling of the most biased posters on here.
The op has said they have been a couple for 10 years, and own their house together. They have a daughter between them.
The dad has quite rightly said if they split he will fight for custardy of the child, as any normal caring parent would.
You have now described the poor kid as sole property of the op because she is the mother, and that not walking away from his child is a bad thing, and indeed it is even worse that the father should to love her and want to be with her.
Hopefully the op has it all sorted by now, and every one is back together as a mother and father.0 -
LilacLouisa wrote: »I would depend on what sort of input wouldn`t it?
To prevent Muggi's son from going to his grandparents, surely a safe haven even if only temporarily, is bullying isn`t it? The desire to have the upper hand at best, complete lack of concern for the welfare of a minor at worst imo.
What would have happened if there had been no friend available to take him in, would he be sleeping rough? and what would happen if he had been assaulted or harmed in some way?
Fortunately that hasn`t been the case, but it so easily could have been.
What would have happened if he went outside and found a suitcase full of money, and kept it all for himself.
He'd have the last laugh then.
The fact he was sent to a friends suggested the op had checked where he was going before he went doesn't it?0 -
What would have happened if he went outside and found a suitcase full of money, and kept it all for himself.
He'd have the last laugh then.
The fact he was sent to a friends suggested the op had checked where he was going before he went doesn't it
Does it?
I find the fact that you seem to regard a suitcase full of money, however hypothetical, more important than the support of his family, quite bizarre. Do you think the money would make his stepfather more amenable to him?0 -
LilacLouisa wrote: »What would have happened if he went outside and found a suitcase full of money, and kept it all for himself.
He'd have the last laugh then.
The fact he was sent to a friends suggested the op had checked where he was going before he went doesn't it
Does it?
I find the fact that you seem to regard a suitcase full of money, however hypothetical, more important than the support of his family, quite bizarre. Do you think the money would make his stepfather more amenable to him?
Ok, change it to "what if he found a suitcase full of magic pixies", if you like to have "what if's". I sure we can all think of more if you run out.
Or you could stick to reality and what actually was said to have happened.0 -
I am not interested in what ifs at all, it was your suggestion. Reality? are you sure you know what it is?LilacLouisa wrote: »
Ok, change it to "what if he found a suitcase full of magic pixies", if you like to have "what if's". I sure we can all think of more if you run out.
Or you could stick to reality and what actually was said to have happened.0 -
This probably sums up the feeling of the most biased posters on here.
The op has said they have been a couple for 10 years, and own their house together. They have a daughter between them.
The dad has quite rightly said if they split he will fight for custardy of the child, as any normal caring parent would.
You have now described the poor kid as sole property of the op because she is the mother, and that not walking away from his child is a bad thing, and indeed it is even worse that the father should to love her and want to be with her.
Hopefully the op has it all sorted by now, and every one is back together as a mother and father.
Excuse me, I said no such thing.
I said "ANYONE who can do this, regardless of their status to the child needs their head testing"
Meaning it doesn't matter whether it's the Mum, the Dad, the step mum, the step dad, aunty Sue or Nanna Flo, who has kicked the child out ~ it shouldn't have been done at all, by anyone.Tank fly boss walk jam nitty gritty...0 -
LilacLouisa wrote: »I would depend on what sort of input wouldn`t it?
To prevent Muggi's son from going to his grandparents, surely a safe haven even if only temporarily, is bullying isn`t it? The desire to have the upper hand at best, complete lack of concern for the welfare of a minor at worst imo.
What would have happened if there had been no friend available to take him in, would he be sleeping rough? and what would happen if he had been assaulted or harmed in some way?
Fortunately that hasn`t been the case, but it so easily could have been.LilacLouisa wrote: »I am not interested in what ifs at all, it was your suggestion. Reality? are you sure you know what it is?
Guess you weren't reading what you posted earlier then :rotfl::rotfl:0
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